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  • Hi, I'm Ashley Weston.

  • I'm a celebrity mentor stylist.

  • So today, I am joined by my fiance, Dorian.

  • - Hello.

  • - The reason why I wanted Dorian, actually,

  • to be in today's video

  • is because he's probably one of the best conversationalists

  • that I know.

  • So, that's why I wanted him

  • to just come on the channel

  • and really help us all out with today's topic.

  • - Thank you, very high praise, I'll take it.

  • (laughing)

  • I have definitely struggled with being able to get into conversations with people.

  • I can always maintain them,

  • but I've always had trouble just,

  • and I think it's because I'm shy,

  • but I've always had difficulty

  • getting into a conversation with someone--

  • - And getting out of them.

  • Let's be honest. - Yes, and getting outta them.

  • - But Dorian has been really helpful

  • with getting me better

  • at being a better conversationalist.

  • So, let's get into the best conversation starters.

  • Number seven is,

  • do you know where the restroom, bar, food area is?

  • - The hardest thing in a conversation is to start it.

  • That it is, like that's the most difficult thing.

  • Once you're in it, it's relatively simple.

  • So, you always want to ask someone a question

  • that's kind of disarming that

  • they can easily answer for you,

  • or they can even say I don't know.

  • So, that is like the quickest, easiest thing,

  • and it doesn't matter on the venue,

  • whether it's a big event or a conference

  • or even a house party.

  • They won't even remember that you needed

  • to know where the restroom or bar is.

  • They don't even know the reason anyway,

  • so it's not like you have to immediately leave.

  • I think a lot of people would say,

  • well, okay, they told me, but now I have to leave.

  • No, no, no, you just keep the...

  • now you're in the conversation,

  • that's the beauty of it. - Now go with it.

  • - Yeah, go with it!

  • - Number six going up to someone

  • and saying, hey, so where are you from exactly?

  • Or, are you from around here?

  • - That's like a good one,

  • because especially if someone doesn't look like

  • they're a part of a crew, or they're kind of,

  • I use that one a lot on,

  • if people are off by themselves

  • or a little small group.

  • It's usually more of a one-on-one kind of thing.

  • It's hard to walk up to a group and then say that,

  • and the group was like, well who are you talking to?

  • - Where are you all from?

  • - Yeah, that's a good one if it's an individual person

  • and you're just trying to make conversation,

  • and you kinda zoned in on them.

  • That's a great one to start out with.

  • It's really easy to answer, again,

  • you just looking to start a conversation.

  • You don't wanna hit them with heavy question,

  • that's pretty weird.

  • Number five is actually something that Dorian has taught me,

  • and has worked very well, and that is

  • if someone is holding a plate of food or a drink,

  • you just go up to them like,

  • oh hey, that looks really good, what is that?

  • Where'd you get the from?

  • - Like a super easy one.

  • It like, again, they can answer it very simply.

  • It's not offensive in any way,

  • and then you have the conversation

  • of oh, is it good?

  • Like, oh, what do you like to drink normally

  • or do you eat that kind of food normally,

  • or even then you go into,

  • the beauty is, all of these conversation starters,

  • you can use all the other ones

  • to keep the conversation going.

  • Oh, so where are you from, exactly?

  • Oh, hey, actually, do you know where the restroom is

  • or whatever.

  • You know, you could use, you can combine them all together

  • and now you're in a pretty decent conversation.

  • So, again, that's just a great opening line,

  • 'cause someone's got something in their hands,

  • it's easy to talk about.

  • - Number four on the list is very similar to number five,

  • and that is when you go up to someone and you say,

  • Hey, I really like your shirt.

  • Where'd you get that from?

  • - And my answer is, Ashley got it for me.

  • - People love compliments.

  • It instantly lets their guard down.

  • So, I always try to,

  • especially if I just can't think of anything,

  • I'll just compliment them on something that they're wearing,

  • and ask them where did they get it,

  • or something like that.

  • Number three is, so what was the best part of your day?

  • - I included this one because I was asked this question

  • maybe like 10, 15 years ago,

  • and it stuck with me ever since.

  • It was like, such a nice change.

  • I was an entertainment executive for a long time.

  • So, I was at meetings, meeting new people all the time,

  • and out of all the years I was doing all that,

  • interfacing with a lot of strangers and new people,

  • one person asked me that question

  • and it stuck with me ever since,

  • and it was such a great question.

  • It would make me feel good

  • that someone would ask that question.

  • I was like, oh, this one's amazing.

  • Bit of a gamble, depending on the group, obviously.

  • But I would say that that is one

  • that will kind of put someone back

  • on their heels just a little bit.

  • So, if you're not really that comfortable

  • with that kind of,

  • it's a bit of a bold question to start with,

  • but I will tell you I've remembered that question

  • ever since that day,

  • and I felt like it was a really, really good one.

  • I've used it on other people, and they said the same thing,

  • like, "That's like a great question".

  • And then they--

  • - People will remember you by that.

  • - Definitely, definitely.

  • - Number two is something that I use a lot,

  • and I know Dorian does as well, and that is,

  • so, what brought you here tonight

  • or today et cetera.

  • So, this is great if you're at a bar or some kind of event

  • that's not hosted by someone specifically,

  • but it's a really easy way to get into a conversation.

  • - Yeah.

  • So, someone has a reason for going everywhere.

  • So, they're not.

  • Even if they don't have a reason,

  • like, I don't know, I just came with my friend.

  • Oh, well, who's your friend? - Yeah.

  • - Like, you're already immediately

  • into a conversation again.

  • So, it's a really, really great one.

  • That's my go-to for sure.

  • - Especially because it's not a yes or no,

  • and it's not a quick answer, usually.

  • So, their answer,

  • they're probably giving a lot of good information

  • that you can kinda hook onto,

  • and then form your next question.

  • So, the number one conversation starter

  • that you should use,

  • and it's kinda similar, actually, to number two,

  • and that is, going up to someone and saying,

  • hi, so how do you know so-and-so?

  • Which means the so-and-so is the host of the event.

  • - You, for the longest time,

  • couldn't wrap your head around this question,

  • but I'm like, if you're invited somewhere by the host,

  • the people at the same place are probably also invited

  • by the host, so now you have a common ground already.

  • So, it's not like this person's like,

  • well, what the hell, who are you,

  • like, why would you even ask me that question.

  • You always found it so weird,

  • and I'm like, just try it

  • when you're at a party. - Now, we use it all the time.

  • - If we're at a party hosted by someone specific,

  • I'm always, I will go up to people now

  • and I have no qualms, and I'm like,

  • hey, so how do you know Charlie?

  • It's great.

  • This is so easy now.

  • And then, I get to learn a lot of cool information

  • that maybe my host wouldn't have told me about that person.

  • - Yeah, you already have common ground

  • to stand on and discuss, so use it.

  • - If you liked this video, remember to give it a thumbs up.

  • Subscribe to my channel for more videos like this,

  • and thank you so much, Dorian, for being here,

  • - You're welcome, it's my pleasure.

  • - and sharing your wisdom.

  • Like I said at the top, Dorian is incredible

  • on getting into and then maintaining conversations.

  • So, these are gonna be really helpful.

  • They've helped me.

  • So, I know if they've helped me,

  • they're definitely gonna help you.

  • Hope you all enjoy.

  • - And I was never a great conversationalist growing up.

  • I had to learn the hard way

  • when I was an entertainment executive.

  • I just got thrown into these random situations.

  • So, these are the things that I've learned over the years.

  • I'm telling you, they work, and I am not--

  • - Tried and true.

  • - Yeah, I am not like an outgoing sorta guy.

  • I can do it if I need to, but that is not my default.

  • So, trust it, use them, love them.

  • - Alright.

  • We need to get outta here.

  • - Yeah, I'm done.

  • - This video's done.

Hi, I'm Ashley Weston.

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A2 US dorian conversation question restroom answer great

7 Greatest Conversation Starters That Actually Work

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    林恩立 posted on 2017/09/05
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