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  • Mhm.

  • We're going to go on a double date.

  • I'm excited.

  • We're going to get sushi first?

  • That's where we're meeting for lunch, We're gonna get eaten sushi and then we're going to go to the park.

  • A lot of people in the beginning, I didn't believe in us.

  • And today they still don't.

  • Less than one.

  • Don't listen to other people.

  • You'll be influenced by many.

  • Take this as a life lesson.

  • The more you listen to other's opinions of yourself, the more you create resistance in your head, the more resistance you feed your mind, the more you hold yourself back from being happy.

  • So just don't listen.

  • Unless whoever the person you're dating is hurting you physically or emotionally, just don't listen Right now and we're deciding what we want to eat.

  • It's such a beautiful day.

  • Today, we started out long distance, it was a test of emotions of ourselves.

  • A challenge.

  • I like a good challenge.

  • We didn't give up on each other and made every opportunity to connect on a daily basis.

  • Lesson two, no communication equals no relationship catching up on each other, sending dumb memes of dogs and cats throughout the day to make each other smile and laugh was what kept that fire going.

  • I didn't go a day without calling him.

  • We said good morning and we said goodnight, we Skyped weekly because we missed each other.

  • What's love if you don't miss each other's face.

  • So in Japan, they have these little knickknacks that you can buy restaurant family restaurants for kids or something like that?

  • Well it doesn't have to be for kids.

  • it could be for you.

  • Is this a back scratcher?

  • What the heck is this like a key chain back scratcher?

  • Anyway, we're going to go to the park, we just finished eating and now we're heading to, I can't even say it, kawa kawa kotaku and it's like the longest name ever.

  • And we're with, I don't know if you can see them, it's so bright if you guys don't know that we should check out their channel because they have a lot of tips, n tricks on international relationships and long distance and all that stuff and they just came out with a book.

  • Yeah, I can link it down below.

  • No, I know a lot of people on my channel, like especially like message me about our relationship and like how we got through long distance and how we got through uh being or how we're still getting through being an international couple.

  • So it's like good advice.

  • So I think that if you guys are interested, you guys can check that out.

  • Congratulations to them, releasing that book.

  • That's awesome.

  • They're amazing.

  • They're so cute.

  • It's my first day off in like a month.

  • I'm just like, I need to do something Kotomi thinks this looks like it does look like you Lesson three say I love you often.

  • Many times.

  • We tend to hide from our true feelings keep from feeling vulnerable and avoid pain and the unknown, but what that does to our brains is feed us more resistance by holding back our true feelings and not expressing emotion.

  • We have a hard time committing, understanding and being honest with ourselves in order to live truly.

  • We must feel I want you to make a very wonderful pose.

  • Mhm Like like this will you tell me a good fact about Japan?

  • An interesting fact about Japan I had to use for a wow that is a good fight.

  • Thank you lesson four.

  • Having alone time keeps the relationship fresh with all the time you make for someone.

  • You must give each other space to recharge, be with oneself and think or create alone by giving each other space.

  • We allow opportunities to give more to each other and the relationship.

  • Mm hmm They're like natural.

  • He doesn't need to do anything.

  • He's used to this.

  • He's taken so many couples photos.

  • Oftentimes people think of needing space as a negative thing.

  • But alas it is not.

  • It helps you maintain your individuality and immerse yourself spiritually.

  • How do you feel today baby?

  • You're super good.

  • Do you feel like a ninja all the way through the stone?

  • Was it hard?

  • Can you make a ninja pose?

  • Please?

  • Please please show me I need something better more far away.

  • You're so you're so quick.

  • Actually, I'm moving slowly back to super fast.

  • Oh he has an idea what is this place?

  • It's kind of creepy.

  • Right?

  • I don't know what this place is?

  • What is this?

  • This would be a good photo like right here, but like what is it?

  • Is it a room or a I'm not sure.

  • Let's go.

  • We're back in Tokyo Dome City.

  • I haven't been here in so long.

  • It's very refreshing.

  • We're thinking of going to the haunted house, so I think we're going to go check that out because it might be a little bit different this season.

  • Lesson five drop all expectations as an international couple.

  • We realized that we have our differences and learn something new about each other and our habits every day, having patience with each other and becoming an open minded human being has killed a lot of stress and misunderstandings in the relationship.

  • Alright, so we're going to go into a haunted house but I have to pee before because if I don't, I'm probably going to be my pants, I might scream really loud, let it all out.

  • You feeling right now, Which one of you can handle haunted houses more.

  • None of us, Not me.

  • Even though I've done this already, check out my video in the link below.

  • No spoilers, why we can do this.

  • I'll never know why.

  • Lesson six know your worth.

  • If someone doesn't make you happy most of the time if you feel down on yourself unmotivated, never seeing any effort made to speak to you, be intimate with you get to know you even from a distance or in an international relationship.

  • It's not worth the love you have for yourself.

  • Right wait we're on the fifth floor.

  • Right?

  • Let's see if he's there waiting at the end of the night and we're heading home and I'm kind of drunk but it's like a comfortable like I know I know my limit now.

  • Like if I were to drink more than this I probably wouldn't make it.

  • This is fun Drunk.

  • What are we doing here at the grocery store at almost 11 pm?

  • We need bananas.

  • This is drunk grocery shopping, this looks more green, this is what you want, you want the green bananas.

  • I want some Kimchi and some fruit.

  • Look at this fruit.

  • Dragon fruit is good.

  • I don't know we have some organic baby leave, you know what baby leave do I want this?

  • I want spinach, I want spinach drunk to know it.

  • And I am getting some salad salad, salad salad, there's a lot of salad on here at this hour.

  • Wait, come with me, please don't leave me this way drunk grocery shopping is easier than grocery shopping, introduce yourself.

  • Beautiful girl, wait, wait this is all I know how to make any relationship can have its ups and downs but different types of relationships such as long distance or international can have a lot more obstacles and challenges.

  • So I'd like to introduce you to some experts on the topic.

  • Hi everyone we are baby chan we are youtuber as well and we are focused mostly on international couple long distance relationship and a couple and we are married couple living in Japan and his french and Japanese.

  • Yes, so we're going to make this video only in english, but we are quite nervous of course, we're mostly talking in english, but we always mix with french and Japanese and all the time.

  • Our good friend kelly, ask us some advice how to be in a long distance relationship and some tips out to you know how to make it work actually, we are kind of focused on long distance relationship lately as a tips and advice.

  • We even wrote a book about it, so saying all of it in five minutes will be quite hard, but we're gonna try to give you like the most important advice.

  • So for me, the first tips that would give is quite easy, you need to make sure that you have the same idea of the relationship before going into exactly what are you searching for, Is it serious?

  • Is it casual?

  • Are you going to be able to see other people while she's gone or is it like something extremely serious?

  • What are you waiting for each other?

  • And it's, I'm done, but a lot of people don't do that and then after the surprise that something collapsed one of them is really serious, but another one is not going to make a really huge problem.

  • Exactly, so that would be the first, the first things to do, make sure you're on the same page, then second for me would be communication, you need to be extremely good at communication, especially if you are with japanese girl and like japanese people don't communicate often of course we do, but like less than like Western culture, so we always put the priority to communicate the most exactly, communication is very important and you need to force yourself to tell as much as you can for each other, especially about your feelings.

  • If you feel sad, you can tell it to your partner, communication is very important because you're gonna be aware and actually it's going to be the only things that you have, we need to talk about each other, we need to talk to each other about your feeling about what you're feeling, what's good, what's not good when you feel sad when you feel happy Sure, yeah, if you're not honest to your partner like relationship will never work because you will never know what your partner is thinking exactly, know and this communication brings to like I know the point that is very important, which is the mindset and mindset for me is super important and the mindset is you are a team, it's never you against each other, it's you together as a team is that is that the team, you know, but it's very important, you both look to the same direction, so when you're fighting, remember you're the same team, you are together, you are here against the problem together, not against each other.

  • So like when we fight of course both of you will be super emotional and you will have kind of misunderstanding in your mind that your partner is doing something really wrong and yourself is right, but this is not how you're gonna, you should think so you need to always think about what's the best for your couple because you're on the same page and you you want you want to make your relationship work.

  • So like you need to have a priority all the time to think about your couple, not about yourself exactly which it actually brings another point which is a priority.

  • Yeah.

  • If you're in a long distance relationship and you want it to work, it needs to be one of your if not the priority of your life in general.

  • So like when you were, when we were doing long distance relationship, like we always need to think about when to finish a long distance relationship, so when to meet each other next time.

  • So like we need to think about like really important, we need to think about the relationship as um as the most important thing of your life.

  • Otherwise like you're gonna put relationship aside, it will never work, you will never plan anything for the future and everything.

  • Long distance always needs to be temporary.

  • That's why it's so important to choose a name date, which is another tips.

  • Like we are focused, like we wrote a book on long distance relationship.

  • So we got so many things to say and it's quite hard.

  • But guys listen to kelly, she knows a lot as well.

  • Another thing from me is like, you need to have confidence about your relationship, it doesn't mean about being confident about yourself, but like you always need to think that this relationship will work.

  • Your partner will love you.

  • You love him so much.

  • So, so like for example, it helps to have a mindset that if he's going out with other friends, maybe I will feel jealous, but it doesn't mean it will affect our relationship because I know this relationship will work.

  • I know he loves me.

  • So this kind of confident about relationship itself is really necessary.

  • Yeah, I agree.

  • No, so I think you have it.

  • You know what?

  • I'm gonna put this here, define the relationship, put it as a priority.

  • Um have an end date, Be good at communicating, be honest with each other.

  • Have a good mind set of always being a team and be confident about your relationship already.

  • With all of this, you should be set up to have a good relationship and guys, you know joe and our youtube, we do a lot of video.

  • Everything is in english or in english subtitles, you can watch anything you want.

  • All right, thank you kelly for having us and see you guys very soon.

  • Back to you kelly.

  • Okay.

  • If you want to learn more about long distance and international relationships, check out Aurelian and Khatami's channel as well as their free guide and L.

  • D.

  • R.

  • Book in the link below.

  • Yeah.

Mhm.

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