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  • Hey, Florida.

  • It's me, Conan O'Brien, here to talk to you about voting.

  • Even though 98% of my fans can't go to the polls

  • because they're either preteens or convicted felons,

  • that won't stop me from addressing you,

  • the voters of Florida.

  • Once again, you're playing a crucial role

  • in picking our president,

  • so whatever you do, don't forget to vote.

  • Forgetting to vote would be like

  • going into a Publix supermarket

  • to order the Boar's Head Maple Honey Turkey Sub

  • with Saint Andre soft-ripened cheese

  • and then forgetting the mayonnaise.

  • Or like forgetting you retired

  • and moved to Brookville, Florida

  • to play golf at the fabled Pine Barrens golf course,

  • but instead decided to play quarterback

  • for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

  • And if you're gonna vote by mail, vote early

  • because this year the Postal Service may be slower

  • than a senior on the Dale Mabry Highway

  • who just realized they missed the turn off

  • for the Courtney Campbell bridge to Clearwater.

  • (laughs) Yes.

  • I know my Florida.

Hey, Florida.

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    林宜悉 posted on 2020/10/26
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