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What's up everyone it's your girl, superwoman!
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'Girls on period,' possibly the most requested video of all time right after 'take your top off'
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Well, you're in luck!
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I do not think so.
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Now if this video is a tampon or pad commercial, it will go something like this
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"It's that amazing time of the month again. When my soul and femininity is pouring out from in between my legs into a beautiful Lotus Tampon."
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But I'm superwoman, and I keep it real. So allow me to say, there is blood constantly pouring out of us for 5 f-ing days!
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It's like a game of God of War down there.
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So fellas, let me teach you about girls on their periods, because most of you are clueless.
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And I'm gonna try my best to make this as pleasant as possible for you.
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But to be honest if you can't handle a little McNasty, then take your Mickey D and close the box.
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If you're still here, congratulations! If not, typical, typical men.
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What? Things got messy, things got hard, and you just went running to that X?
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Story time! Once upon a time, a guy asked me if girls use bandages when on their period.
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Yes! Yes, we do use bandages when on our period, but only SpongeBob bandages.
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It makes sense, you know. He's a sponge.
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Should I smack you? Or maybe the frigging bandage was made for Godzilla? Like, WT, do you use Ziploc bags as condoms?
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What kind of question is that? Don't be stupid.
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Girls either use tampons and pads, and for all you guys that go, pads, they're like diapers, haha.
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Don't laugh. That's not funny, because they are.
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Pads are uncomfortable, and they are irritating as F.
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And just like a child in an Indian family, if they're not straight, they cause a mess.
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Tampons are a little different.
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If you're an Indian girl, you've been taught since birth not to use tampons, because apparently, tampons make you a slut.
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Uh, hello, how dare you stick anything in that area? Don't you not reserve for a complete stranger on your arranged marriage wedding day?
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DUH~ And yes this is no secret that when girls are on their period, they are emotional, roller coaster.
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We're not stupid, we know this. Hormone are just all over this F-ing place.
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And baby I promise, baby, I know it's frustrating, but believe me it's frustrating for us, too.
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We cry for no reason sometimes, we get mad, we get sad, we get happy, we get glad.
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Like I swear to you, emoticons, were created by women on their periods.
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I mean who else would think of this many F-ed emotions? This right here, cramps. Want a chocolate bar. I'm so in love.
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What's happening to me?
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And we will never get used to our periods. I'm 23 years old and even till this day, I get shocked as F when I get my period.
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I'm in some next level denial. Ohhh. Don't worry, don't worry, it's alright. I probably cut myself. I probably cut myself.
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Yeah, don't worry. No, it's fine. I'm fine! It's fine! Nothing is wrong. Ok. Let's go swimming. Where's my wet pants?
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It is exhausting every month. Carry pads and tampons everywhere you go.
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Are you going on vacation? F, checking your work schedule, check your period schedule.
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Cuz you better make sure you ain't bring your own ocean onto the cruise ship.
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Cramps, chest pain, back pain, bloating, nausea.
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It's like a Pepto Bismol commercial from hell.
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Cramps. Back pain. Chest pain. Bloating. Nausea. And every emotion. It's so many.
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So many emotions.
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And water guns? Who needs water guns when you're on your period? Just stand still and sneeze. hachu..
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And here's a fun fact, girl's period do not flow when they're in water.
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And if you're a girl and for some reason you didn't know that. A, what the F. And B, grab a hose and like a lab coat. Experiment, girl friends.
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So in the shower, we are fan-friggin-tastic. Hot shower, relaxation all upon the ovaries. Singing a song. Do a little dance.
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But the second that water stops, let's just say that the reality show ain't got nothing on that amazing race.
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The race to dry yourself and get a pad or tampon back on before your period start Niagara Fall-ing everywhere.
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It is stressful. You need a game plan before you turn that water off.
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Ok, turn that water off. Ok, towel, here we go. Arms, arms, face. Ok. There's no time for the back, no time.
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Legs ok here we go. (che-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke-ke) Ok, on.
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You look at your white towel. It looks like the effing Japan flag.
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Also know that it's ok for us to say we're crazy, but you, hi, you can never say that to us.
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In fact, don't ever base any of our action or behavior on the assumption that we are on our period.
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unless you physically see me opening a pad. Don't just assume because I'm angry, I'm on my period.
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Because that issue is annoying, and tonight, when you're sleeping, I'll just assume you're dead and bury you in the backyard.
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Lastly, at least once in your life, a girl will ask a guy to buy her pads or tampons from the store.
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It is extremely attractive for that guy to agree and buy her a little pads and tampons, because it shows that you care about feminine needs.
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And as much as you don't want to be seen in public buying pads and tampons, just think about it.
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Her period only lasts 5-7 days. You still have the rest of the month...to be on her good side.
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And yeah, that's pretty much it. This is not me complaining that girls get their period, feel sorry for us, I'm not down for that.
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but I'm just letting you know, yeah, we get crazy, we get delusional, and we are emotional roller coaster. Can't you just accept it and move on?
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Sor-ry?
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And hey if you like this video, I make video every Monday and Thursday. Make sure you click that subscribe button, and rate, comment, and click the link in the description to share this video,
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because, hey, sharing, what's up, that's my answer, that's my justification, sharing, what's up. Subscribe, what's up?
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And hope you have a beautiful day because you're beautiful. And I love you so much. Muhauh, muhauh, from my heart and my soul.
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Hope you have a wonderful day, afternoon, evening, morning, whatever, what else. One love, superwoman, that's a rap period.