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Hey it's Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business
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and life you love, and this is Q&A Tuesday. Today's question comes from Tracy and she
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writes:
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"Hi, Marie. I'm starting to make a name for myself and my friends and strangers are coming
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out of the woodwork asking if they can pick my brain or bounce ideas off me or grab a
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coffee to ask me about my business and share their ideas. First of all, I feel like they
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should buy my product -- a training program that would answer most of their questions,
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but I don't want to seem money hungry or super 'salesy' with my friends. Second, I'm busy
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building and running my own business and I don't have the time to spare. I'm not sure
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how to deal with this so I've just been ignoring all the requests and feeling guilty. What
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do I say to people who want to grab coffee or pick my brain?"
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Tracy, this is a great question and something so many of us struggle with. I know it can
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feel really uncomfortable to say "no," but when you ignore things like this, it completely
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nags at you, you feel guilty as you've already said, and plus, all these requests eat up
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a ton of your mental and emotional bandwidth. Remember that people are always grateful for
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an honest answer especially when its delivered in a loving and compassionate way. And remember,
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there's lots of ways that you can help people for free. For example, you can direct people
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to blog content, you can do a set amount of pro-bono work, you can offer scholarships.
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However, if you're starting to get bombarded with tons of requests from people to pick
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your brain or meet for coffee and you don't want to do it, here are three scripts that
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you can use.
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Script #1 -- The "Spice Girl Script." "My work schedule is full so coffee is not doable
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these days. Are you interested in becoming a client or do you just have a quick question?"
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This makes the asker get real about what they really want from you. If they want to become
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a client, you can direct them to your sales material, and if they have a question, they
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know they'll need to be really quick.
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Script #2 -- Pay Me Motherhumpa. Look, I know you don't want to seem overly 'salesy,' but
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you've got to get that your experience and your expertise are valuable, plus, you deserve
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to earn an honest living. My friend Todd Herman has this great analogy for brain pickers and
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I think it could help shift your mindset. Here's how he puts it:
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"Would you ever walk into a store, walk up and grab clothes off a rack and then walk
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out without paying? Of course not because that would be stealing. So brain picker, don't
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expect to walk into my head, grab everything you want and walk out without paying."
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Here's a classy way of directing people to your product or program:
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"I'm not available for lunch, but you should really consider getting my ____. It's all
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of my best thinking in one place, and I created it to help people in your exact situation."
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Or if you don't have a product or program, try this:
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"I don't have time to grab a coffee unless we're doing it as an official business meeting.
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And my charge for a consultation, if you're game, is ____."
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Script #3 -- Blame it on mama. The toughest one can be when it's semi-social and they
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want to grab coffee to get to know you, they want to network and likely pick your brain.
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FYI, they WILL pick your brain, so you know how this goes. Well, what are you going to
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say? "No, I don't have time for new friends?" Actually, yes, you are going to say that,
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but here's a nice way to say it so you don't come across like an arrogant d-bag. If you
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don't know what a d-bag is, I ain't going to tell you because I don't want to get yelled
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at because there's a bunch of d-bags out there who love to yell at me.
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"I have a rule. If I don't have time to see my mother, I don't have time to meet new people
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for coffee, and right now, I owe my mama a visit. But seriously, I'm sure we'd have a
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blast and I hope you're not insulted, but my work schedule is packed and I've got to
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pass."
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The bottom line is this, and you bet your buns it's a tweetable:
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"If they want to pick your brain, ask them to pick a time and a method of payment."
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Because at the end of the day, if you want people to value your time, you have to put
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a value on it.
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Tracy, that was my A to your Q. hopefully these scripts have helped. Now I would love
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to hear from you. Do you have a go-to way to answer people who want to pick your brain
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or take you out for coffee? Or have you ever been that person who's asking to take someone
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out to coffee or pick their brain where you handled eloquently? I would love to hear your
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story.
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As always, the best discussions happen after the episode at MarieForleo.com so go there
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and leave a comment now.
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Did you like this video? I did. If you did, subscribe to the channel and share it with
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your friends, and if you want even more great resources to create a business and a life
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that you love, plus some personal insights from me that I only talk about in e-mail,
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get your buns over to MarieForleo.com and sign up for e-mail updates.
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Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special
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gift that only you have. Thank you so much for watching and I'll catch you next time
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on MarieTV.