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  • Holy Mother of all creatures, great and small!

  • It's the largest Krabby Patty the world has ever seen!

  • It's...

  • it's...

  • gorgeous!

  • Oh great Patty, take me!

  • Take me home, Daddy!

  • [screaming]

  • Keep running! It's getting closer!

  • No! It isn't!

  • Look where I'm pointing.

  • It stopped!

  • Hey, he's right!

  • One Krabby Patty for me and a Pipsqueak Patty for the boy.

  • Now, wait just a darn minute.

  • Aw!

  • I don't want a Pipsqueak Patty.

  • I want an adult size Krabby Patty!

  • The Krabby Patty is too big for you.

  • You'll never finish it.

  • Don't you see what you're doing?

  • You're treating me like a child.

  • The boy's eyes are bigger than his stomach.

  • [laughing]

  • And that's another thing.

  • I'm not a boy! I'm so old,

  • I got hairs growing out of the wrinkles on my liver spots.

  • One Pipsqueak Patty...

  • and your bib and high chair.

  • [laughing]

  • Hey, my Krabby Patty is just a bun!

  • And the two buns,

  • they're also buns,

  • stale buns.

  • My patty tastes like sadness.

  • Alright, that's enough.

  • Patties with emotional flavors,

  • it's two bits extra. Now, pay at the register.

  • I am your boss, and I order you to give me that patty!

  • No, Mr. Krabs, I will not!

  • But I will give you these.

  • Nature Patties!

  • - Oh boy! - How delightful.

  • Dig in, boys!

  • [mumbling]

  • Oh!

  • It's like eating the inside of a lawnmower.

  • I think mine is mostly stones.

  • Out here, we call them forest tomatoes.

  • Everyone, watch and learn.

  • No one watches Jim.

  • One Patty, the right way.

  • [cheering]

  • It's a thing of beauty.

  • What's so great about a Jim Patty anyway?

  • Eh. It's okay.

  • Wow!

  • That was...

  • amazing.

  • My Kiddy Meal didn't come with a toy!

  • Hmm.

  • And you'd like to upgrade to the toy package.

  • Is that right?

  • Mr. Krabs, the Krusty Krab doesn't have any toys.

  • Oh really?

  • Then what do you call... this?

  • [gasping]

  • An official Krusty Krab licensed toy!

  • My purpose in life is to have you as my toy.

  • Eek.

  • Disgusting.

  • Yep, it's pretty special, alright.

  • And it can be yours for only...

  • hey good lookin'.

  • I love you. Officially Licensed Krabby Patty Toy.

  • No, too formal.

  • I think I'll call you... oh, Patty Pal!

  • Too bad we couldn't take the elevator,

  • but it is for guests only

  • and you are an employee.

  • Your room, sir.

  • And I'd like to order room service.

  • I'd like a Krabby Patty with cheese,

  • toenail clippings, and nose hairs.

  • [gasping]

  • You've got to be kidding me!

  • And I want it here in five seconds.

  • Yes, sir!

  • Here you are, sir!

  • Well, you got your stinky sandwich,

  • now eat it.

  • Oh, I'm not gonna eat this.

  • - You are. - What?

  • You're outta your mind

  • if you think I'm gonna eat that s...

  • Shh!

  • That's not really a Krabby Patty

  • with cheese toenails and nose hair.

  • [laughing]

  • Now, I get you boy.

  • [laughing]

  • Alright, Squidward.

  • [laughing]

  • [laughing]

  • SpongeBob!

  • Sorry, Mr. Krabs. We were all out of cheese.

  • Hooray!

  • [gasping]

  • Oh no, Squidward, wait. There's cheese on these patties!

  • And?

  • Bubble Buddy's lactose intolerant. He can't eat cheese.

  • What should we do?

  • We?

  • How about you take these patties and...

  • Mr. Squidward!

  • Don't worry, Bubble Buddy.

  • Squidward will make a fresh batch.

  • What? Is he allergic to bread too?

  • Actually, he doesn't like the crust.

  • And Squidward,

  • the ketchup should be under the patty.

  • And Squidward, the pickles should be on the left side.

  • And Squidward, you should.

  • And Squidward. And Squidward...

  • Here! One of everything!

  • No cheese, no crust, pickles to the left,

  • four squirts ketchup, wheat buns, non dairy lettuce,

  • and farm raised tomatoes,

  • Carnival style!

  • And if there's anything else I can do, please hesitate to ask!

  • I'm starving.

  • No problem. Two patties coming right up.

  • [humming]

  • Your Doodle Patty, sir.

  • Tastes weird!

  • Yeah, they are a little dry.

  • Welcome to the Krusty Krab.

  • My name is Squidward.

  • May I take your order?

  • Hmm. Uh...

  • Oh, I'll have a uh... no. Oh! Maybe, no. Hmm.

  • I'll have... no. Oh maybe...

  • Are you planning on ordering today, sir?

  • I'll have a Krabby Patty.

  • How original?

  • And with extra onions.

  • Daring today, aren't we?

  • One Krabby Patty, extra onions.

  • One Crying Johnny, coming up!

  • First bun, then Patty,

  • followed by ketchup, mustard, pickles,

  • extra onions, lettuce, cheese, tomatoes, and bun.

  • In that order. One Crying Johnny, up!

  • Whatever.

  • Krabby Patty's again?

  • [sighing]

  • If only there were something else.

  • Hey, what you got there, Frank?

  • It's new. Tastes just like a Krabby Patty,

  • but it's shaped like a wiener.

  • Well, that's sounds very interesting.

  • Krabby Patty has a bold new shape!

  • Hey, I'd like to request a wiener.

  • Me too.

  • Wieners! Wieners! Wieners!

  • Squidward, what's that noise?

  • Excruciating.

  • Up here, boy! Take a look.

  • I can't read it from here, Mr. Krabs!

  • What's it say?

  • It says, Krusty Dogs.

  • Only $3.99 or $4.99 with cheese.

  • $4.99? That's highway robbery.

  • [indiscernible], Monsieur Squidward.

  • [indiscernible]

  • My Krusty Dog, handwritten on the menu.

  • Oh pinch me, Squidward!

  • Excuse me, Mr. Pizza Man.

  • You need a fry cook?

  • Ah, boy, do I?

  • Can you make pizza?

  • Okay.

  • Probably.

  • Oh, that's amazing. Congratulations.

  • You're hired.

  • Cool.

  • Well, it's no Krabby Patty, but perhaps I'll find contentment.

  • Hey, buddy, how's the pizza coming?

  • Almost done. But I did change the recipe a bit.

  • [laughing]

  • No problem.

  • Few extra toppings never hurt anyone.

  • Huh?

  • What have you done?

  • You turned an innocent pizza into...

  • a Pizza Patty!

  • It's an abomination!

  • Yeah, of deliciousness!

  • You're fired!

  • But who will make the Krabby Patties?

  • Krabby Patties?

  • What do you think this is? The Krusty Krab?

  • Hey, Taco Man, may have a job por favor?

  • Hmm.

  • Alright.

  • Let's see what you can do with a burrito.

  • How about that?

  • Interesting.

  • It's some sort of Burrito Patty.

  • Hmm.

  • Who'd like to taste it?

  • I'll give it a go!

  • You're a fired!

  • Okay, Mr. Krabs, prepare yourself!

  • Don't bother sitting down

  • 'cause you'll just stand up when you see this!

  • Tada!

  • Great barrier reef! That patty's spoiled!

  • [laughing]

  • Mr. Krabs, it's not tainted meat,

  • it's painted meat.

  • Pretty Patties! Available in six designer colors.

  • [laughing]

  • Mr. Squidward!

  • Come look!

  • Don't that look appetizing?

  • Mmm mmm. Good, sir.

  • [laughing]

  • Hey, let's check in on our taste test area.

  • Whoa!

  • This tastes kind of bad.

  • Would you buy it, though?

  • Well, yeah. For the convenience

  • and the face of that stupid guy.

  • Though, I have noticed a bit of a side effect.

  • Hmm hmm.

  • Oh!

  • [laughing]

  • He loves it.

  • That imposter wants a Krabby Patty,

  • then by Neptune will give him one!

  • You're dancing with the Krab Man now.

  • Join me, boy, or you're fired!

  • That doesn't seem right.

  • But it feels so good!

  • Seahorseradish, the gnarly stuff in the ocean.

  • Ooh! Hold on. I've got a jar of toenail clippings in my office!

  • Oops. I dropped it in the toilet!

  • Well, fish it out and I'll dry it with me gym socks!

  • [whimpering]

  • Why, that's the most diabolical Krabby Patty ever spawned.

  • I call it,

  • the Nasty Patty.

  • [laughing]

  • Squirrels can do anything they want to!

  • I bet you can't eat a Krabby Double Deluxe in one bite.

  • Give me that.

  • They don't call me cheeks for nothing.

  • [laughing]

  • SpongeBob!

  • What are you doing back here?

  • You expect the customers to eat this?

  • But now, thanks to you, they're leaving in boat loads!

  • Maybe this thing is out of ink.

  • [sighing]

  • No, boy, you're missing the point.

  • You can't make Krabby Patties with ink and paper.

  • You gotta put your heart into it, boy.

  • Now, get back to making them Patties the right way

  • and stop acting so dumb.

  • What you call dumb, I call normal.

  • Free Krabby Patties!

  • Step up! Step up!

  • You'll never get this chance again, folks!

  • Free Krabby Patties?

  • Oh, wow!

  • Hey, what's all the hubba?

  • Oh, didn't you hear? Someone's giving away free Krabby Patties!

  • That's it.

  • [laughing]

  • Hey, wait a minute.

  • Aren't you the same guy,

  • what was giving away them rotted chump samples before?

  • Uh, oh!

  • That wasn't me.

  • That was, uh, my brother-in-law.

  • Yeah, eh, Plankton.

  • Oh, okay.

  • Twelve Krabby Patties on wheat buns.

  • Bun, ketchup, tomato, bun!

  • One dozen crying cows on the farm!

  • Up!

  • Thanks, Farmer Brown.

  • SpongeBob!

  • Stop what you're doing.

  • But, Mr. Krabs, I'm not doing anything.

  • Never mind that now. I got some new direction for you.

  • Now, from now on, I want you to fry up two patties

  • for every Krabby Patty we sell.

  • One for the patty itself and the second just for the grease.

  • Then, slather the grease from the second patty

  • onto the first one

  • and voilawry,

  • the Deluxi Krabby Patty with extra flavor.

  • Mr. Krabs,

  • do you think it might be kinda unhealthy

  • to be feeding people all this grease?

  • Unhealthy?

  • Boy, didn't anyone ever tell ya?

  • Tell me what?

  • Questions are a danger to you...

  • and a burden to others.

  • Hey, how's that new Executive Treatment sandwich treating you?

  • 'Cause it's hitting all the quadrants of my hunger markets.

  • Mmm. Quadrants.

  • You know it reminds me of something I was saying

  • about business the other day.

  • The satisfaction earnings

  • of the fourth quarter of my lunch are off

  • the charts.

  • [laughing]

  • And I love the way it tastes.

  • [laughing]

  • And business, my friend,

  • is the business that I'm talking about.

  • Well, one can't have business without business, right?

  • Interesting point, Marv.

  • How's your sandwich?

  • Absolutely spectacular.

  • This new menu item is a business plan

  • I can really get behind.

  • I tell you, this is one dynamic little sandwich.

  • With levels of proactiveness that are off the charts,

  • business wise.

  • It really appeals to my demographic.

  • Well,

  • you are an executive in the fast-paced world of business.

  • Ha ha. That's for sure.

  • These guys talk funny words.

  • Oh yeah, they're a riot.

  • Why can I get you?

  • I guess I'll have one of these business sandwiches

  • everybody's talking about.

  • Ah, the Executive Treatment.

  • Is that what you call it?

  • Well, that's what Mr. Krabs makes me call it.

  • It's really just a Krabby Patty that costs more

  • and SpongeBob wears a different tie when he makes it.

  • Oh, wow! I'll take seven!

  • Oh, I'm sorry, sir.

  • The Executive Treatment is available to executives only.

  • I'm not sorry.

  • You remember Mr. Krabs.

  • He's the man who brought you that Krabby Patty!

  • [chatting]

  • And he's the man who brought you

  • the Double Krabby Patty and the Krabby Patty with cheese

  • and the Brownie Patty for kids.

  • Um, a little help here!

  • He also created a Chatty Patty for teens.

  • And who can forget the Hatty Patty?

  • The Patty you wear as a hat!

  • I wear it because I'm bald.

  • [humming]

  • Okay, everybody, order up!

  • Guess I'm used to cooking Krabby Patties

  • in mass quantities.

  • Welcome, wild ones!

  • They'll be drawn here like a sailor to a tattoo parlor!

  • With the special biker parking and authentic biker decor,

  • with real blood stains.

  • And, to top it off, a custom Chopper Patty!

  • And, best of all, I raised me prices 150%.

  • I make a fortune!

  • You think this is funny?

  • In a cosmic sorta way, yes.

  • Well, Mr. Funny Man.

  • Is this how you get your sick kicks?

  • What?

  • It's just an ordinary Krabby...

  • oh my goodness!

  • Squidward!

  • Ha!

  • Whoops.

  • Here you go, Squidward.

  • Now, what?

  • Oh, you're gonna love this, Spongy Patties!

  • Spongy Patties?

  • Yeah, I want you to start using 'em instead of the other ones.

  • Where'd you get them?

  • They were just the boxes of patties

  • we didn't have room for in the freezer.

  • They turned yellow.

  • Gotta keep those SpongeBob ice cubes somewhere, you know?

  • You mean to tell me you actually expect people

  • to pay $1.98 for a rotten patty?

  • Squidward, you're right!

  • This instant success must be scrambling my brains!

  • We'll make 'em $2.98!

  • [screaming]

  • Urchin!

  • That's no urchin. It's a Krabby Patty.

  • Yuck. A rotten Krabby Patty.

  • Wait, Squidward!

  • You can't throw out a Krabby Patty!

  • That is just wrong.

  • But this one is rotten.

  • Oh, simple Squidward.

  • No Krabby Patty can ever truly be rotten.

  • Here, look.

  • Ah!

  • SpongeBob?

  • Yes, Squidward?

  • I need a Triple Krabby Supreme on a kelp bun,

  • with extra sea pickle and... and burn it to a crisp, okay?

  • Coming right up!

  • Listen, Squidward.

  • I want to apologize for before.

  • I was only trying to make you happy.

  • Oh.

  • [mumbling]

  • [mumbling]

  • We don't all have to like the same thing.

  • Don't go.

  • While I strongly disagree with your decision,

  • I accept it.

  • You know, it's not often I get to make one like this.

  • I wanna see the look on their face

  • when they take that first bite.

  • Triple Krabby Supreme!

  • Triple Krabby Supreme!

  • Did somebody order a Triple Krabby Supreme?

  • One Monster Krabby Patty, please.

  • Hmm. No one's ordered a Monster Patty in ages.

  • SpongeBob, one Monster Krabby Patty.

  • [gasping]

  • Did you say a Monster Krabby Patty?

  • Um.

  • One Monster Krabby Patty.

  • [gasping]

  • Monster Krabby Patty?

  • Monster Krabby Patty?

  • Monster Krabby Patty?

  • Oh dear Neptune.

  • Oh boy.

  • We can do this.

  • At the count of three, we flip!

  • Ready? One, two, three!

  • [screaming]

  • No you don't!

  • [mumbling]

  • I'm not going into the tacky Krusty Krab!

  • You're right. We're going through the drive through!

  • [screaming]

  • Triple Krabby Patty with five scoops of ice cream, please.

  • [mumbling]

  • Sit down!

  • Squidward, you see me struggling with this boat

  • and you act like you don't care!

  • It's not an act.

  • [mumbling]

  • I hate to do this to ya,

  • Triple Krabby Patty with five scoops of ice cream,

  • but I have no choice.

  • Oh no, stop! I don't like that!

  • Ahoy there, Krusty Krab!

  • How can I help you?

  • Pizza? Hmm.

  • Of course, we have pizza!

  • Um, Mr. Krabs.

  • Our delivery squid will bring it right over.

  • Mr. Krabs, we don't serve pizza!

  • We don't deliver.

  • We don't deliver, but you do.

  • In all my years of fried cookery,

  • I have never seen such a lovely group of patties.

  • Especially...

  • you.

  • Such perfection.

  • From your little lettuce hair, to your rosie ketchup cheeks,

  • right down your mustard smile.

  • May I call you, Patty?

  • SpongeBob! I need that order of six!

  • Here you go, Squidward!

  • One and two and three and four and uh, five and six!

  • That's it. That's the whole order, Squidward!

  • Krabby Patties!

  • Brand new Krabby Patty recipe!

  • All new! All different!

  • All delicious!

  • Try it for free!

  • You can't be serious.

  • Uh.

  • I'm so hungry, I don't care.

  • I gotta eat something.

  • No!

  • Wait!

  • Let him go. It's too late.

  • All new free, Krabby Patties!

  • Hey, buddy, I'll try one.

  • What have I got to lose?

  • No!

  • Dear Neptune's gil sacks.

  • This is the best thing I've ever put in my mouth!

  • Where's the love?

  • SpongeBob!

  • What happened to the Krabby Patties?

  • I tried to tell them, but they wouldn't listen to me!

  • This is obscene!

  • Try again, shall we?

  • Order up!

  • [laughing]

  • Oh wait til you see,

  • this!

  • Yike!

  • Howdy, SpongeBob!

  • Sandy? What are you doing down here?

  • I'm moonlighting as a Molecular Gastronomist!

  • What? A ma letter in the gas a what-a-list?

  • Eugene here, is paying me to science up his menu.

  • Look, I'm in a hurry. You have this special project?

  • Well, it's a work in progress.

  • There it is!

  • Your new patty!

  • SpongeBob, ready for launch!

  • Mmm mmm.

  • Oh. Yum.

  • [moaning]

  • Oh yeah.

  • [groaning]

  • Hey, buddy.

  • What the heck is that?

  • Why, this is a hole, good sir.

  • You see, I am a sponge, and we typically...

  • Not that.

  • That!

  • It's just a little old Krabby Patty,

  • smothered in jellyfish jelly.

  • I call it a Krabby Patty with Jellyfish Jelly.

  • Could I try some?

  • Sure.

  • Amazing.

  • I've got to tell someone about this.

  • Hey all you people

  • Hey all you people

  • Hey all you people

  • Won't you listen to me? ♪

  • ♪ I just had a sandwich

  • No ordinary sandwich

  • ♪ A sandwich filled With jellyfish jelly

  • Hey, man! ♪

  • You've got to Try this sandwich! ♪

  • It's no ordinary sandwich! ♪

  • It's the tastiest Sandwich in the sea! ♪

  • Skee ba-da bob-a Doob-a dob-a dab-a dee dow

  • Yeah!

  • Thank you!

  • Mmm.

  • Mmm mmm mmm.

  • [snoring]

  • Order up!

  • [gasping]

  • What is that?

  • I call it a Rainbowger!

  • It contains all the colors of the rainbow.

  • it will bring the whole world together.

  • [crying]

  • You're fired!

  • And take your Noodle Patty with ya!

  • Oh, I'll take it, alright!

  • I'll take it to go!

  • Oh.

  • Hmmm.

  • There's something not quite right about this food,

  • but I'm not sure what it is.

  • Ah ha!

  • [belching]

  • Hey, where are those weenies?

  • [groaning]

  • Your weenie's, sir.

  • What in the name of Davy Jones' gym shorts are these?

  • They're Weenie Patties!

  • What are you, some kind of nut?

  • You've ruined my weenies!

  • You're fired!

  • I'll take a Double Triple Bossy Deluxe on a raft,

  • four by four, animal-style,

  • extra shingles with a shimmy and a squeeze,

  • light axle grease, make it cry, burn it, and let it swim.

  • We serve food here, sir.

  • I got it already, Squidward!

  • [gasping]

  • Bubble Bass.

  • Ow!

  • SquarePants.

  • I hear talk, you make a mean Krabby Patty.

  • Yep.

  • I hear talk, you're...

  • kinda picky.

  • What are we gonna do with all this green slop?

  • Mmm.

  • Freaky clown jelly relish.

  • Relish Patties!

  • Get your Freaky Clown Jelly Relish Patties!

  • Only four bucks extra!

  • Uh...

  • I'll have one Relish Patty.

  • Hold the mayo.

  • Huh? Oh no!

  • [screaming]

  • [gasping]

  • Oh, now, looky here.

  • Night Patties!

  • Now, you're getting the swing of it.

  • N-n-night Patties?

  • Order up, people!

  • - Alright! Night Patties! - That is tasty.

  • Smooth.

  • Smoky!

  • Attention! Get your Plankton and Krab's Patties right here.

  • Do you think it was a good idea to open in the dump?

  • What's that music?

  • I'd know that theme song anywhere!

  • It's Old Man Jenkins!

  • Old Man Jenkins!

  • I've just been searching for some new shoes for old Betsy.

  • You helped me Mom and me through some tough times.

  • It would be an honor if you'd be the first

  • to try our delicious burgers.

  • Why, I'd be happy to.

  • - Yeah! - Yay!

  • Huh?

  • It's a Krabby Patty.

  • Ewe. It's cold and hard.

  • This coulda rolled under there years ago.

  • There, there little one.

  • Your journey is almost over.

  • What happened?!

  • Someone tried to throw away a patty!

  • Pinch-O-Matic and saved you 5.2 cents.

  • But Mr. Krabs, I found that under the grill.

  • And tomorrow a customer will find it under his bun.

  • But it's old and cold and so very full of mold.

  • You're not to make another patty until that one is sold!

  • Understand?

  • Order up, Squidward.

  • Alright.

  • Ah, SpongeBob.

  • Can I get one with less... fog?

  • Sorry, Squidward. Mr, Krabs' orders.

  • Whatever.

  • Here you are, sir, one Krabby Patty.

  • [screaming]

  • I don't understand!

  • We haven't had a customer in weeks!

  • I wonder if it's the new place mats.

  • What? I... place mats?

  • Have you lost your mind?

  • It's that old patty you keep trying to sell to everybody!

  • it's gone bad!

  • Gone bad?

  • That's nonsense. Bring it here, SpongeBob.

  • Uh.

  • Why is it in a cage?

  • Because it growled at me.

  • [growling]

  • You two would have never have lasted in the Navy.

  • Let's see how bad you are.

  • [growling]

  • No!

  • No.

  • [growling]

  • Stay.

  • At a girl.

  • There, there.

  • See? Good enough to eat.

  • Oh.

  • Look. An ambulance.

  • Now, then.

  • [groaning]

  • Squidward!

  • What now?

  • I don't like crusts on my sandwich.

  • It's a bun. It's all crust.

  • How am I supposed to cut the crust off a bun?

  • Peel it.

  • Ugh!

  • Happy?

  • [giggling]

  • Here you go, sir.

  • A king size, ultra Krabby Supreme with the works,

  • double batter fried,

  • on a stick.

  • Thanks.

  • Barnacle Head.

  • Pardon me?

  • You forgot your mayonnaise.

  • Thanks.

  • Look at them eating that garbage.

  • It's disgusting.

  • They're sickening.

  • [laughing]

  • I can't believe how quickly

  • you inflated the whole city again, SpongeBob!

  • Yep, the whole city!

  • Plus, this new Krusty Krab.

  • Hee hee, ha, yeah!

  • Franchising's a great idea, boy-o!

  • I am making money claw over fist here.

  • Hey, what's the exchange rate for bubbles to real money?

  • There is none!

  • [laughing]

  • Exchange rate?

  • [laughing]

  • That's it. We're done here.

  • Huh?

  • [laughing]

  • Ah ha.

  • That delectable odor is coming from that shack!

  • Must know more.

  • The Flabby Patty?

  • Another restaurant.

  • Looks like Krabs has some real competition, huh?

  • Interesting.

  • Wow, a Flabby Patty.

  • T-minus three, two, one, lift off!

  • That was fantastic!

Holy Mother of all creatures, great and small!

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