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IF YOU HAVE BEEN A LOYAL VIEWER OVER THE PAST FIVE YEARS,
THERE'S A SEGMENT WE DO ON THE SHOW THAT
I CARE ABOUT ABOVE ALL OTHERS.
BUT, AS YOU WILL ALSO BE AWARE, I HAVE RUN INTO A CERTAIN
PROBLEMS TRYING TO GET THE THING OFF THE GROUND.
TONIGHT, HOWEVER, AND I TRULY BELIEVE THIS, I THINK WE WILL
FINALLY ACHIEVE LIFTOFF.
I THINK YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY.
I'M GOING TO SAY, I SMELL A GOOD TIME, YOU SMELL A GOOD TIME,
IT'S TIME FOR CELEBRITY NOSES!
♪ CELEBRITY NOSES ♪ ♪ CELEBRITY NOSES ♪
♪ OH, YES... ♪ ♪ CELEBRITY NOSES ♪
>> James: WHAT'S GOING ON?
WHAT WAS THAT?
>> Reggie: IT'S THE INTRO FOR CELEBRITY NOSES.
>> James: WHY DIDN'T WE DO THE NORMAL INTRO?
>> JUST JAZZIN' IT UP.
>> JAMES: JUST JAZZIN' IT UP?!
>> CORRECT.
JUST JAZZIN' IT UP.
>> JAMES: BUT WHY?!
>> MARKET RESEARCH.
>> JAMES: MARKET RESEARCH SAID WE NEED TO JAZZ IT UP?
>> CORRECT.
SO WE'RE JAZZIN' IT UP.
>> James: I DIDN'T KNOW WE DID MARKET RESEARCH.
WHAT ELSE DID THE MARKET RESEARCH SAY?
>> YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW.
>> JAMES: NO, I DO WANT TO KNOW.
WHAT ELSE DID THEY SAY?
>> OKAY, STANDING BY.
SENDING EMAIL.
>> James: OH, THERE IT IS.
( LAUGHTER ) OKAY, WELL, THAT'S JUST NASTY.
( LAUGHTER ) OKAY, WELL, THAT'S JUST NASTY.
RIGHT, WELL, LET'S GO FROM THE TOP AGAIN, SHALL WE?
THIS TIME I'D LIKE YOU TO JAZZ IT DOWN, OKAY.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
JAZZ IT DOWN.
>> COPY THAT.
JAZZIN' IT DOWN.
REGGIE, JAZZ IT DOWN.
>> REGGIE: COPY THAT.
JAZZIN' IT DOWN.
>> JAMES: RIGHT, OKAY.
SO AS A LOYAL VIEWER OF THE SHOW, YOU WILL BE
ACUTELY AWARE THAT THERE IS SEGMENT WE DO THAT I CARE
ABOUT ABOVE ALL OTHERS.
I THINK YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY.
I'M GOING TO SAY, I SMELL A GOOD TIME, YOU SMELL A GOOD TIME,
IT'S TIME FOR CELEBRITY NOSES!
WHY'S THERE NO MUSIC?
WHERE'S THE MUSIC GONE?
>> REGGIE: JUST JAZZIN' IT DOWN.
>> JAMES: NOT THAT MUCH!
I SAID JAZZ IT DOWN, NOT JAZZ IT OFF.
NOW THERE'S NO JAZZ.
>> HOW MUCH JAZZ IS ENOUGH JAZZ?
>> JAMES: I DON'T KNOW, BUT WE NEED MORE JAZZ THAN THAT.
>> COPY THAT.
JAZZIN' IT UP.
>> JAMES: YES, BUT DON'T JAZZ IT UP TOO MUCH.
DO YOU UNDERSTAND?
WE NEED MORE JAZZ THAN NO JAZZ AND LESS JAZZ THAN THE PREVIOUS
JAZZ.
>> COPY THAT.
MORE JAZZ THAN NO JAZZ AND LESS JAZZ THAN THE PREVIOUS JAZZ.
REGGIE.
MORE JAZZ THAN NO JAZZ AND LESS JAZZ THAN THE PREVIOUS JAZZ.
>> James: HE'S GOT IT.
>> REGGIE: COPY THAT.
MORE JAZZ THAN- >> JAMES: YOU DON'T NEED TO
REPEAT WHAT HE'S SAYING!
THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH JAZZ TALK.
WE JUST NEED A TOUCH OF JAZZ, A SPLASH OF JAZZ.
GOT IT?
>> Reggie: AFFIRMATIVE, A SPLASH OF JAZZ.
>> James: A TOUCH OF JAZZ.
>> Reggie: A TOUCH OF JAZZ.
>> James: A TOUCH OF JAZZ.
>> Reggie: A DOLLUP OF JAZZ.
>> James: NO, A DASH OF JAZZ, NOT A DOLLUP.
>> Reggie: CORRECTION.
>> James: A DASH OF JAZZ.
>> Reggie: AFFIRMATIVE.
>> James: A DASH OF JAZZ.
>> Reggie: ABSOLUTELY.
>> James: LET'S GO FROM THE TOP AGAIN.
IF YOU'VE BEEN A LOYAL VIEWER OF THIS SHOW, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, I
THINK YOU KNOW WHAT I'M GOING TO SAY.
I'M GOING TO SAY, I SMELL A GOOD TIME, YOU SMELL A GOOD TIME,
IT'S TIME FOR CELEBRITY NOSES!
♪ ♪
♪ ( JAZZ )
>> James: STHOP STOP STOP!
STOP!
STOP!
( HOLDING NOTE ) ♪ YEAH! ♪
( LAUGHTER ) >> James: STOP!
♪ ♪
>> James: STOP!
HOW IS THAT A TOUCH OF JAZZ?!
YOU'VE GONE JAZZ CRAZY!
( LAUGHTER ) I JUST READ THAT LINE FOR THE
FIRST -- ( LAUGHTER )
STOP, HOW IS THAT A TOUCH OF JAZZ?
YOU'VE GONE JAZZ CRAZY!
YOU'VE GONE JAZZ NUTS!
NO ONE CAN EAT A TRAY OF JAZZ THAT BIG!
AND BELIEVE ME, I LOVE A JAZZ TRAY.
>> REGGIE: LOOK, WE'RE SORRY, OKAY?
WE JUST GOT LOST IN THE JAZZ.
>> JAMES: I DON'T CARE.
CANCEL THE JAZZ!
GO BACK AND DO THE REGULAR INTRO.
NO JAZZ!
>> GUYS, OUT OF TIME.
>> James: NO, WE'RE NOT OUT OF TIME!
WE'RE NOT OUT OF TIME!
WE GOING TO START AGAIN, WITHOUT THE JAZZ.
>> OUT OF TIME.
JAZZ TO BREAK.
>> JAMES: NO!
NO!
DON'T JAZZ TO BREAK.
DON'T JAZZ TO ANYTHING!
>> CUT TO COMMERCIAL.
♪ ♪
♪ >> James: WHAT IS HE EVEN
SAYING JAZZ?
THERE'S NO MENTION OF JAZZ!