Subtitles section Play video
-
HONEST TRAILER: The Last Airbender
-
VOICE From the once successful director
-
who turned his own name into box- office poison...comes the poorly
-
directed, lazily written, terribly shot, poorly acted, clumsily
-
edited, oddly paced, insulting adaptation of...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) The Last Airbender.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) In crappily converted 3D!
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Prepare for the vibrant world of
-
Nickelodeon's beloved Avatar to get
-
M. Night Shat-upon in the worst cartoon adaptation since Dragonball
-
Evolution.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Watch as the ethnically diverse
-
heroes you know and love are brought to life...as generic white
-
kids!
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And the ethnically diverse
-
villains...stay ethnically diverse
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Wonder in amazement at how a $150
-
million dollar movie ended up with some of the worst special effects
-
ever put to film...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Scenes that weren't lit properly...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And unknown child actors who are
-
bad even by child actor standards.
-
They haven't been able to conquer big cities like Ba Sing Se
-
but they're making plans I'm sure.
-
So, are you the Avatar?
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Ugh. I hope these kids stayed in
-
school.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Journey across four magical
-
kingdoms, where a chosen few *sort of* have the power to bend the
-
elements to their will
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Firebenders who can't catch
-
anything on fire
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Waterbenders who can't get this guy
-
wet.
-
Water drops on her brother and he's immediately dry
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And Earthbenders who could just as
-
easily have picked up this rock and thrown it.
-
Six Earth benders throw a single rock
-
VOICE (CONT'D) But when the evil firebender Prince
-
Zuko goes on the warpath.
-
BRING ME ALL YOUR ELDERLY
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Humanity's last hope is a boy who
-
can master every element, The Avatar.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Oh man, I wish. No, this pouty one
-
with all the henna tattoos... doing his green-belt karate
-
demonstration.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Join Aang and two unnecessary
-
sidekicks as they struggle to cram 20 episodes of backstory into one
-
movie, with techniques like...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Weird introductions.
-
My name is Katara and I'm the only water bender
-
left in the southern water tribe.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Weird compliments.
-
You are a gifted strategist...Your failure in the
-
100-day-seige of Bah Sing Se won't be held against you
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Awkward toasts.
-
I wanted to thank General Iro and young Prince Zuko
-
for dining with us...As you know, the fire lord has banished
-
his son the prince and renounced his love of him.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And a super long Star Wars title
-
crawl.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) You really should just fast-forward
-
through this part.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And maybe even the whole movie...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Starring...
-
VOICE (CONT'D) This girl
-
VOICE (CONT'D) This Kid
-
VOICE (CONT'D) This other kid
-
VOICE (CONT'D) This Dude
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Who cast this thing?
-
VOICE (CONT'D) Oh the guy from the Daily Show!
-
VOICE (CONT'D) And Slumdog Millionare!
-
VOICE (CONT'D) The Last Airbender
-
VOICE (CONT'D)
-
If you thought this was bad, wait
-
til you see After Earth
-
So, is this the worst M. Night Shyamalan movie?
-
Help us decide
-
by clicking our new Screen Junkies episode.
-
VOICE (CONT'D) "Respect my authoritah!"
-
"There's always money in the banana stand!"
-
"Flawless Victory"
-
"It's clobberin' time!"
-
"You're tearing me apart, Lisa!"
-
"Join me and together we can rule the ga"