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  • And now, ladies and gentlemen,

  • the moment you've all been waiting for.

  • We've saved the best for last.

  • Put your hands together for...

  • the incomparable Squidward!

  • [clapping]

  • [trumpets playing]

  • [ballet music playing]

  • [trance music playing]

  • What the...?

  • [booing]

  • I'm losing money on this deal!

  • It's worth every penny.

  • [booing]

  • You bottom feeders!

  • You don't even know talent!

  • [crowd chanting] No talent! No talent!

  • No talent! No talent!

  • Hey, Squidward, can I go on now?

  • Yeah, show's over!

  • [booing]

  • [crowd] Hey, yeah.

  • That's really not too bad, huh?

  • - I like that. - All right!

  • [cheering]

  • [cheering]

  • - We want more! - They want an encore!

  • Stand aside, SpongeBob!

  • [crowd] We want...

  • [silence]

  • [growling]

  • [cheering]

  • [silence]

  • [cheering]

  • [silence]

  • [cheering]

  • [silence]

  • [cheering]

  • [silence]

  • [cheering]

  • You did it, Squidward! What a great show!

  • Oh, my son's a star!

  • Who ever knew he had such talent?

  • I'll be needing another wheelbarrow

  • for next week's show!

  • [sighs]

  • [cheering] We want more! We want more!

  • Good evening and welcome

  • to the first annual Squidward Tentacles Talent Show,

  • sponsored by the Krusty Krab, home of the Krabby Patty,

  • because no one else would give it a home.

  • [laughing]

  • Ah, thank you!

  • Our next act is living proof that nepotism is alive and well.

  • [laughing]

  • Nepoti... [laughing]

  • [chuckles] Thank you!

  • Put your fins together for...

  • [laughing]

  • - Put your-- - [laughing]

  • - Put-- - [laughing]

  • Pearl.

  • [clapping] Hooray!

  • [clapping]

  • My little girl is finally a star.

  • Give me a K-R-U!

  • [loud thud, screaming]

  • Give me a S-T-Y!

  • [screaming]

  • Krusty Krab!

  • [screaming]

  • Krusty Krab!

  • [screaming]

  • Krusty Krab!

  • Now that's what I call talent!

  • Thank you!

  • My leg!

  • [groaning]

  • Thank you!

  • [laughs] Thank you!

  • [screams]

  • Hey, Squidward, listen. What do you think?

  • When I mop, should I go forward and back?

  • No, no. Wait. Side to side.

  • And now, poetry.

  • By Gary.

  • [clapping]

  • [clears throat]

  • Meow. Meow. Meow.

  • [sighs]

  • He has such a way with words.

  • Meow.

  • Come on, come on, Ginsburg. If he doesn't hurry it up,

  • we're not going to have time for the best act... me!

  • Squidward, should I use...

  • Mr. Cleanser or Dr. Clean?

  • Yes.

  • [clapping]

  • I, the amazing Plankton,

  • with the use of prestidigitation,

  • will make a Krabby Patty disappear

  • before your very eyes.

  • First, I'll need a volunteer from the audience.

  • [grunts]

  • Nice try.

  • Your act's over, bub.

  • You may win this time.

  • She-hah-kazing!

  • Well, this stinks.

  • [booing]

  • Boo!

And now, ladies and gentlemen,

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