And I want to preface this whole thing by clarifying I absolutely love my family.

If they ever need me, I will be there in a heartbeat.

But you know, I have a feeling my dad is going to stop talking to me after a few watches this.

Oh, wait, he already has.

So my dad and I stopped talking in July And can you guess why kids drumroll politics?

Of course.

What else gonna be?

And then August rolled around and trust my birthday?

Excuse me, sports spokesman.

I'm a Leo.

So not wishing me a happy birthday when you are the literal reason I have a birth date.

That's the biggest betrayal I have ever known, Dad.

But this video, for once, is not about my daddy issues.

No, today I want to talk about what has gotten me through this estrangement from my already pretty distant Minaj.

And that is chosen family society from the time we're born feeds us so much unhealthy, unrealistically language around traditional nuclear family.

Family is everything flood.

Above all, you should be willing to forget any sin, make any sacrifice and hold.

Family is the most important pinnacle of commitment in your entire life.

Eat up, sweetie, but we don't get any messages about the people we choose to surround ourselves with as we go into adulthood.

And I am definitely not taking my chosen family for granted this year.

I'm out of town, obviously.

And full disclosure.

It's been very, very hard on my mental health and my best friends surprise facetime me for my house and give me, like a cat tour of all of my cats.

And and for my birthday, they set up a scavenger hunt.

And I have never felt more scene.

I was like, I love puzzles.

I love gifts.

This is both in one Q ugly, crying and then just on a daily basis, they are so encouraging and supportive and reflective and thoughtful.

That sounds so stressful.

I'm sorry your boundary was totally valid, baby girl.

Oh, I totally trust you to make the right decision for yourself, eh?

We'd love to see it.

You're gorgeous.

Wait to celebrate.

My chosen family encourages me to grow.

They celebrate my success.

They uplift and empower me, and they make me feel loved and welcomed.

And it's been hard, you know, not talking to my dad for half of this year, which is saying a lot because we don't talk often as it iss.

You know, when my friends say that they call their parent every day or every week that feels so foreign to me.

And I always wonder like, am I a bad daughter?

But we just have never been a close family, and I always thought there was something wrong with me or wrong with us for not being close on, like I do want to acknowledge, like we have pretty significant trauma behind us, having lost my sister that undeniably fractured us.

But that makes the lack of intimacy all the more painful.

You would think an event like death would bring us together.

But 13 years later, and I honestly don't think it has, and wanting that wanting that closeness, it just brings me so much pain.

And as my friend Melissa says, you, you shouldn't go shopping for milk at the hardware store, so I'm learning how to love my family from a distance and to keep people who make me feel loved clothes.

I'm an Americana.

Sorry for almost crying with emotion isn't cool.

I'm anaconda and thank you too rich for sponsoring today's video staple snack.

Baby Ritz believes that where there is love, there is a family.

And I hope that wherever you're celebrating the holidays, you feel welcomed, loved and a true sense of belonging and also full from all the delicious Ritz you're gonna be snacking on join us and helping create a more welcoming world at taste of welcome dot com.

Happy holidays, Yeah.