WHICH MARKS THE UNOFFICIAL END OF SUMMER.

SEASONSK WEEKSK DAYS, ALL BUT THERE'S BEEN SO MUCH GOING

ON IN THE NEWS IN THE PAST FEW MONTHS THAT YOU MIGHT HAVE HAD

TROUBLE KEEPING UP WITH IT ALL.

SO, IN CASE YOU MISSED A SINGLE THING THAT HAPPENED IN THE

SUMMER OF 2020, LET ME BREAK IT DOWN FOR YOU REAL QUICK.

TRUMP SPREAD LIES ABOUT VOTE BY MAIL, AUNT BECKY'S GOING

STRAIGHT TO JAIL, ORLANDO AND KATY HAD A BABY, THE NEXT

PRESIDENT COULD BE KANYE, MAYBE?

TWITTER WAS HACKED IN A BITCOIN SCAM, THE N.B.A. BUBBLE HAD

VIRTUAL FANS, HARRY AND MEGHAN MOVED TO L.A., TIKTOK MAY STILL

GO AWAY, THE F.B.I. RAIDED JAKE, EVERYTHING WAS MADE OF CAKE,

MORE WILDFIRES AND HURRICANES AND STILL NO LAWS FOR CLIMATE

CHANGE?

THIS SUMMER'S BEEN LONG, I BARELY REMEMBER-- WAIT, HOW THE

HELL IS IT ONLY SEPTEMBER?

DRIVE-IN MOVIES BECAME EVENTS, "BILL AND TED" WAS “EXCELLENT!”

"TENET" FINALLY GRACED THE SCREEN, THE NEW BATMAN'S AN EMO

TEEN, JAMES BOND DELAYED ¡TIL WHO KNOWS WHEN, YOU CAN ALWAYS

JUST RENT "TROLLS" AGAIN, "MULAN" FILLED OUT THE DISNEY

ROSTER, NO ONE KNOWS ABOUT THE OSCARS, “I MAY DESTROY YOU” WAS

A REVELATION, LOVECRAFT COUNTRY'S A HORROR VACATION,

SEEMA AUNTIE ARRANGED A MARRIAGE, AND I HOSTED THIS SHOW

FROM INSIDE MY GARAGE!

BEYONCÉ WAS A LION QUEEN, KIDS WENT CRAZY FOR “JOLENE,” TAYLOR

TAUGHT US ALL FOLKLORE, PARENTS LEARNED WHAT WAP STANDS FOR,

LADY GAGA VMA'D, VERZUZ BATTLES WENT ON FOR DAYS, DYNAMITE FLEW

OFF THE SHELVES, DIXIE CHICKS RENAMED THEMSELVES, BLACKPINK

AND SELENA MADE AN ICY MESS, BILLIE AND FINNEAS PLAYED A TINY

DESK, CHAINSMOKERS WENT LIVE, I WAS LIKE “WHY?”

THE CHARTS WERE ALL STYLES, GOING--

♪ WATERMELON SUGAR HIGH ♪ GUILFOYLE'S SHOUTING CAUSED

INNER EAR PAIN, HER BOYFRIEND DON JUNIOR WAS HASHTAG COCAINE,

THE GUN COUPLE SAID THAT THEY'RE NOT SORRY, A CHEF FROM RHODE

ISLAND HELD CALAMARI, JOE BIDEN PICKED KAMALA AS HIS V.P., TRUMP

COUNTERED WITH “PERSON, WOMAN, MAN, CAMERA, TV,” HE STRUGGLED

WITH RAMPS AND TAKING A DRINK, A PARADE OF HIS BOATS ALL STARTED

TO SINK, MELANIA RE-DID THE ROSE GARDEN, ROGER STONE GOT OFF ON A

PARDON, ANTHONY FAUCI DISAPPEARED, THE KIM JONG UN

THING'S SUPER WEIRD, McCONNELL SKIPPED TOWN, KELLYANNE STEPPED

DOWN, BANNON WAS ARRESTED, CROWDS WENT UNTESTED, THE

MILWAUKEE BUCKS WENT ON STRIKE, ATHLETES FROM ALL OVER BEGAN TO

UNITE, WHEN IT FELT LIKE THE NEWS COULDN'T GET ANY SADDER,

PEOPLE STOOD UP AND SAID BLACK LIVES MATTER, SO IF YOU CARE

ABOUT THIS COUNTRY AT ALL, PLEASE DO YOUR PART AND VOTE IN

THE FALL!