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  • -Hello, and welcome to the 77th annual Golden Globe Awards,

  • live from The Beverly Hilton hotel here in Los Angeles.

  • I'm Ricky Gervais. Thank you.

  • You'll be pleased to know this is the last time

  • I'm hosting these awards, so I don't care anymore.

  • I'm joking. I never did.

  • Let's go out with a bang.

  • Let's have a laugh at your expense, shall we?

  • Remember, they're just jokes.

  • We're all gonna die soon, and there's no sequel.

  • I came here in a limo tonight,

  • and the license plate was made by Felicity Huffman.

  • So -- no.

  • Shush.

  • It's her daughter I feel sorry for, okay?

  • That must be the most embarrassing thing

  • that's ever happened to her, and her dad was in "Wild Hogs."

  • No one cares about movies anymore.

  • No one goes to the cinema.

  • No one really watches network TV.

  • Everyone's watching Netflix.

  • This show should just be me coming out, going,

  • "Well-done, Netflix.

  • You win everything. Good night."

  • You could binge-watch the entire first season of "After Life"

  • instead of watching this show.

  • Spoiler alert -- season 2 is on the way.

  • So in the end, he obviously didn't kill himself,

  • just like Jeffrey Epstein.

  • Shut up.

  • I know he's your friend, but I don't care.

  • It was a big year for pedophile movies.

  • "Surviving R. Kelly,"

  • "Leaving Neverland," "Two Popes."

  • Shut up, shut up.

  • I don't care, I don't care.

  • "The Irishman" was amazing.

  • Long, but amazing.

  • It wasn't the only epic movie.

  • "Once Upon a Time in Hollywood," nearly three hours long.

  • Leonardo DiCaprio attended the premiere,

  • and by the end, his date was too old for him.

  • Oh. Many talented people of color

  • were snubbed in major categories.

  • Unfortunately, there's nothing we can do about that.

  • The Hollywood Foreign Press are all very, very racist, so --

  • We were gonna do an in memoriam this year,

  • but when I saw the list of people that had died,

  • it wasn't diverse enough.

  • It just -- no.

  • Apple roared into the TV game

  • with "The Morning Show," a superb drama.

  • Yeah.

  • A superb drama about the importance of dignity

  • and doing the right thing,

  • made by a company that runs sweatshops in China.

  • So, well, you say you're woke,

  • but the companies you work for -- I mean, unbelievable.

  • Apple, Amazon, Disney --

  • if ISIS started a streaming service, you'd call your agent.

  • If you do win an award tonight,

  • don't use it as a platform to make a political speech, right?

  • You're in no position to lecture the public about anything.

  • You know nothing about the real world.

  • Most of you spent less time in school than Greta Thunberg.

  • So if you win, right, come up, accept your little award,

  • thank your agent and your god, and --

  • So, it's already three hours long.

-Hello, and welcome to the 77th annual Golden Globe Awards,

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B1 US gervais ricky gervais ricky superb hollywood shut

Ricky Gervais uses Golden Globes monologue to roast all-things Hollywood

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    Amy.Lin posted on 2020/01/15
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