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  • Hey what's up everyone it's ya boy Motoki.

  • I have some big news for you today.

  • I finally did it, I got a match on Tinder and a date, let's go.

  • That's right mom, you didn't think I could but I did.

  • So if you're watching this, you can stop saying "oh you'll never have a girlfriend, you'll

  • never find someone, you'll never amount to anything in your life, you're such a disappoint

  • and I wish I never had you"...

  • ... f*ck ...

  • But anyways, it's totally legit guys, okay, we matched on Tinder.

  • Check it out we've been messaging each other, okay, it's totally legit, not fake at all.

  • Yeah you heard me, I can go on dates if I want to, yeah no big deal, whatever.

  • But without further ado, let me introduce you to my date, Melissa.

  • Oh what the f*ck.

  • Aw, there you are!

  • So thank you so much for agreeing to do this video, I know it's kinda weird.

  • I have to admit, I've been wanting to make a tinder date video for quite awhile now

  • but nobody ever matches with me, so thanks for believing in me.

  • When I first asked you if you could be in a video, it was kinda sketch cause like,

  • what if it's a porno right? "Yeah"

  • But, that's for later.

  • To start out, I thought that I could ask you some questions, maybe get to know you a little bit better yeah?

  • "Okay yeah sure" Let's do it.

  • First question, what would your ideal boyfriend be like?

  • "I think he'd have to be fit, funny, and attractive".

  • I mean, I can be those things.

  • Do you want to have kids one day?

  • "Yes I do" Okay, yeah, same.

  • We have so much in common.

  • Would you like kids anytime soon though?

  • "No"

  • F*ck, okay..

  • So next question, what made you get a tinder?

  • "Well, just to make friends and have fun" Okay yeah same.

  • People usually use tinder to hook up but we wouldn't do anything like that.

  • "Of course not"

  • Alright, I stopped recording, you wanna have sex?

  • "Yeah let's go" Aw f*ck yeah.

  • We're kidding guys, okay obviously we're not like that..

  • Think they'll believe that sh*t? "I think we're good".

  • If you could marry any celebrity, who would it be?

  • "Definitely Zac Efron" Oh yeah he's a daddy.

  • What's something you absolutely hate about guys?

  • "Ugh, when they like Donald Trump" Oh true!

  • What is your favorite fruit?

  • "Pineapple" Pineapple, more like, you're a fine apple.

  • What's your favorite body part on a man?

  • "Eyes" Eyes, such bullshit everyone says that.

  • If you couldn't tell, I don't really get the chance to talk to girls, so this is just new for me.

  • "How often do you talk to girls" Pff, like all the time, I'm kidding, totally joking,

  • like every day, weekly, monthly, maybe yearly.

  • So how do you go about getting girls, not for me for course cause obviously I'm chilling,

  • like for anybody who's watching maybe.

  • "Well you gotta compliment them, and be friendly, tend to her every need, put her first,

  • every little thing counts, you gotta get her something every once in awhile, get to know her family,

  • make sure she feels loved, make her feel special and show her respect"

  • You know what I'm just going to stay single for the rest of my life f*ck it.

  • Okay so I want to spice things up a little bit.

  • I have a script here for us. It's a little skit.

  • You down? "Sure"

  • Alright here we go guys, we present to you, The Plumber.

  • "Oh no, my sink doesn’t work any more, I think I need a plumber!

  • Who could that be?"

  • Don't worry!

  • I'm a plumber, and I'm here to take a look at your pipes!

  • "Oh wow, that was fast, thank you."

  • Do you like my big hard tool?

  • "Yeah, that' s really big!"

  • Thanks, I guess should look at your pipes now.

  • Wow, it’s really wet down here.

  • Just how I like it.

  • I think I need to drain my fluids..

  • I mean, the fluids.

  • "Oh yes, please do."

  • First I have to lube these pipes up...

  • There we go.

  • All fixed.

  • Looks like we're all done here.

  • "Thanks so much."

  • Anytime, my pleasure.

  • "Wait it says here that we have to kiss?"

  • I mean if it’s in the script, I guess, you know, we have to, oh darn.

  • "Wait, didn't you write the script?"

  • Shut the fuck up bro what the hell?

  • So what did you think about the date overall?

  • "I mean, it was interesting".

  • I'll take it.

  • How would you score this on like a 1-10?

  • "Four"

  • Aw f*ck.

  • Alright so that's it for this video, actually, I wanted to ask you something.

  • I was thinking that for the thumbnail of this video that maybe you could be kissing my cheek.

  • Just because, I mean, you don't have to..

  • "I mean yeah" Yeah? Ah fuck yeah!

  • I mean, yeah cool.. whatever.

  • Alright let's do it, let's do it.

  • Alright.

  • I'm so f*cking hard right now

  • Well that's pretty much it, thank you guys so much for watching I hoped you enjoyed the video.

  • If you did, please give me a thumbs up to let me know, comment, subscribe if you're

  • not already but otherwise, I'll catch you guys next, Motoki Monday.

  • By the way guys this is totally fake.

  • We're actually friends, and this is to make fun of people who make fake videos like this,

  • but we did match on Tinder..

  • "Plus, I'm lesbian".

Hey what's up everyone it's ya boy Motoki.

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B1 US tinder plumber date script totally pineapple

Meet My Tinder Date

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    Baran posted on 2017/02/22
Video vocabulary