GET THE COVID-19 VACCINE AND HOW TO SIGN UP, CREATING A LOT OF

PUBLIC CONFUSION.

>> PEOPLE WANT TO KNOW, "WHEN ARE WE GOING TO HAVE ENOUGH

PEOPLE VACCINATED SO WE CAN GET BACK TO LIFE AS WE KNOW IT?"

>> A FORMER WISCONSIN PHARMACIST HAS AGREED TO PLEAD GUILTY WITH

TAMPERING WITH HUNDREDS OF DOSES OF THE MODERNA COVID-19 VACCINE.

BRANDENBERG ADMITTED TO BELIEVING IN "CONSPIRACY

THEORIES" AND SAYS HE WAS SCEPTICAL OF THE MODERNA

VACCINE.

>> HEAR YE, HEAR YE, ON THIS SECOND DAY OF FEBRUARY,

CORONAVIRUS KENNY HAS EMERGED FROM HIS BURROW, WHERE HE'S BEEN

HIDING SINCE LAST MARCH JUST TO SOCIALLY DISTANCE FROM THE OTHER

WOODLAND CREATURES.

THIS PROGNOSTICATOR OF PROGNOSTICATION WILL PREDICT

WHEN YOU WILL RECEIVE YOUR COVID VACCINE.

IF CORONAVIRUS KEN SEES HIS SHADOW, YOU HAVE TO WAIT SIX

MORE MONTHS FOR A VACCINE.

IF HE DOESN'T SEE HIS SHADOW, YOU STILL HAVE TO WAIT SIX

MONTHS TO GET THE VACCINE.

NOW, IF HE SEES THREE-FOURTHS OF HIS SHADOW, IT'S AN OLD-PERSON

THUNDERDOME: TWO OLDS ENTER, ONE OLD LEAVES, VACCINATED.

LET'S SEE WHAT THE IMMUNOLOGIST OF IMMUNOLOGY HAS TO SAY.

AND... TURNS OUT HE'S AN ANTI-VAXER.

LET'S TURN HIM INTO A HAT.

WHERE DID HE GO!

HE'S GETTING AWAY!

♪ ♪ ♪

>> Announcer: IT'S "A LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT."