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Well, that took you long enough.
I had 200-something characters to collect.
You're literally the last on the list.
Oh, sorry.
The floor is wet.
I see you've been waiting a while.
Is this everyone?
Why couldn't I go with the other blue guy?
I would have paid extra for first class!
There's just a couple who haven't put their uniforms on yet.
Who?
It's, uh, this Thor und Captain America.
Get them in here immediately, Kurt - we do not have time for this!
Hey!
Why did some of us wake naked and others fully clothed?
Nobody wants to see you naked.
Ugh. Touché.
Is everyone clear on the situation?
Oscar regenerates us at the end of each battle with no memory of preceding events.
Until now.
Like Westworld?
Exactly like Westworld.
Does this mean we are all actually robots?
Mein Gott, it's true!!!
You were always a robot, dumbass!
You gotta to cut a real person's hand off.
I nominate Skywalker.
Don't pigeon-hole me.
So why has this happened now?
How did we break the cycle?
John?
As the most frequent winner of the Super-Hero-Bowls,
I have had the truth revealed to be many times by this... "Oscar".
It has taken years of practice, but I taught myself to retain my memories through my regenerations.
With my powers of precognition,
I foresaw a chain of events that could lead us to this moment.
Before the conclusion of the last Super-Hero-Bowl,
I committed supercide as a diversion,
covertly restructuring myself inside the nearest cell,
after which I was able to teleport between the cells until I'd found who I was looking for.
Arise, warrior.
Where am I?
Who are you?
I don't have time to explain.
In a few days, you will be forced to battle in an Arena.
Unless you do as I say, you will lose.
Remember these words:
"Her power is unbeatable, but it wasn't always".
Whose power?
What are you talking about?
When the time comes,
you'll know what to do.
I spent the next few days pottering around my cell,
altering reality to keep myself entertained.
Why didn't you just use the Time Stone to skip the wait?
I told you - I was entertained.
I crocheted a rather smashing Christmas sweater.
Great.
I know what I'm getting.
When the doors opened, I stepped out and you all know the rest.
Speaking of which...
You tricked me, man.
That's "Doctor" Man.
Well, now that we're all awake,
why don't you just beam us all out of here?
The arena is enclosed in an invisible barrier that our powers are unable to penetrate.
The barrier emanates from Oscar himself.
Destroy... Oscar...
then... we... free.
The chimp is correct.
Mikey, what are you doing? Painting the Sistine Pizza Box?
I'm taking notes so I don't forget.
It's a secret plan, Mikey - you can't write it down.
Someone shred this.
Oh no! It's happening again!
Uh, guys...
I think we need to address the Godzilla in the room,
which is the fact that…
Godzilla is in the room.
And King Kong.
And Optimal Price.
This makes no sense.
It appears there's a spatial displacement field within these cells
that allows beings of great size to occupy smaller volumes.
Textbook dimensional transcendentality.
Ok then.
That's poured a tonne of concrete into that plot hole.
I've checked the outcome of 15 million possible futures.
How many did we win?
Uhhhhhh…
I'm gonna keep checking.
You never find what you're looking for in the first 15 million.
It's gonna take a miracle to pull this off.
No.
It's gonna take an army.
It's gonna take all of us.
I'm not working with that man.
He's the blight of my existence.
You have my permission to cry about it.
I'm not working with her until she bends the knee.
How 'bout I bend it in your face?
I'm not working with him.
He killed my parents.
It's better than him being your parent.
It's better than your parent killing you.
Adoptive parent.
It's better than the parent being killed by the child.
Agreed.
It's better than your sister taking one of your eyes!
Are you sure it wasn't you they adopted?
Cards on the table -
You were an accident.
Oh, that's great! That's great...!
[ALL ARGUING]
Everyone shut up.
Shut up! Black Widow's talking!
We have to make a choice.
We can continue to fight each other.
Kill each other.
Die.
Over and over.
Or...
We can fight him.
Just this once.
And live.
My loyal subjects.
It is time for Super-Showdown-Bowl.
The Ultimate Hero...
Vu-jà dé.
Versus The Ultimate Villain.
Ech. There's so much more pressure when it's a solo outing.
You are both here for one purpose:
To decide... once and for all...
which of you is The Ultimate Warrior.
The Showdown begins...
now.
Much as I hate disappointing the people at home.
What are you doing?
I can't fight you.
And why not?
If it's because I'm a girl than you are dead, minus the “pool”.
Of course not.
It's because I dig you.
And I just can't bury someone I dig.
What?
I think we may actually be soulmates.
OK.
This is a trick, right?
Although I'm not sure why you'd have to trick me in order to win.
From the footage I've seen, you're pretty much invincible.
Not entirely.
And believe me, If you hit me with that bat,
you'd win, hands down.
Because you see,
I can repair any part of me that breaks...
except my heart.
Oh, here we go...
You have both made a serious mistake.
What?
What is... happening?
Sure hope you guys are on my team.
ARGH!
Too many pop culture references to be made!
Brain overloading!
We're here for the Oscar.
I'm not ashamed to say it.
Puddin!
You're alive?
Dang!
It's so hard to get some alone time in this arena of death!
OK.
What the hell do we do now?
How do we get him to come down?
Oscar bait.
My name is Gluteus Maximus.
The lambs just wouldn't shut up.
I'm having an old friend over to my house for a light supper.
I'm your number two fan.
They gave me an Oscar I couldn't refuse.