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  • The Coliseum: It was in this vaunted arena that the masses satisfied their bloodlust, as they watched lethal and skilled gladiators fight to the death.

  • As slaves or prisoners of war, these gladiators were forced into battle and had but one choice: win or die.

  • Sometimes the only hope of a fallen gladiator lie in the whims of the Roman emperor.

  • Will this fallen warrior survive to fight another day?

  • Or will he be fed to the lions?

  • Actually, gladiatorial contests were way more tame than this.

  • So, whoever told you this version must have been "lion."

  • Oh, God, no! Puns?!

  • What are you talking about, Adam?

  • This was blood sport!

  • Nope.

  • In fact, for most of gladiatorial history, intentionally killing your opponent was against the rules.

  • That's why only one in ten matches ended in a death.

  • But I thought gladiatorial combat was pure mayhem!

  • They actually had rules?

  • Yup!

  • As well as umpires to enforce them.

  • All right, gents, I want a good clean fight.

  • No head shots from behind, no eye-gouging, and be sure to keep those genitals well-covered.

  • We don't want anyone losing their bits.

  • Touch weapons, and fight!

  • And these umpires were scrupulously fair.

  • In fact, if your opponent fell by accident, the umpire would stop the match and let them get up.

  • Please, let me help.

  • Ah, you're too kind.

  • But the most important rule: no killing!

  • Gladiators were actually trained to subdue their opponents rather than flat-out kill them.

  • Beware my deadly trident!

  • Which is mostly just for show.

  • I'm really more of a net guy.

  • But if no one dies, how do we know who wins?

  • Easy!

  • A match would actually end when a gladiator was wounded, got too tired, or just held up a finger to tap out.

  • Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow ow, ow, ow!

  • OK, I give up, I give up!

The Coliseum: It was in this vaunted arena that the masses satisfied their bloodlust, as they watched lethal and skilled gladiators fight to the death.

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Adam Ruins Everything - The Roman Gladiatorial Rule Book | truTV

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    Cyndi posted on 2018/04/09
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