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  • -It is the end of the week, and that's usually

  • when I catch up with some personal stuff.

  • You know, I check my inbox, I return some e-mails

  • and, of course, I send out thank-you notes.

  • Well, I was running a bit behind today, so I thought,

  • if you guys wouldn't mind, I'd just like to write out

  • my weekly thank-you notes right now.

  • Is that -- [ Cheers and applause ]

  • You guys are the best.

  • James, can I get some thank-you note writing music, please?

  • ♪♪

  • There it is.

  • ♪♪

  • It looks like he's got secrets.

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, "Bachelorette" getting replaced,

  • for only being the second most famous reality TV star

  • to lose their job this week.

  • [ Applause ]

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, Steve Kornacki and John King,

  • for being the McSteamy and McDreamy of touchscreens.

  • [ Applause ]

  • I love everyone's so impressed with the touchscreen.

  • My daughter was using a touchscreen at six months.

  • She was...

  • [ Laughter ]

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, red mirage,

  • for sounding less like a political term

  • and more like the 14th Marvel movie

  • to get postponed this year.

  • [ Applause ]

  • "Red Mirage."

  • ♪♪ Man, this one's --

  • You might want to help me out on this one.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • Yeah. I get to phone a friend on this one.

  • -Okay. Try it out.

  • -Yeah, just laugh even if it's not funny.

  • -Okay. [ Laughter ]

  • -It's pretty good.

  • All right, we'll see.

  • -Wait, right now? Or -- -What?

  • Yeah, now. Well, after I'm done.

  • -Okay. -After I'm done with the joke.

  • -Okay.

  • [ Laughs ] That was funny. -Wait till --

  • I didn't do it yet, but once I do it, then you do it.

  • Okay, here we go.

  • -Okay. -Almost.

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, Drake's new Alpine Yodels,

  • for not going by your original name, Yeti Turds.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • -Wait.

  • What? [ Laughter ]

  • -What? That was the original name they went with?

  • -Ah. -I don't know, man.

  • [ Chuckles ]

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, fancy wine openers,

  • for making my guests think that I'm either

  • a wine connoisseur or a steampunk alcoholic.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, owls,

  • for always looking like you just read Don Jr.'s latest tweet.

  • [ Laughter ]

  • ♪♪

  • Thank you, election week,

  • for hopefully coming to an end,

  • and for letting us all go back to a calm, relaxing life

  • of worrying about a global pandemic.

  • There you go. Those are our thank-you notes.

-It is the end of the week, and that's usually

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Thank You Notes: The Bachelorette, Steve Kornacki and John King

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/11/07
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