Name: Meghan: Duchess of Sussex tells of miscarriage 'pain and grief' - BBC News
Uploaded: 2020-11-25T18:35:17.000Z
Duration: 9 min 20 s
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Past simple

Meghan Markle, the Duchess of Sussex, has revealed she went through a miscarriage.

Modal verbs - A2

Writing in The New York Times, she said it broke her husband's heart and that she hoped people could commit toe, asking others if they were okay.

Past continuous

The duchess outlines the events of one morning last July, and she said, I knew as I clutched my firstborn child, that I was losing my second.

The duchess spoke of feeling and almost unbearable grief at losing a child, which she said was experienced by many but talked about by few.

In the pain off our loss, she said, my husband and I discovered that in a room full of 100 women, 10 to 20 of thumb will have suffered from miscarriage.

Yet despite the staggering commonality of this pain, the conversation remains taboo.

Meghan said she shared her experience to urge people to commit toe, asking others, Are you okay over the Thanksgiving holiday in the US, with more details for us?

Here's our royal correspondent, Sara Campbell.

It's an article entitled The losses We share.

So it's it's wider than just Megan's experience, but obviously she relates it to what we now know happened in July off this year on, she starts by saying.

After changing Archie's diaper, she said, she felt a sharp cramp.

She dropped to the floor with him in her arms, humming a lullaby, she said, to keep us both calm.

Um, she knew that something wasn't right, she says.

It goes on in in detail to talk about this distressed that she and Prince Harry suffered earlier this year, a Zeiss A in July of this year suffered a miscarriage and also sort of relates it to the fact that this is a can be a relatively common currency.

Lots of women talk about it or experience it, but don't talk about it.

She says that, you know, they learned that in a room of 100 women, 10 to 20 of them will have suffered a miscarriage.

So relating her own experience and perhaps hoping that this may give women the courage to talk about what is obviously a very painful and distressing experience for so many people living in America.

Now they are living in a house in Santa Barbara in California.

She's talking about this Thanksgiving, of course, in the States tomorrow, it's Thanksgiving, she says, as we plan for a holiday unlike any before.

Many of us separated from our loved ones alone, sick, scared and divided.

The significance of that sentence, of course, was that it was in an interview with a Night n reporter a couple of years ago that really sort of gave made it obvious that things weren't happy with Meghan.

And she said, Well, people, thank you for asking People haven't asked me that question on So she's really saying We need to be asking each other mawr, Are you okay?

And that's really the sort of thrust off the article.

But as you would expect because she is such a high profile person people, we'll be focusing today on the very personal, uh, news that she and Prince Harry suffered a miscarriage in July of this year.

There has been a huge reaction worldwide to this opinion piece, particularly for women and men who themselves have experienced a miscarriage or stillbirth.

The family were about to talk to have sent us these photographs off their daughter, Avery, who was stillborn at seven months for them.

It's really important to capture the short time they had with her, and they hope that by speaking about their experience will help break down the stigma.

Nicole and Steven Chidgey live in Manchester.

But they continue to remember the life off their daughter, Avery.

And I'm pleased to say they are with me now to share some of their experiences and talk about the blogged that they started off.

Just talk about some of the things that happened to them and to share their experiences with other parents.

Lovely to see you both Nicole and Steven and thank you for taking this time.

Families like yours have experienced loss in this way.

At Nicole, I wanted to start by asking you, just you know how you felt about Megan's peace and the things she had to say.

I think may it obviously it's heartbreaking to hear that again that you know, another person has gone through boss and has to experience the grief that you do go through it again.

She's she's really creating a platform for women to start speaking.

And I know across the lost community this morning, everyone's talking about it, and everyone's really relating to the words that she's saying.

I know for me, especially when it first happened to me in 2016.

No high profile people had ever come out that they've been through pregnancy lost before.

And I I felt really alone when it happened because I didn't know anyone, and I thought I was the only person in the world that it ever happened.

So it's just really nice to know that more high profile people are coming out there and speaking about it in creating that platform.

But million's of families that have been through it that feel alone.

So Nicole, when she talks about Meghan, the taboo off miscarriage and almost that sense of shame, is that still true?

Do you think, or are things also changing on that front?

I think things have changed in slightly, but it is absolutely still a taboo subject.

If you've not experienced loss, people don't want to hear about it.

A perfect example, would be the negative criticism Chrissy Teigen's received recently for sharing her side of the experience.

People like to remain very naive to it and not know about it because it is such a negative thing toe happen.

But the reality is it's a very real thing that happens every day, s so we do need to be talking about it more.

It's a very under research in a very under talked about subject.

And Stephen, if women aren't talking about it, I'm sure many men aren't talking about it either.

How did you feel when you experience the loss of your daughter?

Were there any men that you felt that you could reach out to and talk to about this?

There wasn't anybody directly because, as Nicole said, we weren't aware of other people going through this.

We thought she was the first thought or so.

If you get pregnant, you have a baby, and that's that.

When it happened, it was it was a huge shock, and it took us months to be able to realize that there are other people out there.

But I was such I was very fortunate that, like I was really open with Nicole and we were very close.

So she was my biggest sort off person to speak Thio as well as my parents.

But otherwise there wasn't really anybody that I could reach out to.

That would understand it from a sort off a personal level, until we came across Thomas on a rainbow clinic where I reached out to another another father.

It was like a a meeting for a coffee morning where you just got the opportunity to talkto other fathers and other couples on.

That, for me, was a real turning point because you can't get the same support talking to the same person who's been through it in your household or somebody who doesn't understand.

So that kind of level of out, which was was a huge part in my road to recovery.

So Stephen, do you think it's really important that Meghan talked about Harry and talked about his pain, his heart being broken?

A swell Yeah, most definitely, because I think like in society like the male has the Alfa Male response where you've got to be strong, and I know I certainly wouldn't allow any of my pain in whilst Nicole was kind of height of going through the whole delivery process and on all of that kind of thing.

But it's just it's so important to remember that one.

If if you are a guy who's been through it, you need to talk to somebody on, but it's okay not to be okay rather than trying to be the strength all the time.

Um, I just think that those outreaches that like Sons and Thomas have created is incredible because, as I say, speaking to other males about it is is so important.

So I think she's done a really good thing for, um for the whole organization, really, to try and help males because it is just so important.

I think you're both very brave for talking to us.

But Nicole, I wonder if you also think that it took a real level of bravery from Meghan to speak out about this so publicly knowing as well.

Of course, there's going to be some backlash from some people to absolutely, and they'll always be backlash, I imagine when you're in the spotlight.

But I think more than anything, what I think she must be really feeling right now is actually she's had a weight lifted off her chest because toe hold in something so painful, like that must be really, really difficult.

I know you live in fear of the questions When people don't know what you've been through.

You live in fear of people asking, Oh, you know, when's next they becoming?

I'm sure she really lived in fear of that on.

I just think it's amazing that she spoke out, but I imagine that it's actually been really good for her to do that on the positive messages that you receive from people saying you help them will absolutely outweigh the negative ones.

Will you have both helped many people today as well by speaking to us?

And we're really pleased to hear that Hunter and Eden are doing so well.