Name: Stephen's Animated Monologue: Biden Denies Assault, Trump Plots Lincoln Memorial Town Hall
Uploaded: 2020-05-02T18:30:26.000Z
Duration: 12 min 35 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

>> Stephen: OKAY, I'LL JUST TAKE A NAP THEN!

THIS SORT OF THING NEVER HAPPENED AT THE ED SULLIVAN

>> IT'S "THE LATE SHOW WITH STEPHEN COLBERT"."

PLUS STEPHEN WELCOMES THANDIE NEWTON, AND INA GARTEN.

WITH A SPECIAL APPEARANCE BY JOHN MULANEY, FEATURING JON

AND NOW LIFE FROM HIS OWN SUBCONSCIOUS, IT'S STEPHEN

>> Stephen: HEY, EVERYBODY, THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH,

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, EVERYBODY, IN HERE, OUT THERE, ALL AROUND

FOLKS, AS YOU CAN SEE, I AM COMING TO ONCE AGAIN FROM THE

BEAUTIFUL ED SULLIVAN THEATER HERE IN MIDTOWN MANHATTAN.

AND I CAN DO THAT BECAUSE  TODAY MAY 1, THE FEDERAL STAY-AT-HOME

ORDER HAS BEEN LIFT LIFT AND SINCE WE'RE GOVERNED BY THE

FEDERAL COMMUNICATIONS COMMISSION, I'M PRETTY SURE

OF COURSE, I'M PLAYING IT SAFE BY BEING A CARTOON, WHICH IS THE

( PIANO RIFF ) >> Jon: GREAT TO SEE YOU, TOO,

I AM SO GLAD TO BE HERE, SINCE LOCKDOWN I HAVE BEEN DREAMING

ABOUT DOING THE SHOW FROM THE ED SULLIVAN.

( PIANO RIFF ) >> Jon: IT'S REAL, STEPHEN, AND

SOMETHING SLIGHTLY MORE CARTOONISH, DONALD TRUMP.

TRUMP'S POLL NUMBERS ARE GOING DOWN THE TWEETING THRONE BECAUSE

HE SO FRAGRANTLY SHANKED THE RESPONSE TO THE CORONAVIRUS.

FOR EXAMPLE, HIS SERIES OF DISASTROUS PRESS CONFERENCES, IN

WHICH HE SUGGESTED, AMONG OTHER THINGS, THAT PEOPLE SOMEHOW PUT

OH, LET'S GIVE THAT A TRY, OKAY, THAT'S A LITTLE TOO MUCH.

SO, TO CONTINUE HIS PERFECT RECORD FOR NEVER TAKING

RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANYTHING, TRUMP HAS STARTED A PUBLIC

CAMPAIGN TO BLAME CHINA FOR THE PANDEMIC.

I HAVE A FEELING IT'S FROM CHINA, WHICH MANY ARE CALLING

'THE KENYA OF ASIA.'" SPECIFICALLY, TRUMP HAS

PRESSURED THE INTELLIGENCE COMMUNITY FOR EVIDENCE TO

SUPPORT AN UNSUBSTANTIATED THEORY THAT A GOVERNMENT

LABORATORY IN WUHAN WAS THE ORIGIN OF THE CORONAVIRUS

I'VE SEEN THAT THEORY, TOO, FROM MY SOURCE ON THE INTERNET, WHO

ASSURES ME, "ERMAHGERD, CERERNERVEHRUS CAME FROM A

WUHERN LERB!" BUT YESTERDAY, THE DIRECTOR OF

NATIONAL INTELLIGENCE RELEASED A STATEMENT SAYING, "THE

INTELLIGENCE COMMUNITY CONCURS WITH THE WIDE SCIENTIFIC

CONSENSUS THAT THE COVID-19 VIRUS WAS NOT MANMADE OR

SCIENTIFIC CONSENSUS IS THAT COVID 19 "BEGAN AS A BAT VIRUS."

NO WORD YET ON HOW IT SPREAD TO HUMANS, BUT SCIENTISTS THINK THE

YESTERDAY, TRUMP SAID HE BELIEVED THE WUHAN LAB

Subtitles ListPlay Video

Stephen's Animated Monologue: Biden Denies Assault, Trump Plots Lincoln Memorial Town Hall

pandemic

aware

intelligence

culprit