And our co head writer Ian is out today.

Okay.

Which is probably why you're sensing a feeling of calm.

A feeling of joy.

It's because our co head writer Lauren Greenberg is sitting in what is today?

How are you?

Greenberg?

I'm good.

I'm good.

I'm good.

Can you hear me?

I can.

Okay, Yeah, I think this is great because like three people on twitter have tweeted at me, They don't know how television works and they say I should take over for you when the show ends, you should take over this job.

Three people thought that.

So, I think this is like a good start.

Well, I will say it is a good start because if three people thought that about you, zero people thought that about me before I got the job.

So you're already further ahead.

Yes.

Than I ever was.

We're thrilled you're here, Lauren bless you for being here.

Well, hey, we got two phenomenal dancers on the show today, Sierra, Jenna Dewan, let me correct that we've got three incredible dancers because Reggie Watts is also here, Reggie Watts phenomenal dancer.

It's almost difficult to tell anybody what you'll go to move is how would you describe your vibe on the floor?

You know those, those dolls that they collapse when you press press the base of them.

Yes, that's actually true.

That is what you do.

You've got a phenomenal fall down and back up.

And then a lot of like, like beach blanket, bingo vibes, you know, like twists like on the beach or something.

a lot of that.

Yeah.

Well I'm excited to professional dancers.

It's an absolute dance a thon tonight, guys, that's what it is.

It's a dancing.

Well it's that time it's time for the news And in an interview yesterday Dr.

Fauci was asked if he would serve under Donald Trump again, if he were to win election in 2020 for Fauci had this to say would you want to stay on in your post?

Ah well no thank you.

What he said was well know what he was thinking was hell no, probably for the best.

I think this probably trump needs a doctor whose background is more, you know, pro drinking bleach.

Fauci said he would not serve under Trump again but come on, Dr.

Fauci would be 83 years old.

The only thing he should be serving is margaritas on his back porch.

In other news, both Sweden and Finland announced plans over the weekend to pursue NATO membership.

And NATO is saying that they plan to fast track the process.

Sweden joining NATO would end 200 years as a neutral nation.

Look if Dr.

Fauci can end his neutrality so can Sweden here in the United States.

Congress says they hope to ratify the applications before going on holiday in august which is not fast tracking.

That's not fast tracking at all.

That's that's how you blow off someone you don't want to have a coffee with.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely, definitely do that.

Yeah, me and you, yeah, sometimes maybe, you know, three months from now a year and starting today, airline passengers will no longer have to wear masks on flights or in airports throughout the european union.

Yeah.

This should make things easier.

I know the french were always finding it tough.

You know, wear masks and smoke on a plane.

That's the, the EU advised that anyone coughing and sneezing should strongly consider wearing a face covering to reassure nearby travelers and I feel safer already.

And if any of you, Europeans out there are suddenly wondering what to do with all of the extra masks you've got fret not.

They actually make the perfect speedo to that.

No tan lines, no tan lines.

That's the way to do it.

You're a Speedo guy.

Pete I see you as a Speedo guy.

Your Speedo guy, surf trunks, surf trunks trunks.

Absolutely.

I bet marks a Speedo guy.

Mark your Speedo guy.

Of course he is.

Look at that straight up straight up.

I knew it.

Are you really, is that going to be you in Greece this summer?

I feel like a speedos most mark would, oh what come on.

I bet you don't even pack, you just put a speedo in each pocket.

That's it.

Speedo in each pocket and a suitcase full of condoms and here's a story.

A Rhode island woman has been banned from Tinder for life after the company discovered she was using the app to recruit people for her kickball team.

Yeah.

Tinder execs were like, how dare you use our app to form meaningful social bonds with friends.

Our product is for casual sex only Lauren, you, you've used dating apps.

Anyone, anyone ever tried to recruit you for something other than a date?

No, thankfully.

It's only been fixed.

How many picks on average?

Let me ask you guys guys just because I don't understand the pick.

I do not understand.

It makes me, it makes me realize that all men are trash.

Like I don't, I don't understand the notion of it.

I don't get it.

I do not get the thought process that goes, this will do it bang.

That should secure that.

So how, what's the fastest someone's engaged with you?

Like in a DM scenario and he picks arrived.

Um, I mean it's usually like, hey, what are you doing?

I'm just hanging out and then it's like, no!

Stop!

Stop.

Where is this woman?

This woman for a kickball.

She was sending kick picks.

Good night.

We'll see you tomorrow night.

Mm hmm.

And finally this was interesting.

Scientists have just discovered that fruit flies prioritize sex over survival.

It's true.

Even dying.

Males continued to search out interested mates.

I get it.

A fruit fly lives like what does it look like a week or two If you only had a few days to live, what would you do like?

It's not like they're growing older.

Moving on to like a sprawling beach house and having a triumphant second act like Diane Keaton in every movie.

Fruit flies prioritize sex over survival.

And you can tell the fruit flies that really prioritize sex, They all look like this.

Mhm.

And that's the news.

Everybody, I don't want to continue the show and go to break without word about the senseless, horrifying and racist shooting that happened in buffalo over the weekend, racism and guns two of the most abhorrent elements of the world we live in, combining for a tragedy that we will never forget.

Aaron Salter, Jr Ruth, Whitfield, Pearl, Young Kathryn Massey deacon, Haywood patterson, Cellasene, Cheney, roberta, drury Marcus Morrison, Andre McNeil and Geraldine tally lost their precious lives and we cannot begin to imagine what their family, what their friends and what those communities are going through right now.

We share in your confusion, anger and rage, that such horrific tragedies can occur Still today, our hearts and souls ache for you.

We'll be right back, everyone.

Mm hmm.