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  • -Here's our favorite jokes of the week.

  • [ Cheers and applause ]

  • Senator Bernie Sanders

  • also endorsed Joe Biden for president yesterday

  • during a joint livestream, and lookin' at those guys,

  • I'm guessin' they each had to get up and livestream

  • five or six more times that night.

  • The Tour de France has been postponed

  • due to the coronavirus.

  • Well, of course it has. I mean,

  • things haven't been this abundantly clear

  • since they invented bike shorts.

  • President Trump said over the weekend that his decision

  • to re-open the country and economy would be the,

  • "toughest decision that he will ever make."

  • And that's coming from a guy who once had to fire Meat Loaf.

  • Couldn't have been easy for Trump to

  • fire a guy named after food.

  • The reality dating show spin-off

  • "The Bachelor: Listen to Your Heart" premiered this week

  • and features 20 single musicians living in a mansion.

  • 20 single musicians living together.

  • Are they trying to distract us from the virus

  • or create an even stronger one?

  • According to reports, President Trump threatened to

  • veto the $2 trillion coronavirus economic package

  • if it bailed out the postal service.

  • Oh, my God, would you just,

  • I don't know put him on a stamp or something?

  • Tell him it's for the postal service's ode to hotties.

  • [ As Trump ] Oh, yeah.

  • No, in that case give them whatever they need.

-Here's our favorite jokes of the week.

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