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  • - I pick orange.

  • - All right, basketball's my jam, yo. (laughs)

  • - Oh man, I'm gonna get picked last again, I just know it.

  • - If I were picking teams,

  • I'd pick you first Mr. Apple (laughs).

  • - Yeah and your team would lose.

  • - Whoa, whoa, whoa, who's the new guy?

  • I pick him.

  • - Move pipsqueak.

  • - (laughs) I have a feeling I'm gonna like this new guy.

  • - Great, now shut up and pass the rock.

  • - Rock?

  • Stupid apple, you don't play basketball with a rock.

  • - Boy don't I know it.

  • - Oh yeah, then riddle me this.

  • How you gonna play basketball without a basketball? (laughs)

  • On the road again

  • ♪ I can't wait to get on the road again

  • (lemon screams)

  • It's the shower crowds.

  • (car explodes)

  • (dramatic rock guitar music)

  • - Well I heard he got kicked out of his last school

  • for giving a bunch a bananas a bruising.

  • - I heard his parents kicked him outta the tree.

  • - Shh, hear he comes.

  • - All right bruisers, everybody hand over your lunch money.

  • - How, we don't have hands? (laughs)

  • - A wise guy, eh, you won't be laughing

  • after I tie your shoelaces together.

  • - How, he doesn't have feet?

  • (Apple, Pear, and Orange laugh)

  • (Bad Apple growls)

  • - It's really tough being a bully when nobody has any limbs.

  • I got it, I'll give you a swirly.

  • - A swirly, I love ice cream

  • Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. (laughs)

  • - No, it's when I put your head in the toilet and flush.

  • Come on everybody knows that.

  • - True, I know from experience.

  • (pear shudders)

  • - For reals?

  • - Yeah apparently I was sitting on Bad Apple's swing.

  • - Which swing is Bad Apple's Swing?

  • - Which ever swing Bad Apple wants it to be, pipsqueak.

  • (Bad Apple laughs)

  • - Okay guys, we need to do something about the new kid.

  • - I say we try and be nice to him.

  • - Worth a shot.

  • Do your work Marshmallow. - Yay!

  • Excuse me Bad Apple, it looks like you need a friend

  • to play on the teeter-totter.

  • - Yeah, actually that would be nice.

  • - Hooray!

  • See not so Bad Apple, isn't it nice to be...

  • (Marshmallow screams)

  • - Happy landing shrimpy.

  • - What the?

  • Marshmallow can fly.

  • Why am I always the last to know things?

  • - Hey Pear, you're standing on my grass.

  • - What? - That's my grass, move!

  • - This isn't your grass, this is the school's grass.

  • Anyone can stand here. - Get off my grass.

  • - It's not your grass!.

  • - That's it, eat grass.

  • Eat it, you love it. - What?

  • - Eat your grass Pear.

  • - Orange, little help here please.

  • - Hey, hey Bad Apple, hey!

  • - Looks like loud mouth wants to lick some grass too.

  • - Nah, I prefer my eye balls.

  • - That's it, lick the grass geek, lick it.

  • You love it. - This tastes delicious.

  • - No it doesn't, I tastes like grass.

  • - Nuh uh, it tastes like candy.

  • - No it doesn't it.

  • Does it?

  • - Hey look, Orange is makin' Bad Apple lick the grass.

  • (Pear laughs)

  • - What?

  • - No, I-- - Wee!

  • I love candy grass.

  • (Bad Apple growls) (Orange laughs)

  • - You're lookin' a little red there Apple. (laughs)

  • - You guys are mean.

  • I'm gonna tell on you.

  • - Who are you gonna tell? - Teacher?

  • - Yeah, I am gonna tell the teacher.

  • - No, teacher.

  • - Huh?

  • (Bad Apple screams)

  • Don't eat me!

  • - Whoa, this new kid's really getting chewed out. (laughs)

  • I'm sorry, too soon.

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • (Orange laughs)

  • - Ouch, watch it bub!

  • - Whoa, hey, what are you?

  • - I'm an apple.

  • (Orange laughs)

  • - Oh that's good. (laughs)

  • - What's so funny?

  • - Oh so seriously, what are you?

  • - Like I said, I'm an apple.

  • - Yeah, and I'm a hippopotamus. (laughs)

  • - Hey, I'm an apple.

  • Why is that so hard to believe?

  • - Apples are red not green.

  • - No apples can be green too. - What, you're pulling my leg?

  • - No I'm not. - I know you're not,

  • I don't have any legs. (laughs)

  • (green apple growls)

  • Hey maybe you're green because you fell in some toxic waste.

  • - What? No!

  • - That's it you're a mutant,

  • a teenage mutant ninja apple. - No.

  • Teenage mutant ninja apple

  • Weirdo with a green peel

  • Apple power

  • (Orange laughs)

  • - Would you please stop it?

  • - Hey, hey mutant ninja apple?

  • - I'm just an apple.

  • - Hey a mutant ninja apple, hey?

  • - I'm not a mutant ninja.

  • Look there are all kind of apples out there.

  • - Yeah mutant apples.

  • - No, no look!

  • There's apples like Red Delicious.

  • - Ooh, ooh. - Easy ladies.

  • There's plenty of delicious me to go around. (laughs)

  • - And there's apples likes red's cousin, Golden Delicious.

  • (oranges cooing) - Easy ladies.

  • There's plenty of delicious me to go around. (laughs)

  • - Heck there's other green apples.

  • Check out Granny Smith.

  • - Come here and give me a kiss.

  • I've got a dollar.

  • - You see what I'm talkin' about Orange.

  • - Whoa, you guys aren't mutants at all.

  • - Thank you.

  • - You're mighty morphing power apples.

  • - Ah crap.

  • - Make a giant robot.

  • Make a giant robot. - That's it, I give up.

  • - Hey, hey might morphing mutant ninja?

  • - What? - Can you beatbox?

  • - Beat what? - Beatbox, like this.

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • - Oh God, stop it.

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • Hey! Knock it off.

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • Stop, stop it, stop it stop it!

  • (Orange laughs)

  • You give me a headache with all that noise.

  • Can you please just be quiet, just for a minute, please?

  • - Okay, man. - Thank you, jeez.

  • (Orange beatboxing) (Green Apple growls)

  • Would you please knock it off?

  • I've had enough.

  • No more beatboxing.

  • - Why it's cool?

  • - No it's not cool.

  • It's stupid and annoying just like you.

  • Tell me something, where you dropped on your head

  • one too many times?

  • - Hey, hey mutant ninja apple!

  • - What? - Shredder.

  • (Green Apple screams)

  • - Oh no, Green's down, we've got to stop it.

  • - And we can, but only if we use our combined powers,

  • right Granny? - Where's my hug?

  • (apples scream)

  • - Ow, there's no knife in teamwork. (laughs)

  • Ooh, ouch.

  • (dramatic music)

  • (Orange laughs)

  • Hey, hey teenage mutant ninja apples,

  • you mutated into a pie. (laughs)

  • Teenage mutant ninja apples

  • Heroes in pie shell

  • Pastry power

  • (Orange laughs)

  • - Who want's some prune juice.

  • - Mirror, mirror on the wall,

  • do you wanna hear my bird call?

  • (Orange bird calling)

  • (Orange laughs)

  • - Ugh, leave my be.

  • I'm busy, can't you see?

  • - Yeah, busy reflecting. (laughs)

  • - No silly fruit, I'm working for the queen

  • trying to find-- - A unicorn spleen?

  • - What? - A fish wearing jeans?

  • - No. - Ooh I know, a farting bean.

  • - Silence!

  • - What? I'm just trying to help.

  • - My rhymes don't need an assist.

  • Besides, those things don't even exist.

  • - Tell that to those guys.

  • - Don't exist, eh?

  • This comin' from a talking mirror.

  • - You tell 'em Greg.

  • (creatures laugh)

  • - That guy's a real pain in the gas. (laughs)

  • - Ugh such frustration.

  • You're not helping my situation.

  • - Oh I know what's wrong.

  • You don't have any phat beats to go with your rhymes.

  • - What? No!

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • Stop! - Come on you're not rhyming.

  • - No.

  • (Orange beatboxing)

  • - Stop it! (Orange laughs)

  • - Jeez, someone's being a real pain in the glass. (laughs)

  • You just used that joke, pulp for brains.

  • - Whatever McChubby. - That's MC Chubby.

  • - Uh, listen.

  • What the queen asked requires the greatest wisdom.

  • I must find the most poisonous apple in the kingdom.

  • - Wait, who's in the what now?

  • - I have to get a poisonous apple for Snow White to eat.

  • I can't find one, okay.

  • Do you get it now?

  • - Oh, well why didn't you say so?

  • There's one right there.

  • - What, really?

  • - Holy moly is it hot in here?

  • - What, what is this?

  • - It's what you wanted.

  • A moistened apple.

  • - Seriously guys it's so hot

  • that squirrels are pouring ice water on their nuts.

  • (record scratching)

  • - What is there a problem?

  • We like cold acorns.

  • - I don't mean to be cruel,

  • but I said a poison apple you fool.

  • - Oh I get it, well how about that one.

  • - Ugh, don't get to close to me, I don't feel very good.

  • (apple sneezes)

  • - This is most outrageous.

  • That midget apple isn't poisonous,

  • he's merely contagious.

  • - That's what (apple sneezes).

  • - Gesund midget. (laughs)

  • - The time draws near.

  • I will never find a poison apple I fear.

  • - Steer clear of the deer

  • that poked you in the ear. (laughs)

  • - Please stop before I blow my top.

  • - Ooh, wanna flop and shop for a mop at truck stop? (laughs)

  • - Would you be quiet?

  • - Please eat a balanced diet. (laughs)