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  • You could never pay me enough to act brotherly toward...

  • that guy!

  • Hmm...

  • [laughs]

  • [creepy laughter and groans]

  • [laughing]

  • P-P-Plaid?

  • Hey!

  • [clucking]

  • [crowing]

  • Well, you don't have to be nasty about it.

  • [clucking]

  • [sneezing]

  • Oh, who am I kidding, Gary?

  • I've got the suds, no doubt about it.

  • [sniffling]

  • [sneezes]

  • I'd better take care of this before it gets out of hand.

  • [snarling]

  • What are you doing in here, boy?

  • You're wasting all me food!

  • Boy?

  • [shouting like a caveman]

  • Oh, hey, Mr. Krabs.

  • When did you get in here?

  • Is there something wrong with me?

  • [screaming]

  • I've soiled the good Krusty Krab name!

  • Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!

  • Soiled it! Soiled it! Soiled it!

  • Onion juice! [screams]

  • Come on, SpongeBob! Chop, chop!

  • Okay, okay!

  • Ah!

  • [sizzling]

  • Ow!

  • I can't do it.

  • I can't do it, Squidward.

  • What?

  • Every sentence! Every paragraph!

  • Spoons! Bread! Salad! Pepper!

  • Don't you understand?!

  • My brain is full to bursting!

  • If I have to memorize a single order,

  • I think I'm gonna explode!

  • [groaning]

  • [laughing]

  • [grunting softly]

  • What?

  • [grunting softly]

  • What's the matter with you?

  • All I said was a little too much sauce.

  • It's no big deal, really.

  • [grunting softly]

  • What do you think of this?

  • [laughing]

  • What's wrong, SpongeBob?

  • Patrick, I think we're on the wrong...

  • [screaming]

  • bus!

  • Huh?

  • Good Neptune, you're hideous!

  • You too, but somehow you still retain your allure.

  • [chuckles]

  • [mumbling incoherently]

  • SpongeBob?

  • There, there, kid. What's the big deal?

  • I am Squidward.

  • Huh? Mr. SquarePants,

  • obviously, you have subconsciously internalized

  • Mr. Squidward's problems as your own.

  • When I snap my fingers,

  • you'll realize you are not Squidward.

  • You are SpongeBob,

  • and your desire to bite your nails

  • will, poof, disappear!

  • I call this one...

  • The Gary! Meow!

  • Barnacles, this hurts!

  • [panting in pain]

  • Conch-shelled manatees, this is painful!

  • [panting]

  • [crying]

  • Oh, may I?

  • [chuckles] Tough mallows.

  • I gotta find out what's in that secret box!

  • I'm not gonna rest till I do!

  • And why are you sweating so much?

  • And why do you look so hungry?

  • And...

  • No, no. Wait, it's not what you think.

  • This is a big misunderstanding.

  • You've got to believe me! I...

  • Listen, I am telling you!

  • You better listen to me, SpongeBob!

  • You like Krabby Patties, don't you, Squidward?

  • Huh?

  • No! No, no!

  • No! No! No!

  • Not the patties!

  • I'll save you!

  • [inhaling]

  • You want me to run down to the store

  • and buy Mrs. Puff something she doesn't need!

  • Then you want me to run back here so you can say,

  • [imitating Krabs] Arr, SpongeBob!

  • You're spending all me money!

  • And then I'll say,

  • But Mr. Krabs, I'm only doing what you said!

  • [crying]

  • No! Squidward!

  • You didn't tell me I was gonna get fired!

  • Without the Krusty Krab, I...

  • I...

  • [crying] Squidward!

  • Can you hold me?

  • Five...

  • Four...

  • Three...

  • Two...

  • One!

  • Now make me 10,000 patties!

  • And no breaks!

  • Did you hear that, spatula?

  • You, me, and 10,000 Krabby Patties!

  • And the best part,

  • no breaks!

  • Wha-hao!

  • Oh, so this is the thanks I get for working overtime.

  • Overtime?!

  • - [laughing] - SpongeBob!

  • Why aren't you manning the fryer?!

  • Trying out a new look with your face?

  • I like it!

  • Oh, Patrick, I can't stop biting my fingernails!

  • I gotta be more diligent.

  • I am not leaving this spot no matter what!

  • [roaring]

  • Do something, SpongeBob!

  • [panting]

  • [making silly noises]

  • Look at the funny face!

  • [making silly noises]

  • Look at the funny face!

  • [sobbing] Look at the funny face!

  • Hm?

  • Don't worry, Mr. Krabs,

  • as long as these Pants are Square,

  • and this Sponge is Bob,

  • I will not let you down!

  • So this is my crew.

  • You get a little tired, and a wee-bit hungry,

  • and you want to shove off for home!

  • [slurping]

  • Ah...!

  • That's a pretty cool face!

  • You just walk around... randomly.

  • Well, that's how I usually get around.

  • [laughs like Krabs]

  • How's that?

You could never pay me enough to act brotherly toward...

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