You can find the other videos in the series link in the description down below.

And yes, I am wearing my pajamas because it's one of those kinds of days.

So I mentioned in the comments of yesterday's video.

How do you bounce back so quickly?

I don't I'm just careful with all of my energy into 30 minutes of filming and then that if you're really subscribed, then click or tap the bottom below and make sure you turn on notifications so you don't miss anything.

Today we're going to have a little chat about ways you could be a good friend.

To a disabled person like me, the start of the year is the time great reflections and changed metaphorically, obviously much like a birthday don't actually feel for a different from one day to the next.

I personally mark the start of the year by considering where Iwas 10 years ago, it turns to put into perspective just how far I've come, considering I spent much of my teenage years entirely that found it also makes me prouder of where I am now.

I mean, obviously there are things I miss from 10 years ago, my grandparent's, for instance.

But generally, life really does seem to be getting better year on year, even if my body isn't.

I mean, it isn't all silver linings, though, obviously one of the things I tend to ponder on deeply at the turn of the year.

This friendship, those lost in those gains this particular comes from the yearly exchange of Christmas cards.

Have I even spoken to this person since the last time I sent them a festive card?

Happy moved country, and we're so out of touch I didn't even know.

Do I still want this person in my life on dhe, with my bath living in January, I dropped my party invite list and started the year, so I tend to really think about who just isn't part of my life anymore.

On the flip side, there are wonderful new people who have entered my life and become firm friends.

I moved schools a lot when I was younger, and then I became really ill when I wasn't sick form.

So I had to take a look at the time of school.

And by the time I came back ever and also moved on new friendship groups to be fired with struggled to make friends.

I'm a yellow personality.

After all.

What shall Calico Personality Video?

No.

One.

I'm talking about that, but I feel sometimes, like they weren't very deep friendships.

I had a lot of people I was very friendly with, but just a few I actually cared about.

And then I intend to know each other, so I didn't get to do it friend thing much.

And I always wanted a friend.

Star group.

I mean, probably most people want a close friend group that's not exactly revolutionary.

Jessica.

Thanks.

People ask me a lot about my experiences dating with just 30 but I actually found making friends was having a disability to be way harder.

People have to be a immensely forgiving.

I will cancel on you with very short notice.

I have to be late sometimes because I literally could not get up off the floor 20 minutes before the party started on.

I will definitely forget simple things incredibly, nor yang way, which is not to say that any of the friendships I have lost over the years.

My directive calls by my disabilities over on trying to put blame on someone or anything like that.

It's just that people grow and change.

And unlike a marriage where you're always working as a team and the idea is to grow together, it's incredibly easy to put a friendship down.

Forget about it, you know, put the hard work in much like dating vote.

Meeting new people in the hope of starting a friendship is very hard.

When you have your health condition, we don't tend to leave.

Our house is much traditional group outing faces aren't particularly accessible.

Some people Gary a great deal of able ist prejudice or are well meaning but incredibly embarrassing or embarrassed about talking to someone who they know has a disability.

According to research from disparate charity scope, 85% of young adults with a disability feel lonely and, as a result, over half of weapon used to saving people who have felt lonely in the past year.

So they experienced depression.

That's 62% of them felt that they experienced depression.

Of them, US 62% of US experienced depression, 58% experienced anxiety on DDE just on behalf experience.

Stress the isolation.

Uh, see, within my week, I tend to see Claudia, my wife, off to sleep.

We live together, Clara, my best friend and care on weekdays.

My favorite sign language interpreter.

Ruth Anne, my dog's Walter until he most weeks I also see my sister in law, her husband and their baby.

I mean, that's not really a lot of people, But now I also do finally have a group of friends who live near me I live on.

We talk often pervert daily in the little group chat, where we also send each other hilarious means or embarrassing pictures on.

We get together for no reason.

And they're all super sweet and cage to my needs about making a thing of it.

Hallelujah!

And maybe that said age thing.

Maybe there will just excellent human beings.

Maybe my taste in human beings has improved.

Which brings us to 10 ways to be a better friend to a disabled person.

Now, I realized, if you're watching this, you're probably one of the awesome people who already knows a lot about how to be a good human.

But if you would like to educate your father or your a disabled person who wants to help educate others or they're just came.

Having dispute.

He doesn't mean you know everything about all disabilities.

They were kind of varied.

Am.

You'll have very different experiences.

Basically, you just have to ask.

It's all the individual basis.

But I wanted to make a list video anyway.

He's also share this.

Video it with your friends on.

Add your own suggestions in the comments.

A good support network.

It's one of most important factors in managing a disability here.

In my top tips given last, I make shoot paste response because today Gordon are exchanging seven swans, a swimming presence, and I couldn't think of anything else.

Number 10 acknowledged person disappeared.

You know, this namby pamby ing around off politics?

Nothing makes me feel more valid.

Noticed that when an able bodied person says, Wow, I've got a virus today I feel really, really bad, But this must be what it's like for you all the time.

Respect, respect to you too, my friend.

Okay, none of my friends actually think that, and that's the train to be Aretha Franklin.

Nine.

But also don't make everything about their disability.

Oh, so you can't go to that crazily inaccessible mini golf place because your friend uses the real treasures in that wheelchair today.

So now you'll have to rearrange.

You have to.

It's the bartering.

Instead, how would you need to tell the bus?

You don't.

I'm sure your friend is plenty aware what they can and cannot do what they can and cannot go on.

How annoying that is for them.

Following on from that.

If someone has told you that something has a medical reason behind it, don't question it.

Wow.

You drink love Diet Coke?

Yes, I do.

And so I don't break constantly.

And so I don't feel nauseous, actually.

Funnily enough, my doctor told me that I should have it.

Don't you worry about all those chemicals in your body, though.

Uh, well, a you two, the other chemicals in the doctor prescribes something with be better than painting and vomiting all the time.

I see you have no right to make me feel guilty about my body on D that gas aboard.

Corinne, your hand Don't pretend to have an expert opinion on a person's body when you are neither there, doctor?

No, Have their lived experience.

Number seven Be flexible, particularly if your friend has a condition that fluctuates and affects their health from their body, but rather a pin down manner.

Because, yes, they could do that with you yesterday.

But no, they can't do that with you today, however, they are still the same awesome person.

So just be flexible.

Web.

They can't be six small gestures can go a really long way where that's picking up some shopping on the way over often to tidy the room a little bit while you chat, taking them to the cinema and handling everything.

What could seem like a small thing to you could be a really big home to that person.

Just ask them what they might need.

A little help with that small acts of kindness, Always shaken.

You can five try to avoid the kind of doom Eric Terms and phrases like Oh, well, have sad days to a chronically depressed friend or I get really tired this time of year to your friend of chronic fatigue.

You look bad to your friend who is two steps away from dying.

We will have to go sometime to a friend who's terminal.

Okay, We'll wait to be to fire you without much hassle.

I don't You think Bagel friends.

We'll tend to use these phrases of way to be nice to people and connect.

And that's good.

But also, just make sure you're not minimizing their situation.

Number four.

Avoid talk of cures or alternative therapies just because it worked for your Aunt Janice, who has a completely different condition to mind snow me and that I really want to hear about it.

Don't suggest solutions and who actually presented with problem.

And if you don't come at me with the yoga or kale, you are off the Christmas card list.

If you don't know what to say, just say that I'm not rather here.

Oh, uh, I don't know what the right thing to say is, but I really feel for you right now.

And I love you, brother, than any credit number to research your disabled friends.

Condition feels creepy, isn't they?

Probably spend a lot of time educating people on exactly what it is they have on how defects them.

Obviously you don't know everything about a person from just the diagnosis on a quick Google, but at least you have a base knowledge that you can then build upon by just a minute asking them things but not too many things.

Wait, listen to the person that the expert don't question the diagnosis or medical treatments, or even how they're feeling unless you actually some knowledge in this area.

And maybe not even that.

And by the way, I mean, a doctor is not inability to go.

Go listen when they just want to bend to get angry.

Everybody needs to be a little bit self pitying sometimes, and if they immediately afterwards want to snap back to everything is fine and good, you just go with that.

It's important to ask how you can help or if they even really need your help or they want your help before just jumping in.

Special.

Don't move annuals wheelchair without asking, that's that's irritating.

That's really irritated.

And don't take a blind person to a different spot because you think that's where they're aiming to go might not be, and also personal space.

Just sum up this whole point, though, just listen really.

Listen to the person's answer.

10 Top tips.

Onda shoot pastry swans.

What could be better?

Please leave your tips in the comments down below.

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