Ourbrainsaredesignedtoprotectusfromthosethingsbecauseourbrainsaretryingtokeepusaliveandinordertochangeinordertobuild a businessinordertobethebestparent, thebestspousetodoallthosethingsthatyouknow, youwanttodowithyourlifewithyourwork, withyourdreams, you'regonnahavetodothingsthataredifficult, uncertainorscary, whichsetsupthisproblemforallofus, You'renevergonnafeellikeit.
Whatdoyouthinkthatis?
Oh I knowexactlywhythatisbecause I I'vestudiedthissomuchbecauseforme, oneofthehardestthingstofigureoutwaswhyisitsohardtodothelittlethingsthatwouldimprovemylife?
Thewaythatthatthatthatthisallhappensisitallstartswithsomethingsupersubtlethatnoneofusevercatchandthatiswiththishabitthatallofushavethatnobodyistalkingabout, Weallhave a habitofhesitating.
Wehaveanidea.
You'resittingin a meeting, youhavethisincredibleidea.
Andinsteadofjustyouknowsayingit, youstopandyouhesitatenowwhatnoneofusrealizeisthatwhenyouhesitatejustthatmoment, thatmicromoment, thatsmallhesitation, itsends a stresssignaltoyourbrain.
Itwakesyourbrainupinyourbrainallof a suddengoes, ohwait a minute.
Thosearedecisionswhat I doandwhat's changedmylifeiswakingupandrealizingthat I'm nevergoingtofeellikedoingthethingsthataretoughfordifficultoruncertainorscaryornew.
So I needtostopwaitinguntil I feellikeit.
Andnumbertwo, I amonedecisionawayfrom a totallydifferentmarriage, A totallydifferentlife.
A totallydifferentjob, A totallydifferentincome, a totallydifferentrelationshipwithmykids, notlikeonedecision, I'm divorcingyouinthemarriageexamplebutonedecisiononyouknowyoucouldbehaving a conversationwithyourspouseandyoufeelyouremotionsriseupandwithin a tinywindowthoseemotionscantakeoverandcanimpacthowyourmarriagegoes.
Oryoucanlearnhowtotakecontrolofthatmicromomentandmake a decisiontoactin a waythatactuallyshiftyourmarriage.
Getupontime, makebreakfastforthekids, getthemonthebus, startlookingfor a job, don't drinksomuchinsteadofisolatingyourself, pickupthephoneandcall a friend, getyourselfoutintothewoodsandgofor a walk, startrunningagain, likealltheselittlethingsthat I wascapableof, but I couldn't getoutofhere, couldnotgetoutofhereandifyou'restuck, that's theproblem.
Theproblemisyou'reinyourhead, you'rethinkingwhenyousetgoals, whenyouhaveanintentiononsomethingthatyouwanttochangeaboutyourlife, yourbrainhelpsyouwhatitdoesisitopensup a checklistandthenyourbraingoestoworktryingtoremindyouofthatintentionthatyousaid, andit's reallyimportanttodeveloptheskilland I saythatwordpurposefully, theskillofknowinghowtohearthatinnerwisdomandthatintentionkickinginandleaningintoitquickly.
Soforme, mybrainsayingthat's itrightthere, moveasfastas a rocketmel.
I wantedtochangemylifeand I thinkmostpeoplethataremiserableorthatare, thatarereallylikedyingtobegreatanddyingtohavemore.
Anyway, thenextmorningthealarmgoesoffand I pretendedNasawasthere.
It's thestupidestare I literallywent 54321, I countedoutloudandthen I stoodupand I'llneverforgetstandingthereinmybedroom, itwasdark, itwascold, itwaswinterinboston.
Andforthefirsttimeinthreemonths I hadbeatenmyhabitofhittingthesnoozebutton.
Therearetricksthatyoucanusethatactuallyoutsmartthetricksyourbrainplaysonyouinfurtheranceof a higherpurpose.
Weallknowthis, youcanrestrainyourselfifyou'rein a situationthatcallsforit, youcanjumpinto a ragingrivertosaveyourdogoryourkid, youcandirectyourselfinwaysifit's importanttoyou.
Thatisthatissomethingthat's proventohelpyoulearn a newhabit, thefivesecondrulewhenyourepeatitbecomes a startingritualthattriggersyoutoactwithconfidencethattriggersyouthatthisis a momentforcouragethattriggersyoutoshiftgearsandbecauseyou'vealsodonethemanualworkofawakeningthepartofthebrainthatyouneedtochange.
I thinkwe'reallflawedandthat's thebeautyofwhoyouareandinsteadoftryingtomakeyourselfperfectineveryarea, it's somucheasierwhenyouacceptthethingsthatyou'reterribleoratorthatareyourweaknessesorthatarethethingsaboutyourwiring.
And I don't careifyourdoctormartinLutherkingJRoryou'reMichelangelooryourlinManuelMirandawhowroteHamilton's youwillstrugglewithselfdoubtandeverybodythatyouadmireeverybody.
AndthelististhesamePrairie O OprahWinfreyand I wannabelike, youknow, tomand I wannabelike, youknowBransonand I wanttobelikejay z and I wantlikeeverybody's listenersas a BillGatesanddoyouknowwhatthosepeopledo?