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  • Good morning, John. It's a Friday, and we've got some different perspectives on punctuality. I get to the airport...

  • like a half hour before the flight takes off.

  • I mean, it's Missoula, and I'm usually checked in beforehand anyway

  • and I never check a bag because I change my pants like once a week.

  • That might be too much information, it might be a pro tip. I'm not sure. But in 10 years of doing it this way

  • I've never missed a flight. I have however been late for a lot of things. I am a chronically late person. Sometimes

  • I'm just trying to get that last thing done before I go out the door

  • or I just totally spaced and forgot the thing existed.

  • And I always underestimate how long something is going to take. I don't like this about myself.

  • I understand that me showing up late is seen as a sign of disrespect by people and it is! It is disrespectful.

  • I feel terrible about that because I really respect the people I work with and I value them tremendously

  • but I'm not showing it. This has gotten worse with the book

  • which has a lot of deadlines and a lot of meetings and a lot of

  • signing and signing and signing and signing and signing...yeah. And also ever since Orin was born,

  • I've just had to do a better job of implementing the strategies that I have developed over the last

  • 20 years of being someone who is chronically late.

  • And here are seven of the most important things that I as a chronically late person do to not be that person as much.

  • 1. I let people know when I'm going to be late

  • and I let them know by how much I'm going to be late

  • and I do not lie about that. If I'm gonna be 10 minutes late

  • I don't engage in some sort of miraculous wishful thinking and think "maybe I will get there in five minutes,

  • so I'll say I'm gonna be five minutes late because it'll make it a little less bad right in the moment" and then stretch the bad

  • feeling out a little bit. No, this is terrible. Never do this!

  • 2. Think of the thing that's gonna happen not as the time at which it's going to happen, but as the amount of time

  • until it's going to happen. My deeply irrational brain sees 11:49 and 11:50 as two very different times

  • But it understands that 11 minutes from now is very similar to 10 minutes from now.

  • My phone actually tells me how many minutes something is away rather than at what time it will happen.

  • 3. If it's gonna take six minutes to get somewhere, I need to be driving out of the driveway with six minutes left, not standing up from my desk to go find my computer

  • and wonder where my keys are and then kiss my baby

  • goodbye, so that I get in the car and the meeting has already started.

  • All those things are gonna happen every time. I need to plan for them.

  • 4. Multiple alarms. I have two alarms that go off for every event: one a half an hour before the event and one

  • two minutes before the event. This is especially helpful for things like conference calls because I don't have to go anywhere,

  • I don't have to stand up from my desk. And if a half an hour passes between when I get reminded

  • And when the call is I'm gonna be deep...

  • researching salt mining techniques or something by the time the conference call runs around. I know this about myself

  • so I have that two-minute warning.

  • I just get on the conference call which is maybe number 5. Sometimes

  • I get on the conference call five, even ten minutes before that call starts and just listen to that dope music and do other stuff

  • so that I'm not late when other people show up.

  • 6. Here's a thing about myself: I like to not waste time, and this is part of the problem.

  • And I feel like if I get someplace early that will be a waste of time.

  • But I have mentally shifted myself to realize that if I get someplace early

  • something interesting and useful is going to happen at that place in the same way that it's happening at my desk if I'm not leaving early.

  • And finally number 7, my most important tip: every time you are late, get out your little notes-taking app, whatever it is,

  • And write down why it happened.

  • Diagnose yourself. Understand yourself. Figure this out.

  • So that is both advice and an apology to everyone including you John.

  • I'm sorry that I'm late all the time, and I'll see you on Tuesday.

  • And yes, signed editions of 'An Absolutely Remarkable Thing' are going to be a thing. Limited number, not all pre-orders will be signed.

  • But they are currently available at Amazon, Barnes & Noble and Books-a-Million.

  • They will also be available at your local bookstore when the book comes out, but only in the US and Canada.

  • That's just how it works, I'm sorry. And if you already ordered, don't worry,

  • the book hasn't shipped yet

  • so you can very easily go in and cancel it and order the signed edition which is a separate thing on those websites.

  • There's links at hankgreen.com.

Good morning, John. It's a Friday, and we've got some different perspectives on punctuality. I get to the airport...

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How to Stop Being Late Forever (advice for myself and other chronically late people)

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    Emily posted on 2018/09/04
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