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  • - Oh God, I hate you guys so much!

  • - Oh my goodness.

  • Oh my gosh, that's picante.

  • - It's not even that hot.

  • - Oh my God, the pain really gets to ya.

  • Brings out the real you.

  • (lively music)

  • - Hello Smosh fam and welcome to the Spicy Noodle Challenge.

  • So, what we all did is we all ordered

  • the five spiciest noodle dishes

  • from L.A.'s House of Noodles.

  • - We are going to try each level of spice,

  • starting of course at level one, ending at level five.

  • Then we're gonna see how we react

  • to eating noodles made with ghost pepper,

  • giving them a Scoville rating of over two million.

  • - Whose idea was this anyway?

  • - Uh, it was mine.

  • - Ah, Damien! (laughing)

  • You spicy bastard.

  • (laughing)

  • (lively music)

  • - Hey, what's up guys?

  • I'm Cory Lane from House of Noodles.

  • Our noodles are handmade every morning.

  • To get that spice level that we're known for,

  • we use a mixture of ghost peppers

  • and some of our secret spicy oil

  • to get those noodles really hot.

  • So I hope y'all are ready for this challenge!

  • Are you ready, can I hear it?

  • Well anyway, the first round isn't spicy at all

  • so you can relax, but just a little bit.

  • (laughs) Cory out.

  • - This first level isn't spicy at all

  • so we should all be fine.

  • - I'm kind of a wimp when it comes to spice

  • so I'll probably tap out early (laughs).

  • - I just want to apologize in advance.

  • Sometimes when I'm in pain,

  • I say things that I don't mean.

  • - That's weird.

  • When I'm in pain I just cry,

  • like a normal person.

  • - I don't even feel pain.

  • This is gonna be a walk in the park.

  • - All right, here we go.

  • Cheers!

  • - Cheers!

  • (slurping)

  • - Mmm, mmm.

  • Oh, it's good!

  • Oh, oh it's good.

  • - It's got a little heat to it but nothing crazy.

  • - Guys, I just have to say,

  • (speaking in foreign language) (laughs)

  • That's Spanish.

  • - Damien, are you sweating?

  • - It's good.

  • It's not spicy.

  • - Damien, I thought you were good with spicy.

  • This isn't even spicy yet (laughs).

  • - I am good.

  • Don't worry about me.

  • It is delicious.

  • - Then take another bite.

  • - Okay, I will.

  • (breathing heavily)

  • Yum.

  • - Damien, I'm gonna start calling you Victoria Beckham

  • because you are Baby Spice.

  • - God, Shayne, Victoria was Posh Spice.

  • - I mean, yeah, I mean,

  • but you get the general point, it's still funny!

  • - Get it right.

  • - Whatever, look how much he's sweating.

  • - I am fine.

  • This sweat is probably just from

  • when I worked out this morning.

  • (laughing)

  • Morning workout.

  • - All right, guys, at level two,

  • they use a pinch of ghost pepper to make it a little spicy.

  • (laughs)

  • - Whatever, I'm not worried about this at all.

  • I'll crush this.

  • - Yeah, all right, Emma Bunton.

  • - Who's that?

  • - Baby Spice.

  • I looked it up.

  • - All right, shut the (beep) up, Shayne.

  • Let's do this.

  • Cheers!

  • - Cheers!

  • (suspenseful music)

  • - Mmm, mmm!

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • - I guess Ian speaks Spanish now.

  • - Hey, I'm just saying,

  • (speaking in foreign language).

  • - Mmm.

  • Oh, oh, holy hot balls, that's hot!

  • Ah, it's hot.

  • Ah, it's hot, I hate this.

  • I hate this, I hate this and I hate you guys!

  • I hate you!

  • No, I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.

  • I didn't mean that, I didn't mean that, I'm sorry.

  • I was just saying something.

  • I meant like I hate you for making me do this,

  • in like, it's a playful thing.

  • (slurping)

  • - Honestly, I'm doing better than I thought I would.

  • I'm sweaty but the flavor's good.

  • - Oh, no, no, no, don't touch your face.

  • - (groans) Ow, ow, my eye!

  • - Oh, you need to go wash that out.

  • - Yeah, I'll be right back.

  • - You good, Damien?

  • - Yup, super good.

  • This is some weak (beep).

  • - Most people that come to the restaurant

  • order level one or level two.

  • That's because they're pussy ass bitches.

  • Now level three is when we really amp up the spice

  • and it's not for the faint of heart.

  • - Okay, I'm okay.

  • I mean, I got most of the spice out

  • so as long as I don't touch my face anymore,

  • I should be good.

  • - Woo, okay, is everyone ready?

  • - Born ready.

  • - All right, cheers!

  • - Oh, oh God!

  • Oh God.

  • Oh God.

  • Oh, oh, oh God.

  • I'm the only truly talented one here.

  • I am the only truly funny person out of all of us

  • and none of you hold a torch to my comedic genius

  • and you (beep) know it.

  • I am so sorry.

  • I don't know why I just said that (laughs).

  • This heat is making me say things

  • that are totally honest, that are totally not true,

  • that are so mean.

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • - It's fine to me.

  • - I am also fine.

  • This is normal.

  • This is my normal state of being at all times.

  • - Damien, what is happening to you?

  • This really isn't that bad.

  • - It's fine.

  • I'm fine.

  • - No, no, no, don't use that napkin!

  • (nose blowing)

  • - Oh, oh God! (beep)

  • Oh God, it's in my nose, it's in my,

  • oh what did I inhale?

  • Ah, I feel like it went in my brain!

  • It's in my brain!

  • - Guys, I don't know if I can do this.

  • I'm afraid of what I might say.

  • - We all are.

  • - All I know is I'm gonna be fine.

  • - You can tap out if you want.

  • - No, don't need to.

  • Not even close to tapping out.

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • - I don't know what that means.

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • Ian, nobody here, including you, speaks Spanish.

  • Are you are you asking if we're ready?

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • - (speaking in foreign language) Yeah, okay.

  • Yeah, then yeah.

  • Yeah, we're ready.

  • - Okay, before we do this,

  • do not let me touch my face again please, okay?

  • No matter what.

  • - I mean just don't touch your face,

  • but yeah, okay, I'll make sure.

  • (speaking in foreign language)

  • - All right.

  • (intense music)

  • - I'm tapping out.

  • (buzzer buzzes)

  • (intense rock music)

  • - Oh, oh, I have erectile dysfunction.

  • There, I said it.

  • My weenie is limp, all right?

  • 24/7, three sixty five.

  • It's why I'm so mean and insecure.

  • It's because my weenie is limp, all right?

  • It's limper than these noodles.

  • (groans)

  • And also I get Botox in my face and ass.

  • I get Botox injections here

  • and I get Botox injections right there.

  • It's why I'm so (beep) good-looking.

  • I'm the (beep) best looking person in the world.

  • It's because I get beauty goo into here

  • and I get beauty goo into there.

  • You better believe every second of this,

  • that my weenie is always limp biscuit.

  • (laughs) Why am I saying this?

  • Guys, I'm so sorry.

  • It's 'cause of the heat.

  • It's not because of the heat.

  • I mean this.

  • I have a limp little weenie.

  • I have a weenie that looks like it was painted

  • by Salvador Dali.

  • Ah, now I'm gonna go cry and drink milk off-camera.

  • (groans)

  • (buzzer buzzes)

  • (slurping)

  • - I did it!

  • (sneezes)

  • (screams) Oh my God!

  • Oh God, it's all over!

  • Ow, oh God, get it off me, please!

  • Oh my God, it's spicy!

  • So spicy!

  • My face is spicy!

  • (buzzer buzzes)

  • (singing in foreign language)

  • - I got spice in my (beep)!

  • (buzzer buzzes)

  • - (Voiceover) Next week on Extreme Noodle Challenge.

  • - All right guys, today's challenge

  • is the large noodle challenge.

  • We are given thirty minutes to eat this very large noodle.

  • Whoever does it the fastest, whoever eats the most,

  • wins the challenge.

  • - Yeah, I'm not doing this challenge.

  • - Wait, why not?

  • Oh, yeah I see.

  • It looks like a penis.

  • (Ian speaks in foreign language)

  • - What up?

  • It's your girl, Spicy Bitch.

  • I'm now gonna get the audio of me screaming

  • about spice in my (beep) in the bathroom

  • and we're gonna see if the sound is good.

  • Is the mic on?

  • Hell yeah, 'cause that would've sucked if it wasn't!

  • - Hey, I'm Cory Lane from House of Noodles.

  • I'm gonna try not to be weird.

  • I'm just gonna try not to be weird.

  • Okay, here we go, here we go, here we go.

  • Hey, I'm Cory Lane from, oh (beep).

  • (laughs)

  • - It's just a little peanut.

  • Imagine if you found a soft peanut,

  • that is what my weenie is like.

  • - Oh, itchy.

  • Oh, it's under the nose!

  • Hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo, hoo.

  • That was a level of itch I didn't think possible.

  • (grumbling)

  • - And that's what we call acting.

  • See, it wasn't even spicy, kids.

  • That's just an actor at work.

  • An actor with a very professional mustache.

  • - My bad 'cause I was like,

  • "Oh I'll just add more of the spicy taste for the color."

  • But it's actually hurting my mouth.

  • (burps) Love you.

  • - I didn't personally enjoy Breaking Bad.

  • I think it's overrated.

  • No, I don't mean this, guys. (laughs)

  • I mean every second of it.

  • (speaking in foreign language) (beep)

  • - (laughs) I just threw the mustache off.

  • - And honestly, I think Batman v Superman

  • was the best superhero movie to ever hit the theaters.

  • (lively music)

  • (laughing)

  • - Ow.

  • - Oh, damn it.

  • It looks like a penis

  • ♪ I don't own a penis but I've seen one before

  • Once or twice in my life

  • And it's very similar to the way this looks to me

  • Penis-looking

  • Phallic is the word I was tryna find

  • - Well, wasn't that just an oddly sexual noodle challenge?

  • If you wanna see another video that might be oddly sexual,

  • click the box right over there.

  • Wow (laughs).

  • I'm just gonna sit here and smell this rose.

  • You know that dethorned roses

  • actually don't really smell that much.

  • Get the ones with the thorns, they smell better.

  • A little tip for you.

  • (Latin music)

- Oh God, I hate you guys so much!

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