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I'm the scary transgender person the media warned you about.
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I'm Rebekah.
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My name is Jamie Bruesehoff,
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and I'm married, we have three children: they're 10, 8 and almost 3 years old. So,
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I write a blog called 'I'm totally that mom'. In the past few years, my blog has
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really become more focused on our journey with a transgender child. So, Rebekah has
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always been gender non-conforming. As young as two or three, she gravitated to typically
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feminine things. She loved pink and sparkles and all things girly and that was fine with us.
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This is a soft blanket that I have,
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and it says Benjamin on it. So, we put it with my Benjamin box.
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As her gender non-conformity
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intensified, we started to notice some distress around things like being grouped with boys
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at school or in activities. So, by the time she was seven, all of this kind of hit a crises
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point and her anxiety was crippling, and her depression was becoming life threatening,
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and we were at a loss.
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There is a picture of me. I don't look so happy.
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We were faced with a 7-year-old kid, who wanted to die.
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One time she punched out the screen in her second story window
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and tried to jump out.
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The hardest part of all this was
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when I didn't transition and I was not happy and it didn't feel right.
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So, we sought the support
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of a gender specialist and so through conversations there, Rebekah came to tell us, 'No, this
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is definitely me. I'm a girl. I'm a girl in my head, in my heart.'
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I felt like I was a girl because
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I liked the colour pink and I liked girls clothes and how they wear their hair and stuff.
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At the time, it was the
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happiest I'd ever seen her, frolicking through the girls section of the clothing store, picking
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out clothes and seeing what she liked. She was just a different kid. It was like a cloud lifted.
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It feels good to have like a sister instead of a brother,
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since I already have a baby brother and I think a big brother
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would just be too much for me.
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When I see pictures of Ben, I just
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think of it as part of my past and now I'm me.
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When she told me I didn't believe
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her. I was shocked. I was like: 'I don't believe you, that is not true'.
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Rebekah really doesn't like thinking about the medical side of this.
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She doesn't want to develop into a man.
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So, medically transitioning involves a lot of different steps. And every transgender
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person chooses their own adventure. For Rebekah, the first steps will be puberty blockers,
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which will pause puberty and prevent her from going through male puberty and developing
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secondary male characteristics like facial hair and a deeper voice and an Adam's apple
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that are irreversible. The next step would be cross hormones. So, Rebekah is a natal
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male and so she would take oestrogen to develop and go through female puberty. As far as surgery,
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she hasn't indicated a desire for that, but that is a decision she gets to make down
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the road anyway. That's not something she would do before she is 18.
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I'm always worried about the reaction with Rebekah,
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both in the community and the church, and the world.
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I'm very worried about how the world's going to treat her, because I see lot of ugliness
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in the world on a regular basis.
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So, this is a picture I put up on my blog Facebook page
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that went pretty crazy viral. It started out with some
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really wonderful comments and lots of affirmation. But if I keep scrolling here, so I've got
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this one: "This is embarrassing... first she is what? 10, I think I read K . At 10
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she isn't mature enough to make this decision. This decision was forced on her by her parents.
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This is a form of abuse not recognised. Parents forming their child into a social media spotlight
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seeking their 15 minutes of fame. I do honour her courage to stand in front of people and
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speak what she feels due to the forced dialogue of her parents. This whole transgender issue
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is a mental illness. But it's "cool" because you have parents forcing their kids
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into it.' We haven't had anyone in our community, in our families say that we're
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pushing this onto her. We have had that through social media and through my blog and that
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kind of thing, who go as far as to say this is child abuse, and we should have our children
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taken away, and that we're sick, and we need mental help, and everything else. And
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luckily, every major medical organisation says otherwise, and every medical professional
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we've seen says otherwise, and so we feel pretty confident that we have the best resources
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we can and we've supported her the best way we can and that we've gotten the support
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we needed as parents.
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Our hopes for Rebekah's future
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are that she gets to be who she is, as boldly as she wants to be.
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And that, you know, folks are going to accept her for who she is and I guess at some point
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that being transgender is something that she can advocate for, but isn't going to be
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a limit for her in terms of who she is and who she wants to be as an adult.
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I want to make a difference in the
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world by speaking out and spreading hopeful messages.
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'Hi, my name is Rebekah, I'm a transgender girl. I've been living as myself since I was 8 years old and now I'm 10.'
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This is who I am. My friends don't
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even believe me when I tell them that I'm transgender. I'm just a girl.
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I want to send the message of 'you're not alone'
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and 'you're safe' to other transgender kids.