The houses acted.

Now it's in the hands of the Senate.

The president is prepared to sign it.

This aggressive push is really disturbing this moment of peace between mass shootings.

Yeah, the last thing we want to do is increase the number of victims by putting pressure on Senator Joe Manchin.

Now, Governor, your state of New Jersey has strict gun control laws.

Are we just supposed to take your word that these laws are effective just because you have data to back it up?

Yes, Sarah, we do have among the strongest gun safety laws of any state in America.

And while we're proud of that, it has clearly made a difference.

There is nothing like national gun safety laws.

Too many, for instance.

Too many guns still come into our state from other states that have more lax laws.

Now I've got to say I'm deeply concerned Democrats might end the filibuster and pass gun reform.

I use preventable mass shootings as a regular reminder to take my fiber supplements.

What will you do, you'll have to set an alarm on your phone.

Don't even joke.

Now moving on.

President Biden has unveiled a $3 trillion infrastructure spending bill to close the income inequality gap.

I'm sorry.

What in the absolute fuck is going on in the White House?

Yeah, no shit.

Joe Biden is passing all sorts of progressive priority is acting like a sober FDR.

You know, we specifically pushed Bernie Sanders out of the primary, so we didn't have to deal with this crap.

Listen to this shit I read about Biden quote.

He loves emphasis.

There's the growing narrative that he's bolder and bigger thinking than President Obama.

I was assured Biden was a Wall Street shill, keeping the seat warm until we got Mike Bloomberg in their governor.

You must know Biden have the poor hypnotized him with one of their dances.

I have known President Biden for a long time.

Uh, and I'm a huge fan, and I think he's doing a great job.

The American rescue plan, which has passed Congress and been signed by the president, is going to be a game changer.

And then, of course, as you as you rightfully point out.

We now have the potential for a very large infrastructure package.

God, he's right.

There's no fighting this.

We just have to start an infrastructure company and surrender to the government.

Windfall.

Daddy, I can hear your heart racing from here.

What are you drawing?

There's the logo for our construction company that's inscrutable.

Steady.

Are you in or out?

I'm in Jesus, Goddamn right.

You are well incorporated in Delaware and buy some metal doodads at a Truckee thing to be plowed.

Governor, we'll start welding beams.

Just tell us what we need to turn it into in the next five seconds.

Roads, bridges, railways, tunnels, offshore, wind.

That's too many things.

Governor turning now to the only workplace struggle that's captivated the nation, employees at Goldman Sachs claim they were quote inhumane hours.

According to a leaked Power Point presentation.

The CEO gave the young staffers a pacifier to suck on, releasing a voice memo saying he will strengthen enforcement of the Wall Street Giants Saturday rule, which means that employees cannot work from nine PM Friday to 9 a.m. Sunday except in certain circumstances.

No word yet on what certain circumstances means, but we're assuming It's if a teacher's pension fund needs to be strip mined now.

Governor, you worked for Goldman Sachs for 23 years.

Can you assure worried shareholders that if Goldman treats workers humanely, that will not translate to its business practices?

I've been out there for a long time, but I will say this life, any job, uh, is a is a marathon, not a sprint and taking care of yourself.

Getting a good night's sleep at least one or two nights a week is essential, and you just got to pace yourself.

He's a good night's sleep.

Now.

We know why he couldn't hack it at Goldman and had to become governor.

Uh, you know, after college, I became a Goldman Sachs analyst, and I never left my desk.

I had to custom order expanding rubber suit pants because I soiled myself every day.

But goddamn it, I had my colleagues respect.

Well moving on.

Just hours after AstraZeneca declared their vaccine 79% effective at making their stakeholders a shit ton of money, medical experts cited with covid and accused them of cherry picking data.

Here's Biden, chief medical advisor and number one on IMDB Star Meter Dr Anthony Fauci, if you look at the data really are quite good.

But when they put it into the press release, it wasn't completely accurate.

At the end of the day, Robin, all of this is going to be decided by the FDA.

Expecting every drug from a drug company to work is just purity politics, and we're not having it.

So what if this vaccine is just chicken soup with some green food coloring to make it look special?

No respectable pharma giant has a Wikipedia controversy section that you can scroll through in less than five minutes.

Governor, given its questionable effectiveness, which regions of New Jersey will you be sending AstraZeneca to?

I will say this.

We've got three extraordinarily effective vaccines in our state right now.

We've already put three point almost 3.7 million shots into arms and, you know, each day we're putting tens and tens of 1000 more shots in our rollout is proceeding, Governor, because you've been more effective than your neighbor Andrew Cuomo at slowing the spread of the coronavirus in your state.

We've gone ahead and written this book for you called American Crisis.

How I stopped the covid crisis in my state forever.

And this book is a great idea by Governor Phil Murphy.

Now, we put sheets over the Barnes and Noble displays, but people have been peeking.

So are you ready to get this book out there and make a buck or two?

I'm good.

I'm not in the book business.

And don't expect to be for quite some time, but I appreciate the thought.

Well, you're missing a huge opportunity to look like a huge jackass.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.