Name: Jerry Seinfeld On Getting Married At 45 - "Late Night With Conan O’Brien"
Uploaded: 2020-03-20T00:50:04.000Z
Duration: 5 min 18 s
Description: Thousands of YouTube videos with English-Chinese subtitles! Now you can learn to understand native speakers, expand your vocabulary, and improve your pronunciation...

To-infinitive

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My goodness, I have not been on this stage in many, many years.

I, uh in fact, I am now a married family guy.

When I was last year, I was a younger man.

Clearly, I had some issues and I was enjoying those issues while I had them.

But being you know, 45 you know, that's 25 years of dating.

Do you know how much acting fascinated that is?

I love being married is when you're married, you wake up ready, you roll out of bed ready with answers, too.

Challenging questions that women are working on through the night.

The philosophical hypothetical issues that no one is ever considered before.

If you faked your own death and I found out about it what would you say then, being on a game show when you're married and you're always in the lightning round?

So I feel like I should have a podium in my house that I could stand behind.

Has my name and a little oval at the front, a little hand button clicker.

I'll take movies I think we saw together for 200.

Wife, of course, is always the returning champion from last week.

I'll take details of a 10 minute conversation.

We had a three o'clock in the morning eight years ago on.

I'd like to bet everything I have on that.

You did not win the weekend sex package or the guilt free televised sporting events.

Are you even listening to make a And don't forget to take that big bag of garbage with you on your way out of the studio way is not a problem for me.

Her garbage removal is one of my husband strengths.

Every scrap of paper is numbered, catalogued and five, and I just throw things out.

I thought you were done with it, and that was wrong.

Goes for some very nice memories and they're gone now.

But the point is that it is my personal opinion that all things all objects, everything you own really only exists as part of a parade of garbage to the dumpster.

Your home is a garbage processing center where new things are purchased and slowly demoted through various stages of trashy vacation.

You bring it home, you put it on the kitchen table.

You read the instructions you tell other people in the house all about, and then some time goes by and you realize maybe you're not going to be quite as keen on drying out fruit and storing it in your basement as you thought you were going to be.

So the object is demoted to the closet there for a while.

You start stepping on it to reach newer things that are just beginning on their journey to then the garage.

The garage can be one of the longest phases for the object, but it is the most definite.

No object in human history has ever successfully made it from the garage back into the house.

Word garage seems to be a form of the word Gorban.

When you're living in the same room as the garbage cans.

Well, it won't be much longer now, really.

EBay is the only thing that can save the object at this point.

Hey, of course, another great step forward in human culture.

Hey, why don't we mail our garbage back and forth to each other?

I gotta go, my friends, everything is thrown out in the end, even we are thrown out in the end, my friend.

And when I hear about someone that died and wanted certain important personal possessions put in with them when they're buried, I'm all for that.

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Jerry Seinfeld On Getting Married At 45 - "Late Night With Conan O’Brien"

eventually

process

journey

realize