Name: Jim Gaffigan Stand-Up Special | The Pale Tourist | Prime Video
Uploaded: 2021-01-27T20:26:20.000Z
Duration: 8 min 51 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

And I tell you, I don't feel like I was ready.

I don't know how big I thought a moose was gonna be, but I was way off.

And I feel like I should have been warned.

Like someone should have been like, you might see a moose get ready.

But my friend was like, You might see Mos have fun like it was a butterfly or something.

Are they shooting a Star Wars movie up here?

How many people are in that most costume?

And then my friend was like, Don't get close.

At that moment I realized my moose knowledge didn't exist.

I knew nothing about moose like my most knowledge comes from cartoons in cartoons, Mr Like Hey, how you doing?

The oh, But in real life, like I gotta kill you How did that translate?

Never hear Moose in those animal songs, right?

The cow goes moo The cat goes me out, the moose goes, I'm gonna stop you Toe death Those don't heir's heir.

You know, that's that's spicy meat with that sweet sauce which I'm almost positive is just melted ice cream.

I'll have a don't air making cookies And Craig, don't air me.

I don't I still can't find out what it iss.

It's like, you know, dancer and Prancer and don't air and blitz.

And but do you recall the most tasty diarrhea causing meat of all?

I'm convinced that the don't air was just created so we can digest poutine, right?

Doctors like I'm gonna prescribe you a don't air figured of work.

I'm also going to give you a prescription for a diaper.

Very important you put the diaper on before you eat the donation.

But you know poutine it's a little irresponsible.

Yeah, It's almost like someone was just trying to make French fries mawr unhealthy.

What if we cover and everything that causes heart disease?

Do you know that poutine and French means Vladimir Putin?

I'm just saying, I have to admit I'm a little disappointed by the number of Tim Hortons in town.

There's some, but you go, you go to some cities in Canada and the number of Tim Hortons.

It is uncomfortable, like your drive by the fifth one.

Are we sure they're only selling coffee and doughnuts?

You guys are always like, That's our Dunkin Donuts.

Yeah, in America, we don't have Duncan Donuts on every block.

Tim Hortons is like America's stop sign Now.

Now there's I've seen some Tim Hortons in American.

Whenever I see a Tim Hortons in America, I always have the same thought.

So there's bound to be some Americans that threatened to move to Canada if if that person gets elected I'm moving to Canada.

I don't remember Canada extending an invitation.

Yes, it's like and I've been coming to Canada for years.

I remember the first time I came to the Canada.

The big difference I noticed was that, uh, things were measured differently, right?

And remember, at the time being like, Well, that's annoying.

Then eventually, I realized it wasn't just Canada.

Okay, that uses the metric system except for us.

Is an American to realize every other country on the planet was wrong?

Right on should change for us because we all know God loves America more and that love is measured in feet.

Yeah, I do love doing international shows.

I know you guys were all fans of his, but no, it's different with Trump.

It's It's kind of like having a parent that's an alcoholic show up in a country like sorry about my dad the O Canada.

The further east you go, the crazier it gets like Newfoundland is like Barbara Brand Burn, Ma'am.

Newfoundland is like the crazy uncle that you don't introduce to friends until you've known that for a long time.

E don't want them to think I'm like, I'm No.