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  • You have experience of vicious animals.

  • Creatures... I feel like I have had a lot of professional dealings

  • with animals.

  • I did a film with a lion once.

  • Had to shoot with it, a lion, you know, a wild lion.

  • Well, I say wild. He's been in films.

  • LAUGHTER

  • And so I arrived to shoot this scene,

  • and the first thing I noticed,

  • the camera crew were in a steel cage.

  • Only big enough to contain the camera crew.

  • I thought, I'd better ask some basic safety questions.

  • I said, what is the sort of safety thing here with this wild lion?

  • They said, "The first thing is we make sure before the lion works,

  • "we make sure he has sex, just to take the edge off."

  • I do that!

  • And I said, "I'm not particularly worried about...

  • "I'm not worried about a randy lion.

  • "I'm more worried about the eating kind."

  • They said, "That's all right because we will the lion.

  • "We won't feed him too much because then he'll go to sleep."

  • And I said, "Again, that's not really..."

  • Because I know what it's like, you open a packet of crisps,

  • you have one, but then you want more, don't you?

  • And the third thing they said, the third sort of safety measure,

  • was that "The lion's downhill, and he's very lazy

  • "and he probably won't chase you."

  • And again I was just not really reassured by this,

  • and I said to the chap, you know,

  • "If it does happen, what are you supposed to do?"

  • And he took great delight, this South African handler,

  • took great delight in telling me that if a lion charges you -

  • useful advice - you have to reach back...

  • ..you take a handful of shit

  • and you throw it in the lion's face.

  • And I obviously said, "Where do you get the shit from?"

  • And he said, "Don't worry, it'll be there!"

You have experience of vicious animals.

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