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  • - [Ashly] Told you there was another bucket.

  • - I really don't think everything's gonna fit.

  • - Just squish everything in.

  • - We should have rented a turtle.

  • - You can rent a turtle?

  • - Yeah, they're like five bucks an hour.

  • - Do they come with a name?

  • - They're a packing thing you put on the roof of the car.

  • - Obviously I was kidding.

  • (laughter)

  • - Ye of little faith.

  • - Nice job babe.

  • - [Ashly] Thank you.

  • - Amazing, let's go.

  • - [Diego] Avery, I got shotgun.

  • - [Avery] No.

  • - [Ashly] What the, Diego.

  • - [Avery] That's cute. - [Ashly] Get out!

  • - No.

  • - [Ashly] Sit in the back.

  • - [Diego] Whatever.

  • - Alright, I made a schedule of fun.

  • No wiggle room, two pee breaks max

  • and we should be at the beach by noon.

  • - Q, I saw a Q!

  • "Catch Billy Quest at the Erp Center January 6th

  • to the 8th, 2013."

  • Wow, they should really update that sign.

  • - You guys, can we stop playing the alphabet game

  • and will you tell me if you're okay with the schedule.

  • - Yes. - Yeah.

  • - Ooh, R!

  • - R, Make going back to school rule!

  • - S, S in school!

  • - Ah, how did we miss that?

  • - Good eye, good eye.

  • - Can one of those pee breaks be right now?

  • - Yes.

  • - Thank god. - Thank god.

  • - Hey, you okay?

  • - Yeah, I just want Izzy's last day to be really fun

  • and we're kinda already behind schedule.

  • - Just from packing?

  • - Izzy had a hard morning.

  • (emotional piano)

  • - Aw.

  • - I know, took like 30 minutes

  • just to put her toiletries in a little baggie.

  • - Poor Iz.

  • - What do you thinks taking them so long?

  • - Well, I mean.

  • - What do you mean?

  • - You know what I mean.

  • - I don't, I don't know what...

  • Izzy!

  • - What are you doing?

  • - [Ashly] Izzy!

  • - [Izzy] We're over here.

  • - [Ashly] What? (sighs)

  • - You guys, we don't have time for this.

  • - He's almost done, right Paul?

  • (sighs)

  • - Art doesn't flourish in a rushed environment.

  • But I guess it'll have to.

  • - Okay Paul, we'll be over there.

  • All right, let's--

  • Aww, come on. - [Avery] Aww!

  • - It's cute.

  • - [Ashly] No, no it's not. - [Diego] Oh, come on.

  • - [Ashly] Don't encourage them.

  • - [Diego] You're a little bit jealous.

  • - [Ashly] Don't spill those in the car.

  • Alright, everybody ready to go the beach?

  • - [Avery] Yes! - [Ashly] Goin' to have fun!

  • - [Avery] Yay, we're ready.

  • - Super Slurps, are you kidding me?

  • Pour it out.

  • - No.

  • - Diego, pour it out.

  • - No Diego.

  • - Diego. - Diego.

  • - [Avery] Hang in there buddy.

  • - [Ashly] Avery, I thought you knew better.

  • - [Avery] I was just, it was for both of us!

  • - [Ashly] You know I have a medically small bladder.

  • - [Avery] Oh, I love your small bladder.

  • - [Ashly] We are so behind!

  • - [Izzy] Okay, where are we in the alphabet game?

  • - [Diego] Look, world's tiniest sandwich two miles away!

  • - [Avery] Oh, what?!

  • - [Ashly] Nope.

  • - [Diego] It can be our second pee break.

  • - This is a waste of time.

  • - Come one, it's the world's smallest sandwich.

  • - Hi sir, how are you?

  • - Sorry folks, but we're closed.

  • - Oh. Well, maybe next year.

  • - Oh hold on, and when do you open?

  • - We're closed indefinitely.

  • - Oh no, what happened?

  • - Well, seems like my husband Carl ate the exhibit.

  • He mistook the world's tiniest sandwich for

  • a crumb for his regular sandwich.

  • - I'm so sorry.

  • - That's the way the cookie crumbles.

  • Thank you for your time, we're on our second pee break.

  • - Is that a camel and a zebra?!

  • Do you guys own that zebra?!

  • - We do.

  • - Of course.

  • - [Trio] That's amazing.

  • - Would you like to pat him?

  • - Yes.

  • - Heck yeah, heck yeah. (laughter)

  • - [Avery] Definitely.

  • Come on babe.

  • - Sweet knife.

  • I...

  • Oh good. 40 minutes later, you're finally done.

  • - Oh no, they're still playing with the zebra.

  • I just came to grab my phone.

  • - That's probably why

  • you didn't get all my "let's go" texts.

  • - 49 text messages?

  • Ashly.

  • - Avery we are so behind schedule.

  • We're gonna miss everything.

  • - You're kind of already missing everything.

  • We're having a blast.

  • I mean, when else do you get to play with a baby horse?

  • With your friends?

  • - It's not in the itinerary.

  • Izzy's missing her whole day.

  • - Oh, Izzy is?

  • - [Izzy] This is the best day ever!

  • Can we get dip'n'dots, Ashly please?!

  • (sighs)

  • - Hey, still have all day babe.

  • - Fran, where's the closest,

  • and yet best place to get dip'n'dots?

  • - Bout 10 miles down the road.

  • - Yes!

  • - [Fran & Carl] Goodbye!

  • - [Carl] Have a good trip.

  • - [Fran] Be careful. - [Avery] They were so nice.

  • - [Ashly] I know.

  • Alright, next stop dots and then the beach!

  • - [Izzy] (singing) The beach!

  • - [Avery] That was so fun!

  • And we're here!

  • - [Ashly] We're here, we're at the beach.

  • Dibs on the sand!

  • - Beach is closed today.

  • - Wait why?

  • - Riptides.

  • - Okay, well we won't go in the water.

  • (chuckles)

  • - That's what they all say.

  • - Who all?

  • - They.

  • - But we drove all day.

  • - Yeah it's my cousins last day.

  • Look at her face, you're gonna say no to that face?

  • - Oh, it's your last day?

  • - Yeah.

  • - Hey, you wanna know somethin'?

  • Don't give a hoot!

  • This is my job!

  • You think after telling hundreds of people to pack it up,

  • that I'm gonna risk my source of health insurance

  • on some half-arsed puppy dog face?

  • - Yeah?

  • - I'm not, move it!

  • Come on, move it!

  • Get, move it!

  • - [Ashly] What a crazy.

  • - You did good Brandon.

  • You're doing god's work.

  • Another day, another life--

  • Hey!

  • - Ooh Z, Z.

  • I found a Z on the plane banner.

  • "Zippity's Zipper Outlet Blowout Sale!"

  • - Oh, good one babe!

  • - I told you this was a fun game.

  • - Yeah, alright.

  • - You're so gorgeous.

  • - Probably shouldn't tell her I found a Z

  • like an hour ago right?

  • - Right. (laughs)

  • - Do you guys want to go to Yosemite next month

  • when it's cooler out?

  • - Yeah!

  • - Yeah, that'd be so fun. - Yeah, I'm so down.

  • I just gotta ask my dad if it's okay.

  • - Cool.

  • - Crap, actually I have to make a quick, quick phone call.

  • - [Ashly] Did you not tell your dad you were with us today?

  • - [Diego] Yeah,

  • everything's fine. - [Ashly] Diego, wait.

  • Wait, I gotta snap this.

  • You can take me just where you want to

  • Down to the coast to somewhere I don't know

  • ♫ I just want to go with you somewhere

  • Don't care where, I just want to be there

  • Take me down to the ocean

  • Take me anywhere the sun shines

  • Take me anywhere, I don't mind

  • Woo-Ooh

  • (scary sound) (bird squawks)

  • Be on the lookout for this one

  • She's only looking to have fun

  • (happy, playful music)

  • - [Man] Get in here (mumbles)

  • - I might have a black eye, like literally!

  • My girlfriend was telling me that.

  • - Hey, there's a hair in my water.

  • - Is it your hair?

  • (laughter)

  • (strange laughter)

  • - I don't think that looks like Donald--

  • - No not looks Donald Trump!

  • (laughter)

  • - Okay.

  • (jumbles her words)

  • - I am so sorry.

  • - I've been twice divorced by two women (laughs).

  • And guess what, I was been (jumbles words).

  • (glass breaks)

  • - Sorry.

  • - Now you don't understand this.

  • But when you get older, your body doesn't--

  • - (laughing) I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

  • - [Arianna] It's like, you're not Rhianna!

  • - I hope not, because--

  • (laughter)

  • - Close your mouth.

  • (laughter)

  • - 'Cause your moms my aunt, you know?

  • Oh (bleep)

  • I'm fine.

  • (grunts)

  • Oh my god.

  • There's a spider right here. (screams)

  • - Oh. - Oh my god.

  • Oh my god, quickly.

  • - Oh my god! - Oh my god!

  • - Let us in!

  • I'm gonna (beep) in my pants!

  • Siri, how do you get blood out of a, I mean...

  • (groans)

  • - It's a lawnmower riding motorcycle.

  • (laughter) (loud motor)

  • - Ashly, don't leave me!

  • - Do you love them?

  • - I perpetuate (jumbles word).

  • I (jumbles words)

  • (mumbles)

  • - Hashtag dizzy.

  • - Die already!

  • (laughter)

  • - The caffeine's kicked in.

  • Wait till I get a cinnamon roll in this tum-tum.

  • - Aw, good job babe.

  • - Thanks babe.

  • You're blocking the logo, move.

  • (laughter)

  • - [Francesco] Ashly's having a moment.

  • - [Man] Pretend you're a meatball.

  • - I'm sorry, it's not about where the meatballs are.