Name: How Mark Dohner Overcame His One-Pump Chump Status - Sex Fails
Uploaded: 2021-01-28T00:10:43.000Z
Duration: 6 min 47 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

And this is the story of how I used to be a one pump chunk That was me finishing.

Adverbs of degree

So, you know, through the years I've had some funny sex stories, but I think the best ones are the ones where I've gotten a little bit too excited before.

Literally any touching took place, So just give you like a backstory.

My dad was super Catholic, super religious.

He never gave me the talk like, don't have sex.

All my friends were telling me how they watched porn and beat their meat three times a day.

Yeah, and I'm like, Yeah, man, Dude is crazy, like, all day, every day, all night, dude.

But in reality, I'd never even done that.

I've never watched porn because I didn't have a computer that had Internet, so didn't know what porn Waas didn't know.

That's, you know, the basis of my sexual education and then fast forward to high school senior year.

All these kids were hooking up and I'd never done anything before.

And we're over at her house when her parents were in the other room.

And I knew we were gonna, like, do stuff.

Like when I was, you know, in these hook up stages, I was nervous to the point where, like, my legs were shaking and like my body heat would go down, I would get freezing and just be so fucking nervous to hang out with Girls were sitting there on the couch, making out and watching TV, and then she's reaching her hands down my pants.

I'm like, Oh, God through this is fucking crazy.

Like I'm, like, trying to clinch my legs together, something so she doesn't like I don't blow.

Then she lip dude fuck, man, She literally guys, I'm not even kidding you.

She puts her hand toe go in my pants, doesn't even go in my pants.

And I'm like, I stopped her and I literally I creamed my pants, man.

I'm like, I gotta go to the bathroom, so I run into her bathroom.

Like what if there's like, a load on my shorts?

It's still a little moist and shit, and I'm like, walking out there.

It's like, I get back in the room, shut the door, and I'm like, Where were we?

You know, you're readyto last, and she was like, she had no idea, right?

She didn't have any idea that I blew my load.

I don't know if you're watching this comment down below, but we start going at it again.

I'm like, Dude, I've never liked busted a nut twice and like, you know, back to back.

Like you need to have that refractory period.

Hand goes down there and your boy just blew his load keep in mind.

I'm not even talking sex like I wasn't bringing a condom over anything.

So I stopped her, called the night short, and that was the end of that.

We never actually know what I actually ended up one time getting that that b j don't know why that fucking matters.

I don't know, but anyways, the story does not end there.

So I wanted to lose my virginity, this chick, but she didn't want to do it, so I was like, All right, I'm going to college.

So I hit up this girl in my neighborhood, right?

She was the great below me, and I was like, Hey, look, I'm going to college this year.

How about we don't be virgins and she's like, I'm down?

Me especially nervous because I'm the one pump chump without even doing a pump.

I think it was after school one day, and we're in the basement, right?

I pull out the condom, I put the condom on, I go and we're going to hook up and stuff, and I put it in, and she's like, Oh, e like, what's wrong?

I pulled it out and I fucking finished in the condom.

I put it in one fucking time one time, like there was no foreplay.

We didn't even really make out and shit were so nervous.