♪ >> STEPHEN: WELCOME BACK.

LET'S SAY HELLO TO JON BATISTE.

>> Jon: WHAT'S HAPPENING WITH YOU?

WHAT'S THE WORD?

>> Stephen: YOU HAVE TO GOOD TO SEE YOU THIS WEEKEND.

PEOPLE OUT THERE DON'T KNOW BUT WE SAW EACH OTHER AT OUR FRIEND

JOHN ALTER'S BOOK PARTY FOR HIS BOOK "HIS VERY BEST" ABOUT JIMMY

CARTER, AND THERE YOU WERE.

>> Jon: I KNOW, IT'S BEEN MONTHS.

SINCE MARCH 12 SINCE I LAST SAW YOU.

>> Stephen: IT WAS SO DIFFERENT TO SEE YOU IN PERSON.

I HAD TO FIGHT THE URGE TO GIVE YOU A HUG BUT THAT'S NOT

HYGIENIC.

>> Stephen: YEAH, EVERYBODY WEARING A MASK.

BUT IT WAS GREAT TO SEE.

I COULD FEEL A HEART, YOUR ENERGY FROM YOU.

WE HAD TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN AGAIN SOON, PLEASE.

>> EVIE IS HERE.

DO YOU WANT TO SAY HI?

>> Stephen: YES!

WAVE INTO IS IT CAMERA RIGHT THERE.

>> Stephen: HEY, EVIE.

JON, YOU GOT ANYTHING ON YOUR MIND OR FINGERS?

>> Jon: I WAS WORKING ON THE KAMALA SONG.

>> Stephen: OH!

>> Jon: WE'VE GOT TO GET IT GOING, MAN.

>> Stephen: CAN YOU TAKE IT TO THE NEXT LEVEL?

>> Jon: YEAH, WE'RE DOING IT.

WE'RE GOING TO MAKE IT HAPPEN.

I'M GOING TO SEND IT TO YOU.

CHECK IT OUT.

>> Stephen: PLEASE, SEND IT TO KAMALA.

>> Jon: YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.

GIVE ME SOME POINTERS ON THERE.

♪ ♪

>> Stephen: OH, YEAH.

♪ ♪

>> Stephen: YEAH, YOU KNOW, THAT'S ENERGY.

>> Stephen: IT'S POSITIVE, UPLIFTING, IT DRIVES, NICE.

>> Jon: YEAH, THAT'S WHERE WE'RE AT.

I SMELL A SINGLE.

ALL RIGHT, JON BATISTE, EVERYBODY.

THANK YOU, JON.

>> Jon: LAY UT ON.

-- IT ON, YES, INDEED.

>> Stephen: NOW, AS MUCH OF A LOG FLUME OF

LIES AS THIS WEEKEND WAS, THERE ARE SIGNS TRUMP MAY BE FEELING

BETTER, BECAUSE THIS MORNING HE TWEETED 16 TIMES.

TURNS OUT ANOTHER SIDE EFFECT OF DEXAMETHASONE IS "RESTLESS THUMB

SYNDROME."

I'M NOT GOING TO READ YOU ALL OF THEM, BUT SEE IF YOU SPOT A

TREND: STOCK MARKET HIGHS.

VOTE!

STRONGEST EVER MILITARY.

VOTE!

LAW AND ORDER.

VOTE!

RELIGIOUS LIBERTY.

VOTE!

401-K.

VOTE!

SPACE FORCE.

VOTE!" (AS TRUMP, SINGING "SHOUT")

♪ A LITTLE BIT LOUDER NOW.

♪ VOTE.

♪ A LITTLE BIT SOFTER NOW ♪ ♪ I'M A LIG BIG LIAR NOW ♪

♪ VERY CONTAGIOUS NOW ♪ ♪ VOTE ♪

♪ HAY, HAY, HAY, HAY ♪ WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

ARCHIE, I APOLOGIZE TO HIM.

I CAN UNDERSTAND WHY TRUMP IS DESPERATE TO FIRE UP HIS BASE,

BECAUSE THERE ARE A BUNCH OF NEW POLLS OUT AND THEY ARE NOT GOOD

FOR THE PRESIDENT.

THE LATEST NBC NEWS-"WALL STREET JOURNAL"-AMY'S BLACK BEAN

VEGETABLE SOUP POLL FOUND OUT THAT "BIDEN'S NATIONAL LEAD OVER

TRUMP JUMPED TO 14 POINTS AFTER THE DEBATE."

EVIDENTLY, MIDDLE AMERICA DID NOT RESPOND TO TRUMP'S CORE

MESSAGE: "NAZIS, STAND BY, AND AWAIT FURTHER ORDERS."

THE DEBATE SEEMS TO HAVE REALLY HURT TRUMP "WITH VOTERS SAYING

BY TWO-TO-ONE THAT BIDEN HAS THE BETTER TEMPERAMENT TO BE

PRESIDENT."

AFTER THAT DEBATE, VOTERS ALSO FOUND THAT TRUMP HAS WORSE

TEMPERAMENT TO BE PRESIDENT THAN A COKE-ADDLED MONGOOSE, OR A

MACHETE DUCT-TAPED TO A ROOMBA.

IT'S NOT JUST NATIONALLY, THE LATEST "NEW YORK TIMES"-SIENA

COLLEGE-DEPENDS PROTECTION PLUS POLL FOUND THAT "BY

OVERWHELMING MARGINS, VOTERS IN PENNSYLVANIA AND FLORIDA WERE

REPELLED BY PRESIDENT TRUMP'S CONDUCT IN THE FIRST GENERAL

ELECTION DEBATE."

HIS BEHAVIOR WAS SO RUDE, HE OFFENDED FLORIDA.

NORMALLY, THEY DON'T GET UPSET UNLESS YOU USE THE SALAD FORK ON

YOUR DESSERT METH.

APPARENTLY, VOTERS AREN'T FEELING TOO SYMPATHETIC ABOUT

TRUMP'S ILLNESS EITHER.

THE LATEST REUTERS-IPSOS-WENDY'S TRIPLE QUAD BACONATOR POLL

"FOUND THAT 65% OF VOTERS AGREED THAT IF PRESIDENT TRUMP HAD

TAKEN CORONAVIRUS MORE SERIOUSLY, HE PROBABLY WOULD NOT

HAVE BEEN INFECTED."

WELL, YEAH.

HE'S CONSISTENTLY DOWNPLAYED THE RISK, REFUSED TO WEAR A MASK

AND, AT AMY CONEY BARRETT'S NOMINATION, TRUMP MANNED THE

KISSING BOOTH.

SO WITH HIS NUMBERS SAGGING, TRUMP IS EAGER TO GET BACK ON

THE TRAIL.

ACCORDING TO ONE ADVISER, "THE PRESIDENT IS 'CHOMPING AT THE

BIT' TO HIT THE ROAD AGAIN."

AND CHOMPING AT THE BIT IS NOT A FIGURE OF SPEECH.

DR. CONLEY HAS PUT HIM ON A COURSE OF HORSE AMPHETAMINES.

IN FACT, ONE MEMBER OF THE PRESIDENT'S TEAM TOLD FOX

BUSINESS THAT "TRUMP WILL BE BACK TO 'FULL FRONTAL

CAMPAIGNING VERY, VERY SOON,'" FULL FRONTAL.

THAT WAY, EVERY STATE'S A SWING STATE.

TRUMP'S CAMPAIGN STAFF ALSO WANTS HIM BACK OUT THERE.

THEY BELIEVE "THE PRESIDENT BEING HOSPITALIZED UNDERCUTS HIS

MAIN ATTRIBUTE OVER BIDEN: THAT HE APPEARS STRONGER AND

TOUGHER."

YES, YOU DON'T WANT VOTERS TO KNOW THE PRESIDENT IS MORTAL!

REALLY CLASHES WITH THEIR MAIN MESSAGE OF "MAN STRONG, TIE

LONG."

BUT, THIS IS SHOCKINGLY NOT SURPRISING.

"INDOOR EVENTS ARE EXPECTED TO CONTINUE, AND THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN

WILL NOT REQUIRE MASK USE."

IN FACT, THEY'RE GOING TO MAKE IT A FEATURE.

"LEAVE YOUR MASK AT HOME, AND WIN A JELLO LUNCH WITH THE

PRESIDENT!" WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH JON BON

JOVI.

YEAH.

BON JOVI.

♪ ♪