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We waste a lot of time.
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Life is like a messy jigsaw puzzle with too much room
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between the cracks.
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These are the moments you're actually getting things done.
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And this?
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This is wasted time.
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Which, for the average person, amounts
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to 21.8 hours every week.
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That's equal to a part time job
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or running five whole marathons.
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The good news is, we now have an array
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of goods and services designed to optimize our lives
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and squeeze that puzzle into an impermeable, airtight hunk
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of productivity.
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And all it takes is five pretty simple steps.
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Step one, minimize friction, maximize hustle.
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Imagine you wake up in the morning.
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Maybe in real life, you look like this, or this, or this.
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But right now, you're just going to look like this guy.
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You're 5' 10", average build, with a strong preference
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for citrus, and an estimated lifespan of 82.
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Optimizing is going to allow you
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to milk as much time out of those 82 years
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as humanly possible.
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So pack your gym bag the night before.
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That way, you can grab it on your way out the door
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without having to think twice or second
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guess your athletic goals.
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Read your daily news briefing on the way to the gym,
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and try to complete a seven minute high intensity workout
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session, which can improve your oxygen
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consumption by up to 9%, allowing
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you to be more productive the rest of the day.
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Optimization is about thinking one step ahead.
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If you order your coffee while you're still at the gym,
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you can pick it up on your way to work practically
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without having to stop.
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Seamless.
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Now you work for a while.
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In 1930, John Maynard Keynes famously
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predicted that, with the advance of technology,
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we would only have to work 15 hours a week to get by.
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Well, Keynes' prediction was completely backward.
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Rather than reducing the hours we work,
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we've found a way to increase the work we do every hour.
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Eventually, you leave work and walk for a bit
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to offset the sitting.
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But then you need to eat off at the walking.
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Meal subscription services are awesome for this.
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So you can have everything you need for dinner chopped
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and waiting for you by the time you've unpacked
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and repacked your gym bag.
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Read a book while you cook, but not the whole book.
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There are services now that actually just
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give you the short version of the book.
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Same info, way less time.
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With all these time saving devices,
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you're now able to go to bed way ahead of schedule.
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And with polyphasic sleeping, you
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can stop spending so much damn time unconscious,
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and therefore unproductive.
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Step two, iterate.
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The next morning, you're up five hours
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ahead of time and feeling great.
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But you know you could be feeling better.
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At the gym, check your emails on the bike
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while drinking a meal replacement
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shake with an added shot of MCT oil
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to stabilize the glucose in your bloodstream
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and prevent you from getting hungry until dinner or maybe
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ever again.
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You're saving time and feeling great.
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And when you save time and feel great,
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you're going to have more time and energy
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to plan out how to save more time and feel even better.
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You leave work perfectly timed with the ride share you've
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prearranged, allowing you to complete a Duolingo Mandarin
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course.
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[SPEAKING MANDARIN]
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You're home wildly ahead of schedule and meal
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prepping next week's morning shakes while Alexa reads off
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your 23andMe results.
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You're hoping to reveal your suspected Viking chieftain
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routes, but instead discover your relation
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to a lineage of Irish mill workers,
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so should therefore be adding flaxseed instead of coconut
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oil, which you never would have known about if you
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hadn't listened to that bio hacking podcast last night.
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In your dreams, you descend into a deep, fiery cave
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that looks kind of like your gym,
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except inside a volcano, visited
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by conjurings of all the people doing more than you.
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Oh, look.
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It's Elon Musk and Kathy from work, who's already finished
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Obama's 2020 reading list.
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And Victor something, who you haven't
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talked to since high school, but apparently has a tech
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startup and a six pack.
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Wake up in a cold sweat ready to take your day
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to the next level with step three, which
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is to skip step three.
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Step four, accelerate.
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Fast forward a month.
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You have optimized your life so efficiently
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that you're now able to live five
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whole days in the time it takes
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most people to live just one.
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With a quick calculation, you realize that your previously
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predicted 82 year lifespan, combined
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with your current rate of productivity,
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minus the 34 years you lived before you learned how
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to optimize actually comes out to a whopping 240
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productive years of life for you.
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And the new pressure cooker you just
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got that's programmable from your phone
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will push that to 265.
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Hashtag worth it.
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Step five, eventually, you die.
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You win the international award for most lives
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lived in one life.
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No one knows quite what it was you did with all that time.
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All they know is you sure didn't waste it, right?
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[MUSIC PLAYING]