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  • Summer is right around the corner.

  • A lot of people have been talking about new diets to try.

  • Everybody starts dieting when it gets close to summer.

  • Like panicking.

  • Like we don't think about all winter long.

  • It's OK that we just put fat on to hibernate, somehow.

  • And then summertime comes and we're like, we've gotta lose weight all of a sudden.

  • Who here has been on... tried a diet recently?

  • OK.

  • Who started one this morning and gave up just a little while ago?

  • I went to the doctor to get a sonogram.

  • I'm not pregnant, I just like to take a look once in a while to see what's going on in there.

  • And while I was waiting in the room, I saw a copy of a Vogue from 1977.

  • They really don't change magazines that often.

  • And it had a diet in there.

  • This is from 1977.

  • "How to Lose Five Pounds in Three Days"

  • Here it is.

  • It's called the Wine and Eggs Diet.

  • Also known as the Real Housewives' shopping list.

  • So, for breakfast it's... you have one hard boiled egg, one glass of white wine, preferably Chablis, and black coffee.

  • Obviously you want to drink Chablis for breakfast.

  • If you drink Cabernet, it means you got a problem.

  • Only white wine in the morning.

  • For lunch, you have two eggs, two glasses of white wine, and black coffee.

  • So then you'll be wide awake to get fired for being drunk at the office.

  • And if you're still standing by dinner, you have steak, the remainder of the wine, and more black coffee.

  • The reason you lose so much weight so fast is that you have to get rid of your liver.

  • You have to...

  • That was 1977.

  • Obviously things have changed.

  • We do not have crazy diets like that anymore.

  • Oh, what's that?

  • We do.

  • I found a couple of other diets in Cosmo magazine.

  • These are real bad.

  • Here's one it's called Clip-Your-Nose-While-You-Eat Diet.

  • Apparently, if you plug your nose while you eat, you'll get full faster.

  • If you clip your mouth, it works even better actually.

  • If that's not your style, there's the Vision Diet.

  • So, you eat everything while wearing blue tinted glasses.

  • Cause they say it makes the food look less appealing.

  • Guess what?

  • It's still appealing to me.

  • Blue French fries.

  • I don't mind.

  • I'll eat blue cheese pizza.

  • I'll eat anything, if I want it.

  • But the truth is, we come in all shapes and sizes.

  • And the most important thing is for us... just be kind to yourself, and be kind to others, and drive a nice car.

Summer is right around the corner.

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A2 US TheEllenShow wine diet black coffee white wine appealing

Crazy Diets You Won't Believe Are Real

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    Ingrid posted on 2019/09/04
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