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  • You're under arrest!

  • You'll never catch me, heh!

  • [laughing]

  • [laughing]

  • Hey, that's not fair, cowboys couldn't afford cannons.

  • They couldn't afford station wagons, either.

  • Nice paneling.

  • All right, pinhead, your time is up.

  • Who are you calling pinhead?

  • I wanna be Dirty Dan!

  • What makes you think you can be Dirty Dan?

  • Dirty D!

  • I'd say I'm Dirty Dan.

  • I'd say I'm Dirty Dan!

  • -No! -Yes!

  • I'd say I'm Dirty Dan, ow!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan, uff!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan, ow!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • I'm Dirty Dan, ow!

  • I'm Dirty Dan!

  • [screaming]

  • Screaming will get you--

  • [growling]

  • Which one of you fellers is the real Dirty Dan?

  • Uh, I am.

  • [screaming]

  • Patrick!

  • Hot wings.

  • Okay, pinhead Larry, now you get yours.

  • [screaming]

  • Pinhead!

  • [growling]

  • [whimpering]

  • [growling]

  • [whimpering]

  • [screaming]

  • Now you're going to pay for those crimes pinhead!

  • Andy, stand back!

  • I'm warning ya.

  • [roaring]

  • Okay, I warned ya!

  • Did you win?

  • [yelling]

  • Hi SpongeBob!

  • [roaring]

  • [screaming]

  • [snoring]

  • Okay SpongeBob, you can be Dirty Dan,

  • I just want to be Patrick.

  • No really, you gotta come save me!

  • Hey Sandy, who's your friend?

  • But, but you're supposed to be in the gorilla suit?

  • I am in the gorilla suit?

  • I thought I was doing a pretty good job.

  • If you're Patrick, then who's that?

  • [growling]

  • Ah, a really gorilla!

  • Huh?

  • [growling]

  • [screaming]

  • [growling]

  • [monkey noises]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • Oh my gosh!

  • [screaming]

  • This can't be happening!

  • [screaming\

  • This is exactly the kind of thing I was talking about!

  • Well, they were asking for it.

  • It's not like I didn't warn them about the dangers of outside.

  • Yes, Chip, I know

  • they're my two dearest friends in the whole world,

  • but I told them I wasn't going outside no matter what.

  • We can do without the name calling!

  • Thank you very much, used napkin.

  • I know Chip, if it was me out there bagged by an ape,

  • Patrick and Sandy would risk anything to save me.

  • And I've got to do the same for them.

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • Chumbucket, this is personal!

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • My name's not... Rick!

  • [screaming]

  • -I don't like you! -I don't like you more!

  • I never liked you!

  • I a thousand times never liked you!

  • -Pink! -Yellow!

  • [groaning]

  • [crowd gasping]

  • Yellow!

  • Pink?

  • You do care!

  • [sobbing]

  • I love this show!

  • [screaming]

  • [yelling]

  • Uh, just a second, safety first!

  • And now, spin technique!

  • [yelling]

  • Double overhand squirrel knot.

  • I'm going to get you tomorrow SpongeBob!

  • That'll be the day!

  • Woot woot woot woot woot woot!

  • Nice try, little man.

  • Hey, I was in front of you!

  • -No you weren't! -Are you calling me a liar?

  • I ain't calling you for dinner!

  • [yelling]

  • Hold it you two.

  • That's enough, you're both plenty tough,

  • go ahead of me.

  • -All right! -Thanks Rich.

  • [humming]

  • -Hello? -Hiya!

  • [karate sounds]

  • Nice try Sponge brain!

  • Um, Squidward you're standing on my foot.

  • Oh, sorry SpongeBob.

  • And you got your elbow in my ribs.

  • Ew... Patrick!

  • And stop stepping in my potato salad!

  • -Hey hey hey guys! -Stop pushing me, Patrick!

  • You mean like this?

  • No, like this!

  • You shouldn't fight in here! This is a magical place.

  • Patrick, get off of me!

  • I told you I am claustrophobic!

  • Nice try, Squidward.

  • But there is no Santa Claus here.

  • Beautiful day, beautiful sky,

  • beautiful plants, hi plants, beautiful... pile of cans?

  • Sandy, that is your worst disguise yet.

  • No, it's not SpongeBob, this is!

  • Now prepare for a long, merciless whooping!

  • [screaming]

  • Mm hmm, my favorite!

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • By the powers of naughtiness,

  • I command this particular drop of hot sauce

  • to be really, really hot!

  • Sandy, wait!

  • Victory is yours.

  • I knew you'd come to your senses SpongeBob.

  • [gulping]

  • [yelling]

  • I guess I'm gonna have to take it from you.

  • Yeah, right.

  • You and what army?

  • Only the army of the living dead.

  • Oh no, I've seen this on the Late Show.

  • You ghoulish fiends hold me down

  • and take turns nibbling on my innards!

  • Then you eat my brain and leave my body for the buzzards!

  • That's disgusting.

  • We just want the hat back.

  • No flipping way!

  • -Back up, back up I say! -Attack!

  • Tally ho!

  • Look at me, I'm Errol Flynn.

  • You're falling apart marrow brain!

  • You must be kidding.

  • Back to oblivion!

  • Ho ho, how is your sister?

  • All right boneheads, play time's over!

  • Yee haw!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • A million dollars.

  • I've got a million dollars!

  • Making sandwiches sure is fun, right Sandy?

  • Right?

  • Uh, I guess I'll eat one now.

  • You're mince meat!

  • In your dreams!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Super acquaintances attack!

  • Oh no, please mercy!

  • Crack-a-tella!

  • [screaming]

  • Get it off, get it off get it off get it off!

  • Get it off get it off get it off get it off get it off!

  • I'll save you Quick Stir!

  • [screaming]

  • I'll cool you off Quick Stir with one of my water balls!

  • Uh, uh...

  • -A-ha! -Huh?

  • No no, no no, I'm not the Quickster,

  • I'm Captain--

  • Well, I guess it's up to me.

  • I'll just sneak over unseen and catch him by surprise.

  • [screaming]

  • Get it off get it off get it off!

  • Ugh, phew, glad that's over.

  • SpongeBob?

  • Ha, ha ha ha!

  • You cannot pass unless you defeat me,

  • the Tickler, and my iron finger style!

  • Ha ha!

  • -Ha ha, look! -Huh?

  • [giggling]

  • Prepare for the tickling of your life!

  • Taste these!

  • Oh no, jelly filled doughnuts?

  • How did you know they were my weakness?

  • No one can resist jelly filled!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Sticky around, I'll be back with the glaze.

  • I could use a wet nap.

  • All right, who's next?

  • Halt, no one advances past me,

  • Lipservus, and my power flex dynamo-lip thruster style!

  • [yelling]

  • Dance squirrel, dance!

  • [laughing]

  • Advanced hairdryer style!

  • Ha ha ha, what do you expect to do with that?

  • [hairdryer blowing]

  • Oh no, not chapped lips!

  • [yelling]

  • That's enough lip out of you!

  • [yelling]

  • No one has ever made it to the lair of filthy Phil!

  • No one passes except me!

  • Now, feel the steam of my horrible body odor!

  • [grunting]

  • Ha ha, Phil!

  • Your foul stench can permeate my fresh air dome!

  • Fresh air dome?

  • Man, I really do stink.

  • [yelling]

  • You are one impressive squirrel.

  • You even made a costume change.

  • -Release SpongeBob! -Never!

  • [yelling]

  • You're going down, Tubby!

  • Tubby?

  • [growling]

  • Nobody calls me tubby!

  • Wait Patrick, you're supposed to let me win, remember?

  • Oh yeah.

  • [yelling]

  • No, please wait!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • [yelling]

  • [groaning]

  • No, please, have mercy!

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • I won't give in to your timeshare vacation scam!

  • Then give in to my fists!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • [roaring]

  • [roaring]

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • You're in the soup now, Udan!

  • [indistinct chatter]

  • Hold on to my dime, boy.

  • [screaming]

  • -Well, that was anticlimactic. -Again.

  • [yelling]

  • [crying]

  • Whoa!

  • [screaming]

  • Wait a minute, gimme that!

  • [cheering]

  • -Hey! -Hey!

  • -Hey! -Hey!

  • -Hey! -Hey!

  • [groaning]

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • [laughing]

  • Would you two please keep it down?

  • Squidward, you're just in time to enlist in my army!

  • Join me and together we will defeat the Pink Menace!

  • That's me!

  • I can start you off as a buck private, but with hard work

  • perhaps you can rise through the ranks

  • and become a regular private.

  • Thanks, but no thanks, Major Stupidity.

  • You and General Nonsense over there

  • will have to fight without me.

  • Heh heh, got 'em both, heh heh.

  • Patrick, you fool!

  • This was over before it started.

  • I will now consider your unconditional surrend--

  • [laughing]

  • So that's how he wants it to go down.

  • [laughing]

  • Ha, you missed me!

  • Score one for the boys back home!

  • Oh Sandy-- [gasps]

  • Sandy's in trouble! Don't worry Sandy,

  • I'm coming to save you!

  • Try again Sandy, your kick should fly higher.

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Who is this intruder that fails to attack me?

  • You're the prettiest button I've ever--

  • [gasps] Monster!

  • -SpongeBob! -It's after SpongeBob!

  • You're right button, no monster is gonna eat our friend!

  • [roaring]

  • SpongeBob! No, no no no!

  • [yelling]

  • Oh no, my two best friends are fighting!

  • This restraining order says

  • I can't get close enough to break it up!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • I'm sorry restraining order, but my friends need me.

  • [screaming]

  • Stop!

  • Enough talk!

  • If you want your belt, you're going to have to tussle it out.

  • So let the match begin!

  • All right, brace yourself Sandy

  • because it is about to get rough and tumble!

  • Okay SpongeBob, you gotta catch me first!

  • [yelling]

  • Most impressive Sandy, but I am here to evaluate SpongeBob.

  • Let's see what he can do on the offensive.

  • Okay Sandy.

  • [yelling]

  • Prepare for my finishing move, I call it the sleeper.

  • Huh?

  • Very good Sandy.

  • You put your opponent to sleep in under one minute.

  • He's in that cave.

  • -Sandy, are you sure-- -Of course I am.

  • I'm going in, and I ain't coming out

  • till I got me a big heaping plate of worm stew!

  • [whimpering]

  • A-ha, there you are, you tail nabbin' varmint!

  • [yelling]

  • -I'm winning SpongeBob! -Sandy, that's not--

  • [yelling]

  • -This shouldn't take long! -Sandy, that's--

  • [yelling]

  • -Almost done! -Sandy!

  • Yee haw, I got 'em SpongeBob!

  • Sandy?

  • Boy howdy, this critter put up some sort of fight.

  • But I'm from Texas, and as you can see,

  • no worm is a match for me!

  • I even find my tail.

  • That's not the worm.

  • -Pardon? -That's not the worm.

  • That's his tongue.

  • Ohhh!

  • This is the tongue.

  • And the whole thing is the worm.

  • Run for your life!

  • [roaring]

  • Hey waiter, an empty plate?

  • [yelling]

  • Oh, I forgot the fries!

  • Now I see you are a skilled opponent,

  • with a cold blooded heart of a warrior!

  • You little crabby patties are so cute!

  • Hmm, something's not right here.

  • It's the onions, they've gone bad!

  • He's on the offensive.

  • Time for you to end this.

  • That's showin' him, SpongeBob.

  • You gonna give him a belt Fuzzy or have you not had enough yet?

  • You brought me to the dance, but the universe is cutting in!

  • Huh?

  • Okay, looking good.

  • Sponge Man, smell the vibrations!

  • Take the fries! I almost forgot.

  • -More patties! -Bringing them now.

  • Your fries sir.

  • [yelling]

  • Your fries sir. Ketchup?

  • Oops.

  • [yelling]

  • Got it.

  • Oh, Fuzzy!

  • -Oh no! Sensei Fuzzy, are you okay?

  • I was wrong about you SpongeBob.

  • You have bested Fuzzy with your karate greatness.

  • [coughing]

  • You are now a karate master!

  • -Here. -For me?

  • [roaring]

  • [roaring]

  • [whimpering]

  • [snoring]

  • [mumbling]

  • [whimpering]

  • [roaring]

  • [snoring]

  • Mmm, you making meatballs, Grandma?

  • Time for dinner already?

  • [roaring]

  • [screaming]

  • [whimpering]

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [mumbling]

  • Gary!

  • [whimpering]

  • You put Fluffy down right now!

  • Bad boy Gary! Bad, bad, bad boy!

  • Bad, bad Gary, bad!

  • I told you and told you and told you told you and told you--

  • Oh hello, are you a friend of Fluff--

  • What's going on?

  • Okay, now, this is starting to hurt.

  • That is exactly what I was talking about--

  • [roaring]

  • [roaring]

  • Fluffy, Fluffy wait!

  • Well Gary, what do you have to say for yourself?

  • Now hand over that sack of groceries

  • before things get ugly.

  • Groceries? You'll have to pull my groceries

  • from my cold, wet tentacles, bucko!

  • [yelling]

  • Think that's gonna stop me?

  • You are not getting me without a fight!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Got you... right where I want you!

  • Vengeance... is... mine!

  • Vengeance? Squidward Tentacles,

  • I told you at the beginning that karate ain't for revenge.

  • You mean you sent my best friend

  • on a dangerous wild goose chase just so you could go shopping?

  • Excuse us SpongeBob.

  • This is for my tail.

  • [yelling]

  • This is for almost getting us killed!

  • [yelling]

  • And this is for my [INDISCERNIBLE] Matilda!

  • [groaning]

  • [yelling]

  • I guess I had that coming.

  • Do I find myself on this dark and scary street yet again?

  • We'll just see what happens this time.

  • Hey, you!

  • Let me give a taste, a mere morsel of what's in store...

  • [yelling]

  • That one was called washing Sandy's windows.

  • Stay back or you're gonna get it!

  • I am warning you.

  • Okay buddy, I warned you.

  • I like to call this one taking out Sandy's trash.

  • [yelling]

  • What? Ow!

  • Ha ha ha, how do you like them apples?

  • [yelling]

  • Feel my wrath!

  • How's your uncle?

  • [screaming]

  • And as my finishing move, I give you...

  • watering Sandy's lawn.

  • [yelling]

  • [groaning]

  • What was that for?

  • I was just trying to give you back your groceries you dropped!

  • Uh, oh.

  • Teddy, I found him. He's over here.

  • You forgot your belt, silly.

  • [screaming]

  • Gosh, what happened to you?

  • This guy's been... karate'd!

  • [yelling]

  • Huh?

  • Well, if it isn't my two babysitters!

  • You'll humiliated me!

  • -Prunes, you're alive. -And still talking baby talk.

  • Why I oughta...

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • Aww, Prunie wants to play.

  • Nice old lady!

  • [snoring]

  • Aww, her boxing tuckered her out.

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [roaring]

  • How about some soothing music, jellyfish?

  • [recorder music]

  • A soothing sitar always brings me peace.

  • [guitar sounds]

  • Whoa!

  • [groaning]

  • The gongs!

  • They always calm me down.

  • [roaring]

  • [gonging]

  • [humming]

  • [growling]

  • [gonging]

  • Okay, that does it!

  • I was a pacifist, but now I'm gonna

  • pass my fist through your face!

  • As destroyer and transformer, I transform to destroy you.

  • [roaring]

  • Put up your dukes and fight me like a squirrel!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Sandy, catch!

  • The universe gave us a terrible weapon made up

  • of the darkest dark matter, just for this occasion.

  • Ever played dodge the chum?

  • [growling]

  • Hey, get your slimy mitts off my pals!

  • [yelling]

  • [roaring]

  • Whoa!

  • [growling]

  • [yelling]

  • Nothing, that's it!

  • [yelling]

  • [giggling]

  • If see bears really exist, why didn't one show up?

  • Maybe it's because you're not

  • wearing your sombrero in a goofy fashion?

  • Oh, sorry, how silly of me.

  • You mean like this?

  • [laughing]

  • No, like that.

  • [growling]

  • [screaming]

  • [roaring]

  • [screaming]

  • Squidward, are you okay?

  • No!

  • Quick, jump inside our anti-sea bear circle

  • before he comes back!

  • Yeah, sea bears often attack more than once!

  • Are you crazy?

  • A dirt circle won't stop that monster!

  • I'm running for my life!

  • No!

  • [screaming]

  • Don't run! Sea bears hate that!

  • Thanks for the tip.

  • I guess I'll just limp home then.

  • No!

  • [screaming]

  • They hate limping more than running!

  • Well, I guess I'll just have--

  • [screaming]

  • I should have warned you about crawling!

  • [screaming]

  • What'd I do at that time?

  • I don't know, I guess he just doesn't like you!

  • Pretend to be somebody else!

  • Here, draw a circle.

  • Okay!

  • [roaring]

  • [screaming]

  • That was an oval! It has to be a circle!

  • Move over!

  • [growling]

  • [growling]

  • Hey, it worked!

  • You guys saved my life!

  • [cheering]

  • Yeah, I'm glad it was just a sea bear,

  • this circle would never hold back a sea rhinoceros!

  • What attracts them?

  • The sound of a sea bear attack.

  • Heh, good thing we're all wearing our anti-sea rhinoceros

  • undergarments, right Squidward?

  • Hundreds of wrestlers

  • from around the world face off against the heavyweight champs!

  • [roaring]

  • [crowd ooo-ing]

  • [roaring]

  • [roaring]

  • Look out!

  • Hold on little squirrel!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • You have fought well giant clam, prepare to be vanquished.

  • [grunting]

  • Hey, I'm actually doing it.

  • [grunting]

  • [yelling]

  • Your shell is mine!

  • [grunting]

  • Hold on there little square dude!

  • [yelling]

  • Hey, you like karate too!

  • Hello fellow competitors!

  • [roaring]

  • What was that?

  • Hmm, that's wrestle-eese for you're dead meat.

  • I don't get it.

  • Hey look Patrick, it's Mr. Krabs cheering us on!

  • Whoa!

  • Oh, hey SpongeBob.

  • Hey Patrick, look Patrick it's a fist.

  • Fist? Where?

  • Oh yeah, that's definitely a--

  • [cheering]

  • [gargling]

  • [yelling]

  • Aww SpongeBob, I'm just not feeling up to karate right now.

  • Heh heh, I get it, not feeling up to karate.

  • Whatever you say, Sandy.

  • Boy, I hope Sandy doesn't attack me from behind.

  • [yelling]

  • [growling]

  • Patrick are you okay?

  • Oh, oh I'm fine. I just like to suck on my hand.

  • Really? Me too.

  • [screaming]

  • Oh, heh heh, now what?

  • [giggling]

  • That tickles.

  • Good catch!

  • -Look, I'm a-- -Helicopter!

  • [whistling]

  • Whoa!

  • [cheering]

  • [whistling]

  • [giggling]

  • [giggling]

  • [laughing]

  • Behold your champion!

  • That piece of junk?

  • Hold on, you haven't seen it in action yet.

  • I'll just set it for our quarry...

  • No.

  • Money money money!

  • Ignore that one.

  • A-ha, bingo!

  • You have your orders, attack!

  • Oh no you don't!

  • [growling]

  • Mallet, please.

  • Okay, maybe the death robot wasn't the best idea.

  • You think?

  • And it looks like the champs are ready to end it.

  • End it?

  • End it, end it, end it!

  • Get up you guys!

  • Yep, they're going to leave more than a mark

  • with this special move.

  • the mother of all moves, the flying, double decker,

  • atomic head butt of destruction... with a spin.

  • [screaming]

  • Come on come on, wake up!

  • [snoring]

  • Squeeze!

  • Oh who am I kidding, goodbye money.

  • Squeeze!

  • Goodbye money!

  • [sobbing]

  • A squeeze!

  • -Oh no! -Not iron butts!

  • [crowd groaning]

  • [whistling]

  • [bell ringing]

  • [grunting]

  • [cheering]

  • Mr. Krabs!

  • This is a prison break, boy.

  • Let's get a move on, we got a bunch of hungry

  • customers back home, and I need your help.

  • fleecing, I mean, I mean feeding them.

  • I'm sorry Mr. Krabs, I can't go.

  • I haven't finished paying my debt to society yet.

  • But, can't go?

  • When I say we're leaving, we're leaving!

  • Hey, you're not supposed to be in here!

  • Eat claw, bubble cop!

  • Huh?

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • Honey!

  • Good thing they were all just bubbles eh?

  • [giggling]

  • Oh I'll be changing all right, but not into a bathing suit.

  • Wait until Sandy sees that I brought my karate gear!

  • [yelling]

  • Sandy won't beat me this time

  • because I've got the elements on my side.

  • The elements of surprise!

  • Hiya!

  • -SpongeBob, are you ready? -Yes Sandy!

  • I most certainly am ready.

  • Ready to get it on.

  • [yelling]

  • Look SpongeBob, we both brought our karate gear.

  • Great minds think alike, I suppose.

  • Hiya!

  • I may be down, but I'm not out!

  • Way to go buddy, it took us three days

  • to make that potato salad, three days!

  • [yelling]

  • -Sandy? -Oh I'm Sandy all right!

  • I'm very Sandy.

  • [yelling]

  • Oh I get it, she's Sandy, that's her name.

  • She's also covered in yes.

  • Back in Texas we call ice cream frozen cow juice.

  • Excuse me for a second.

  • [yelling]

  • -Thank you. -No no, thank you.

  • [yelling]

  • Who threw that piece of paper at me?

  • [whimpering]

  • A boat jacker!

  • I never thought I'd have to use this pepper spray.

  • [screaming]

  • Somebody help me! Somebody help me!

  • Sorry SpongeBob, but it was for your own good.

  • Give me back my boat!

  • [screaming]

  • You'd better stop this boat!

  • I'm not letting go!

  • Nothing will stop me.

  • Not even... giant clams?

  • [screaming]

  • I'm not letting go, even for... cheese graters?

  • [screaming]

  • If you think I'll let go

  • for a little... educational television?

  • Oh no!

  • [screaming]

  • Looks like that got rid of him, now for some tunes!

  • And now back to KRUD, with all of your personal,

  • you won't get away with stealing my car hits.

  • [screaming]

  • Hey look.

  • [screaming]

  • Argh, I'd never let you have this boat!

  • Not even if you were--

  • [gasps]

  • Mrs. Puff?

  • [babbling]

  • [siren wailing]

  • I ask it once more, before I rip you limb from limb,

  • reveal thyself!

  • I am SpongeBob and this is Patrick.

  • We've been sent to rescue Princess Pearl

  • from Planktonamore.

  • If thou wishes to get across that wilts have

  • to get through me!

  • [gasps]

  • Medieval Sandy, I know how to handle this,

  • with a little karate.

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • By the hammer of Odin,

  • this be a new fighting style mine eyes have not yet seen.

  • I am bad, oh yeah, woo!

  • Don't thou tryeth to insult me,

  • thou wilst drink from the fountain of shame!

  • You hear that Patrick?

  • I told you she sings like a squirrel.

  • [yelling]

  • [giggling]

  • Good one medieval Sandy!

  • But can you handle my feet of fury?

  • [yelling]

  • Wouldest thou like a little rub down?

  • [coughing]

  • [coughing and wheezing]

  • You have bested me yellow knight,

  • strike quick and true, noble sponge.

  • I don't understand a word you just said!

  • [giggling]

  • Uh, medieval Sandy, you don't look so good.

  • How do you like me now?

  • I like you this much!

  • Whoa!

  • Feel me!

  • Whoa!

  • Patrick!

  • Patrick, are you okay?

  • Question is... will you be?

  • [screaming]

  • [sobbing]

  • No fair!

  • All fair in love and war, my friend slash enemy.

  • Or should I say, my friend-enemy?

  • Let's have some real fun.

  • [screaming]

  • What was that?

  • Come on, we gotta get out of here!

  • [screaming]

  • Oh yeah?

  • Two can play at this game.

  • Jumpin' jellyfish, whoa!

  • [giggling]

  • I wasn't gonna do this, but you left me no choice.

  • Ugh!

  • Oh, let's beat it dude.

  • [laughing]

  • Huh?

  • [groaning]

  • Oh, missed one.

  • Trash!

  • Hey, that's mine! I'm cleaning these offices.

  • Patrick, catch!

  • Trash!

  • No!

  • Run!

  • [yelling]

  • [panting]

  • [screaming]

  • [panting]

  • Boo boo.

  • [yelling]

  • Oh no, I'm bleeding!

  • It's okay, it's decaf.

  • Trash trash trash!

  • SpongeBob why is this happening?

  • Trash trash trash trash trash!

  • Trash!

  • Trash!

  • Oh look, you garbage can thing!

  • I don't know what we did to you, but I made a Krusty Krab pledge

  • to your boss to clean these offices.

  • No!

  • Whoa!

  • No, my rump is roasting!

  • Hey, Patrick may be trashy...

  • [burping]

  • but he's not trash!

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Mmm, Patrick soup.

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Sorry to do this, but you'll have to stay here

  • until we finish cleaning.

  • Here, this should tide you over till we're done.

  • He's going through the door.

  • [giggling]

  • He's knocking out the door!

  • Squidward's answering the door, and...

  • [yelling]

  • He's beating up Squidward!

  • [laughing]

  • [yelling]

  • Doodle boy, stop!

  • Ow!

  • [yelling]

  • He's got the pencil.

  • [beeping]

  • You again?

  • Oh good, soda, I was getting thirsty again.

  • [yelling]

  • This is not refreshing!

  • [screaming]

  • Man, you do not take a bad picture!

  • [screaming]

  • [yelling]

  • Hang in there buddy, hang in there!

  • Hey!

  • Hey, where'd you get the tank, Patrick?

  • It's what this company makes, tanks.

  • How did I not notice that?

  • We'll use these as ammunition!

  • Retreat, retreat!

  • Hello!

  • Hey trash bot.

  • [burping]

  • Mmm, trash!

  • On the count of three, we'll jump out and surprise him!

  • Oh boy, a surprise party. Is it his birthday?

  • [yelling]

  • Patrick, Patrick, do something!

  • Happy birthday!

  • [screaming]

  • Here's your present!

  • You're welcome.

  • Hold it right there, Doodle.

  • I brought you into this world

  • and now I'm going to take you out!

  • Any last words?

  • [gibberish]

  • I'm sorry, what was that?

  • [gibberish]

  • [yelling]

  • Hold still Doodle, this is for your own good!

  • Take that, and this and this and that, and this,

  • that this that that!

  • [grunting]

  • [screaming]

  • I am SpongeBob, destroyer of evil!

  • Take it easy, it's just a drawing.

  • The humiliation in here stinks!

  • This is all your fault, Plankton.

  • I'm gonna peel off your face at lunchtime.

  • Why wait? Let's take a coffee break.

  • Ow!

  • Swirly!

  • [yelling]

  • Hey, I am trying to read!

  • [screaming]

  • Two guys, fighting! Toilet paper everywhere!

  • Oh yeah?

  • Who's defiling my restroom!

  • [yelling]

  • -He did it. -He did it.

  • -He did it. -No he did it!

  • [yelling]

  • Get off of him Plankton!

  • It was obviously Krabs' fault!

  • Why you siding with Plankton?

  • Why are you siding with Krabs?

  • -They're arguing! -And spinning out!

  • -Stop hitting myself! -Ow, stop hitting myself!

  • What in Neptune's name is wrong with myself?

  • [yelling]

  • Geez, is that what we sound like?

  • I hope not, 'cause that's pathetic.

  • [yelling]

  • [whistle blowing]

  • All right you clones,

  • I want a clean fight, no rough stuff.

  • Go back to your corners, when the bell rings,

  • come out fighting.

  • But first you gotta shake hands.

  • Wow, this is a great handshake!

  • Splitting so soon?

  • [laughing]

  • Ah, Doodle Bob! Heh, no hard feelings, right?

  • [screaming]

  • What do you think you're doing Doodle?

  • You Doodle, me SpongeBob!

  • [screaming]

  • [screaming]

  • [yelling]

  • Huh?

  • [yelling]

  • [screaming]

  • Be careful with that thing! Who knows what'll happen?

  • I nose.

  • [yelling]

  • [laughing]

  • Very funny Doodle.

  • Now it's my turn.

  • [grunting]

  • Well Doodle, it looks like this is a draw.

  • You've made your point.

  • No matter, I was voted most artistic in high school.

  • Ow, SpongeBob, you're going to pay for that!

  • Uh, maybe it was most clumsy.

  • [screaming]

  • [yelling]

  • [yelling]

  • Huh?

  • [yelling]

  • Huh?

  • [yelling]

  • Paper!

  • Page for Mr. Doodle!

You're under arrest!

Subtitles and vocabulary

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