Placeholder Image

Subtitles section Play video

  • ♪♪♪ >> Stephen: HEY EVERYBODY, LET'S

  • SAY HELLO TO OUR FRIEND JON BATISTE.

  • JON, YOU AND THE BAND SOUND GREAT IN THOSE BUMPERS.

  • I NEED THE ENERGY.

  • YOU GUYS ALWAYS BRING THE JOY.

  • HOW ARE YOU DOING?

  • IT'S A VERY DARK TIME.

  • >> Jon: YOU KNOW WHAT?

  • IT'S NINE DAYS TILL INAUGURATION, BUT I KEEP

  • THINKING, WE HAVE YEARS AND YEARS AND YEARS OF WORK TO DO,

  • SO I'M TRYING TO BUILD MYSELF UP TO DO THE WORK.

  • THAT'S HOW I'M DOING.

  • >> Stephen: WELL, IF YOU FIGURE OUT WHAT THE WORK IS,

  • PLEASE GIVE ME AN ASSIGNMENT.

  • IN THE MEANTIME, DO YOU HAVE ANY MORE OF THAT -- DO YOU HAVE ANY

  • MORE JOY IN YOUR FINGERTIPS YOU CAN SHARE WITH AMERICA?

  • >> Jon: OH, MY GOODNESS, ALWAYS.

  • ♪♪♪ >> Stephen: THANK YOU, JON.

  • JON BATISTE, EVERYBODY.

  • MY GUEST TONIGHT IS AN ACTOR, WRITER, DIRECTOR AND COMEDIAN.

  • PLEASE WELCOME TO "A LATE SHOW," CHRIS ROCK!

  • HELLO, CHRIS ROCK.

  • >> WOW!

  • NO MUSIC, NOTHIN'!

  • >> Stephen: NOPE.

  • NOPE.

  • >> NOTHIN'!

  • >> Stephen: NO.

  • WELCOME TO THE DESERT.

  • >> WOW!

  • THOSE CHARLIE ROSE PILLS ARE KICKING IN, MAN!

  • ( LAUGHTER ) WOW!

  • >> Stephen: MM-HMM.

  • IT'S LONELY OUT HERE.

  • >> WHOA HOA, HOA!

  • >> Stephen: DO YOU KNOW WHAT THE WEIRDEST PART IS?

  • AFTER TEN MONTHS, IT STOPS FEELING WEIRD.

  • THAT'S WHEN YOU KNOW YOU'RE IN TROUBLE.

  • THIS FEELS NORMAL NOW.

  • >> YOU INTERVIEW GORBACHEV?

  • WHAT'S GOING ON?

  • >> Stephen: IF WE PLUNGED EVERYTHING IN DARKNESS, WE WOULD

  • DO THAT.

  • THIS IS WELCOME TO "THE LATE SHOW"'S TINY DESK CONCERT WITH

  • STEPHEN COLBERT AND CHRIS ROCK.

  • >> YES.

  • >> Stephen: CHRIS, I'M SO HAPPY TO HAVE YOU ON.

  • I'VE NEVER HAD A CHANCE TO INTERVIEW YOU BEFORE.

  • THANKS FOR BEING HERE.

  • >> REALLY?

  • >> Stephen: NEVER.

  • WE'RE BOTH FROM SOUTH CAROLINA, IF THAT MEANS

  • ANYTHING.

  • >> Stephen: I DON'T KNOW IF THAT DOES.

  • LET'S INTO THAT FOR A SECOND.

  • I DON'T KNOW IF THAT MEANS ANYTHING.

  • PEOPLE SAY YOU MUST KNOW CHRIS ROCK, HE'S FROM SOUTH CAROLINA.

  • I SAID, HE LEFT WHEN HE WAS PRETTY YOUNG AND, B, THE PEOPLE

  • WHO SAY THAT HAVEN'T SPENT MUCH TIME IN SOUTH CAROLINA.

  • THEY DON'T UNDERSTAND THERE ARE TWO VERY DIFFERENT

  • SOUTH CAROLINAs.

  • >> VERY DIFFERENT.

  • >> Stephen: DO YOU KNOW THE STATE MOTTO.

  • >> WHAT IS THE STATE MOTTO, STEPHEN?

  • >> Stephen: IT IS DOOM SPIRO SPARROW, WHILE I BREATHE, I

  • HOPE.

  • >> OKAY.

  • >> Stephen: THAT'S NOT TOO BAD.

  • ONE OF THE THINGS I INTRODUCED YOU AS IS A WRITER, DIRECTOR,

  • PRODUCER AND COMEDIAN.

  • WHICH OF THOSE IS MOST IMPORTANT TO YOU?

  • YOU HAVE TO PICK ONE.

  • >> CAPRICORN.

  • >> Stephen: OKAY.

  • NO.

  • COMEDIAN.

  • COMEDIAN IS MY, YOU KNOW, I MEAN, I'M IN THE TOP 20, WHERE I

  • WOULD BE IN THE TOP 700 ACTORS.

  • SO I WOULD RATHER BE, YOU KNOW --

  • >> Stephen: AND THE COMEDY LEADS TO EVERYTHING ELSE.

  • THAT'S THE NUCLEAR REACTOR THAT DRIVES THE WHOLE MACHINE.

  • >> YES, HARD DOING COMEDY RIGHT NOW.

  • >> Stephen: IT IS.

  • THOUGH I SAW YOUR SPECIAL, AND TOTAL BLACKOUT, AND I WAS VERY

  • GRATEFUL FOR IT.

  • >> THANK YOU.

  • >> Stephen: IT'S FROM SOMEWHAT TO HAVE THE BEFORE TIMES.

  • IT'S NOT FROM THIS MOMENT RIGHT NOW.

  • >> NO.

  • >> Stephen: BUT I WAS GRATEFUL YOU WERE ABLE TO BE IN FRONT OF

  • AN AUDIENCE.

  • I LOVED HEARING THAT LAUGHTER.

  • >> GOD GOD, I CAN'T WAIT, MAN!

  • I CAN'T WAIT!

  • IT'S HARD DOING COMEDY.

  • GOVERNMENT MUMFORD & SONS TAKING OVER THE CAPITOL.

  • I'M, LIKE, IS THAT WINSTON?

  • THAT'S WINSTON!

  • WOW!

  • IT'S CRAZY, JUST THE WHOLE COUNTRY'S JUST LOSING IT!

  • DID YOU SEE PELOSI ON "60 MINUTES" LAST NIGHT WHEN

  • THEY ASKED HER ABOUT A.O.C.?

  • WHOA!

  • IT WAS LIKE ASKING NIKKI MY IMAGINE A CARDI B -- NICKY

  • MINAGE A CARDI B QUESTION.

  • EGOT PLENTY OF EMCEES!

  • FEELING REALLY OLD AND RICH RIGHT NOW.

  • AND THEN PICKING UP THAT GIRL, MIA PONSETTO.

  • >> Stephen: THE ONE THAT GAYLE INTERVIEWED ABOUT THE PHONE?

  • >> YEAH, GUESS WHAT?

  • I GOT YOUR PHONE, BITCH!

  • >> Stephen: IT WAS YOU?

  • IT WAS ME!

  • I TOOK IT AND I'M NEVER GIVING IT BACK!

  • >> Stephen: ONE TO HAVE THETOMICS YOU COVER IN YOUR IN

  • EFFECT SPECIAL IS THE WAY -- I MEAN, WE'VE TALKED ABOUT THIS

  • FOR YEARS, BE UH THE WAY BLACK PEOPLE ARE TREATED BY POLICE,

  • AND WHEN YOU LOOK AT -- COMPARE THE "BLACK LIVES MATTER"

  • PROTESTS AND HOW THEY WERE TREATED AND HOW THE TROOPS WERE

  • BROUGHT OUT TO PROTECT THE LINCOLN MEMORIAL FROM BLACK

  • PROTESTORS, AND THERE WERE TANKS IN THE STREETS OF VARIOUS TOWNS

  • INCLUDELE THE CAPITOL OF THE UNITED STATES, AND THEY WERE

  • SHOOTING TEAR GAS AND RUBBER BULLETS, AND THEN YOU SEE THERE

  • IS THIS LIGHTWEIGHT REACTION TO ARMED MILITIAS, WHAT DOES THAT

  • MAKE YOU THINK?

  • >> YEAH, WITH "BLACK LIVES MATTER," THEY HAD, LIKE, APACHE

  • HELICOPTERS, AND FOR THIS THERE WAS FOOD TRUCKS OUTSIDE!

  • IT WAS, LIKE, THEY WERE SELLING BURRITOS!

  • I WAS, LIKE, WHAT WAS GOING ON?

  • IF POPCORN WAS BLACK, THEY'D NOT SELL IT IN THE MOVIE THEATERS.

  • YOU COULD SAY THAT.

  • IF FRUIT WAS BLACK, YOU WOULD NOT PUT WHIPPED CREAM ON IT!

  • WHATEVER!

  • IF EMINEM WAS BLACK HE WOULD BE SACKING GROCERY.

  • >> Stephen: I'LL MOVE ON TO THE NEXT QUESTION.

  • I HAVE A SLIGHT BONE TO PICK WITH YOU.

  • >> WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO PICK WITH ME, STEPHEN?

  • >> Stephen: THIS RIGHT HERE.

  • THIS PHOTO FROM LAST FALL.

  • DO YOU SEE THAT?

  • >> OH, YEAH.

  • >> Stephen: WE ARE ESSENTIALLY THE SAME AGE.

  • A, I DON'T BELIEVE A MAN IN HIS 50s SHOULD HAVE ABS, AND, B, I

  • FIND IT OFFENSIVE FOR A COMEDIAN TO BE SEXY.

  • WHAT IS THE MEANING TO HAVE THIS, SIR?

  • ANSWER FOR YOURSELF.

  • >> EVERYTHING YOU JUST SAID, I DON'T KNOW HOW IT GOT THERE.

  • I LEARNED HOW TO SWIM THIS SUMMER.

  • >> Stephen: OH.

  • O IT WAS KIND OF LIKE ONE OF THESE WEIRD THINGS.

  • IT WAS JUST A PRODUCT OF SWIMMING.

  • >> Stephen: I ACTUALLY -- I WAS ACTUALLY NOT SURPRISED BY

  • YOUR ABS, BECAUSE I'VE SEEN YOUR ABS.

  • I'VE SEEN YOUR ABS IN PERSON.

  • DO YOU WANT TO KNOW WHERE THAT IS?

  • >> WHERE?

  • >> Stephen: I WAS AT A VERY NICE RESORT A FEW YEARS AGO,

  • DOWN IN THE CARIBBEAN, AND IT WAS A BRAND-NEW RESORT, AND I

  • DIDN'T KNOW IF IT WAS ANY GOOD, AND I'M SITTING THERE ON THE

  • BEACH WITH MY FAMILY AND I LOOKED DOWN THE PEACH WITH AND I

  • THOUGHT, OH, THIS MUST BE A VERY GOOD RESORT BECAUSE THAT'S CHRIS

  • ROCK ABOUT TEN CHAIRS AWAY FROM ME WITH AN EXTREMELY ATTRACTIVE,

  • EXTREMELY YOUNG WOMAN.

  • DID YOU SEE ME?

  • >> THOSE WERE THE DAYS...

  • >> Stephen: DID YOU SEE ME?

  • I DON'T -- DID WE SPEAK?

  • DID WE?

  • >> Stephen: NO, PEOPLE SAID YOU SHOULD SAY HI TO HIM, YOU'RE

  • BOTH FROM IS SOUTH CAROLINA.

  • I SAID, NO, IT DOESN'T MATTER!

  • THAT DOESN'T COUNT!

  • SO, NO, I DIDN'T GO OVER AND SAY HI.

  • I WAS URGED TO.

  • >> WE COULD HAVE HAD A PINA COLADA OR SOMETHING, THAT

  • WOULD HAVE BEEN NICE.

  • I WATCH YOU ALL THE TIME.

  • >> Stephen: I LOVE WHAT YOU SAY IN THE SPECIAL ABOUT LANDING

  • TO GO TO A RESORT.