and make a strong first impression

as I share my singing skills

with the famed Bikini Bottom Men's Chorus.

♪ La la la la ♪

But I needn't be too anxious,

for once they hear this master's voice,

they'll give me the lead solo for sure.

♪ Fi-ga-ro ♪

Now where are we going to get tuxedos from?

- You. - Hey, what are you--

Ew.

Ready to serve you, Miss Moneybag- I-I mean, ma'am.

Very nice. Here is your payment.

[screaming]

Squidward! We love you!

Love you, Squidward! You're our favorite!

[laughing]

Interesting.

"Original compositions wanted."

Me a famous composer?

Thank you. Thank you.

Ooh.

Honey, I'm scared.

[indistinct chattering]

[gasping]

Now to hang my masterpiece. Uh-huh.

[chuckles]

Huh?

Oh! I didn't know they had pin the tail on the sea donkey.

This place has everything.

[giggling]

Hey! No flash photography!

Phew. [chuckles]

[gasping]

Yah!

[braying]

The winner.

Did you see that guy?

Yeah. No running allowed! Let's get him!

[braying]

They're finally gone. [laughing]

[sighing] This almost makes

the other 353 days worth living for.

[gong banging]

For centuries, cephalopods had but one nemesis.

Let he among you who wishes to join the lodge face

your greatest fear. Cantankerous Moray Eelius!

[gasping]

Huh? [sighing]

[shivering]

I'll never forget my initiation ceremony.

[shivering]

[cheering]

[groaning]

Well, Mr. Squidward,

feeling better after your sick day?

You might say that.

[gasping] He's glorious.

That's right.

I used to be sick of everything, but I'm not sick anymore.

I've been plagued by toxins and stress,

built up over the years at this job,

but SpongeBob washed those away.

[yelping]

Now, who wants to order? [laughing]

SpongeBob? In art class?

Wait! This is cooking! Come back! You gotta be kidding.

[laughing] This is great!

You and me in school together. So, where's the teacher?

You're looking at him.

You are the teacher? To my pupil?

This isn't art class, it's Heaven.

Yeah. Grab a little piece of Heaven

and let's get on with it.

[meowing, yelping] Wha?

Sorry. Stepped on my tail.

What are you wearing.

I'm a cat burglar.

[purring]

Okay, I'll change.

[grunting]

Hang on.

And just how am I supposed to get in?

[groaning]

SpongeBob, what have you done with my clarinet?

Ooh, Squidward, you're so hard-boiled.

Are you playing a game? Oh, oh, can I play?

I know you stole my clarinet. Tell me.

I don't know. [laughing]

It couldn't have been me, Squidward, I have an alibi.

I was at Grandma's house all day,

and I had the kissie marks to prove it. See?

There's room for one more. [screaming]

His alibi was solid.

Only a family member could stomach

putting their lips on this foo.

You know, we have lots of friends.

Maybe they can help us find your clarinet.

I don't have friends. I have suspects.

Oh, Squidward. Don't you know a suspect is just a friend

you haven't cleared of charges yet.

Pssh, Squidward. Hey, Squidward.

SpongeBob.

[clearing throat]

Why you stop playing, Wolfgang Amadeus Tentacles?

Yes, Your Highness.

[laughing]

SpongeBob.

Hey! I have not instructed you to stop! Now play!

Now do tell me the one about the man from Peru again.

Sponge...

[gasping]

Bob.

I came here to hear beautiful music!

If I don't get my wish, it'll be your head!

[laughing nervously]

Look, Gary, it's on!

Oh, Jen, I've got a real problem.

What's your problem, Amy?

I've got all this money

and I don't know what to do with it.

And I'm hungry.

[Mr. Krabs laughing]

Who's there?

Where's that coming from?

[gasping]

Yippie! It's Mr. Krabs!

[whimpering]

[whimpering]

[whimpering]

[groaning]

[whimpering]

What can I get you, stranger?

Give me a shot... of milk.

Milk?

Two percent.

Think you can handle it?

I drink this stuff every day.

Over the lips and through the gums,

look out tape worm, here it come. Get ready, Tapey.

[laughing]

Ah.

[alarm ringing]

Oh, yeah! Smooth.

Okay, everybody.

Let's get this over with. One, two, three, four.

Ho ho ho! Ho ho ho!

Hello? Yes? Who's there? Huh? Hello? Show yourself.

Hoo! Hello? Who is it?

Up here, you dunce! I mean, uh,

Merry Christmas, little boy.

[grunting]

I'll show you high.

[grunting]

Huh? [screaming]

[sizzling]

[screaming]

Feel the burn.

I feel it!

[sighing]