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  • - WHAT A MIND-BLOWING FINISH TO AN INCREDIBLE GAME TONIGHT,

  • WITH CHARLIE SANDERS WINNING THE GAME

  • IN LITERALLY THE LAST SECOND.

  • UNBELIEVABLE, TRULY SPECTACULAR.

  • CHARLIE SANDERS, HOW DOES IT FEEL?

  • - HEY, YO, I WANNA SAY SOMETHIN' TO EVERYBODY WATCHIN'.

  • YO, YOU CAN DO ANYTHING! ANYTHING'S POSSIBLE!

  • THE WORLD IS YOURS!

  • - AND CHARLIE, DID YOU THINK THAT THAT GAME

  • WAS GONNA END THAT WAY TONIGHT?

  • - YO, THERE ARE NO LIMITS, ALL RIGHT?

  • YOU CAN SWIM ACROSS THE ATLANTIC.

  • YOU CAN JUMP REAL HIGH AND TOUCH THE MOON!

  • - FANTASTIC. CHARLIE SANDERS, FRESH OFF OF HIS, UH, VICTORY.

  • I JUST FEEL LIKE HE'S READY TO TOUCH THE MOON.

  • - I CAN FLY! ANYBODY CAN FLY!

  • IF YOU BELIEVE IN YOURSELF

  • THE WAY I BELIEVE IN MYSELF TONIGHT,

  • YOU WILL FLY!

  • - AND WHAT'S NEXT FOR CHARLIE SANDERS AND THE ORANGE--

  • - KIDS, YOU CAN ACTUALLY FLY!

  • - NO--NO, NOT-- OH, NOT LITERALLY, OF COURSE.

  • - YES! LITERALLY! KIDS!

  • YOUNG KIDS, I WANT YOU TO GO UP ON YOUR ROOFS RIGHT NOW!

  • - WAIT, WHAT? - FLY INTO THE NIGHT SKY!

  • - OKAY. - PEOPLE WILL SEE YOU FLYING!

  • AND THEN YOU CAN DO ANYTHING! YOU CAN DO ANYTHING!

  • - OKAY, WELL, WE--WE--WE-- WE JUST WANT TO REMIND THE KIDS

  • THAT OF COURSE, YOU CANNOT ACTUALLY FLY, KIDS.

  • - YO, SCREW THAT NEGATIVITY, MAN!

  • HEY, BOYS AND GIRLS, AGES 8 THROUGH 12!

  • YO, DON'T LET NOBODY EVER TELL YOU WHAT YOU CAN AND CANNOT DO!

  • ALL THE PRETEEN CHILDREN OUT THERE, LISTEN TO MY VOICE!

  • YOU ARE IMMORTAL!

  • - OKAY, WELL, OBVIOUSLY, WE UNDERSTAND THAT CHARLIE...

  • - [groaning, shouting] - IS SUPER EXCITED RIGHT NOW,

  • AND THAT NO ONE IS ACTUALLY IMMORTAL, NOBODY AT ALL.

  • - HEY, KIDS!

  • YOU CAN TURN YOURSELF INTO A CAR

  • AND HAVE A FRIEND DRIVE YOU ONTO THE FREEWAY!

  • - OKAY, NO--WELL, THAT'S JUST A METAPHOR, KIDS.

  • - IT'S NOT! - JUST A METAPHOR--

  • - YOU STILL HAVE THE POWER OF CHILDISH INNOCENCE!

  • GET A FRIEND ON YOUR BACK,

  • AND MAKE A BEELINE FOR THE NEXT RAMP TO THE FREEWAY, Y'ALL!

  • - OKAY, DON'T DO ANY-- - TO THE FREEWAY!

  • - HE'S SPEAKING FIGURATIVELY, FOLKS.

  • - ONCE YOU GET THERE, AIN'T NOTHING FIGURATIVE ABOUT THIS!

  • YOU WILL TURN INTO A ROBOT!

  • FIRST AND FOREMOST, I JUST WANT TO SAY

  • TO ALL THE FAMILIES WHO LOST CHILDREN, I'M SORRY.

  • MY STATEMENTS WERE IRRESPONSIBLE.

  • I HAVE SUBSEQUENTLY LOOKED UP

  • THE TERMS "LITERALLY" AND "METAPHORICALLY,"

  • AND FOUND THAT WHEREAS I WAS NOT INCORRECT,

  • THEY DID NOT MEAN WHAT I THOUGHT THEY MEANT.

- WHAT A MIND-BLOWING FINISH TO AN INCREDIBLE GAME TONIGHT,

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