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  • ALL RIGHT, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR JAMES, THE THE RAPIN A SASIN

  • CORDEN!

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

  • >> James: ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.

  • ALL RIGHT.

  • AND THE EMCEE WHOSE TV ROYALTY, DAVID SCHWIMMER-- DPSH AND THE

  • M.C. WHO IS TV ROYALTY, DAVID SCHWIMMER!

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) ALL RIGHT, JAMES, AS HOST, YOU

  • WILL GO FIRST.

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

  • >> James: YOU SURE YOU'RE READY FOR THIS, SCHWIMMER?

  • >> OH YEAH.

  • >> James: JUST REMEMBER, YOU WANTED THIS.

  • ALL RIGHT, JOSH, GIVE ME A BEELT.

  • -- BEETD.

  • MILLENIALS, LET ME INTRODUCE TO YOU THIS GUY.

  • HIS NAME IS DAVID.

  • HE WAS FAMOUS IN '95.

  • CAUSE THAT'S WHEN HE WAS ON TV THEN, NOW IT'S 2016 AND HE HAS

  • NO FRIENDS.

  • GET IT, NO FRIENDS, NOT FAMOUS EVER AGAIN.

  • HE WAS A KARDASHIAN ON TV BUT THAT WAS ONLY FOR PRETEND.

  • YOU PLAYED ROBERT, THAT WAS A GREAT COMBO.

  • WERE YOU SO WHITE YOU SHOULDA PROBABLY PLAYED THE BRONCO.

  • WHAT I'M SAYING IS THIS BATTLES A BLOCKBUSTER SO I'M SAD YOU I

  • KNOW YOU'RE GONNA SPIT SOMETHING LACK LUSTER, BUT NOW YOU GET THE

  • CHANCE TO PROVE YOU GOT BALLS, WHILE I IGNORE YOU LIKE JENNIFER

  • ANISTON DOES YOUR CALLS.

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) Z .

  • >> A BRIT IN AMERICA'S YOUR ONE CLAIM TO FAME, WE ALL KNOW AS AN

  • ACTOR YOUR ROLES WERE ALL THE SAME.

  • THE HEAVY BEST FRIEND, THE HUMOROUS SIDE KICK WITH A BELLY

  • SO BIG YOU CAN'T FIND YOUR OWN-- DIKEN, THE AUTHOR WE ALL

  • RED AS KIDS, HE'S BRITISH LIKE YOU, BUT PEOPLE KNOW WHO HE.

  • IS YOU MUST BE A MASOCHIST, YOU WANT TO BATTLE ME.

  • THIS WON'T END WELL, MATE, IT'S NOT LOVE, ACTUALLY.

  • TO BE CLEAR, I LOVE THE ENGLISH, I MARRIED YOUR KIND, BUT WHY

  • YOUR WIFE CHOSE YOU, MY BAD, SHE BLIND?

  • IS SHE BLIND?

  • RAP WAS BORN IN THIS COUNTRY, YOU ARE A TOURIST HERE, DO US A

  • FAVOR, JAMES, JUST CHANGE YOUR CAREER.

  • >> James: OH, COME ON, DAVID SCHWIMMER, HOW ARE YOU SUCH A

  • LOSER WHEN YOUR NAME RHYMES WITH WINNER?

  • YOU'RE SO NOTE WITH EVERY ROLE THAT YOU PLAY.

  • I'M LIKE HEY, I DIDN'T KNOW ROSS FROM FRIENDS NEW O.J.

  • I'M A FAST CAR, QUICKLY PASSING NEW NASCAR.

  • I'M AN ANIMAL, YOU JUST VOICED ONE IN MAD GAS CAR, OH, HE'S

  • SURPRISED, DIDN'T KNOW THAT I COULD SAY, WHAT'S THE MATTER?

  • NO ONE TOLD YOU LIFE WAS GONNA BE THIS WAY?

  • AND ONE LAST THING, YOU'RE NOT A TRUE M.C.

  • I [BLEEP] DESTROYED YOU, THIS IS MUST SEE TV.

  • I'M SORRY THIS BATTLE LEFT YOU SO BLUE, BUT UNLIKE THIS CROWD,

  • I'LL BE THERE FOR YOU.

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> DESTROY ME?

  • PLEASE, YOUR RHYMES TOTALLY BLEW.

  • I WORKED WITH A MONKEY HAD MORE SKILLS THAN YOU.

  • I'M NOT WORRIED, NO ONE HEARD A WORD THAT YOU SAID.

  • THE ONLY PEOPLE WATCH YOUR SHOW ARE ASLEEP OR DEAD.

  • YOU'RE LATE NIGHT ON PRIME TIME, YOU'RE QUOLA I'M FINE WINE.

  • GO HOME, YOU'RE DONE, THIS BATTLE IS MINE.

  • DID YOU THINK I WOULD BE SCARED WALK AROUND GINGERLY?

  • WHEN EVERYONE KNOWS YOUR MIDDLE NAME'S KIMBERLY?

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) I'M TALL AND LEAN, YOU'RE SHORT

  • AND STOUT, THEY KNOW ME IN JAPAN, THEY KNOW YOU AT IN N

  • OUT, YOU BARYM RASS YOUR COUNTRY, THIS WAS EASY FOR ME,

  • BITCH, LAY DOWN THE MIC, AND GO MAKE ME SOME TEA.

  • ONE CREAM, ONE SUGAR.

  • >> Reggie: SO WHO IS YOUR WINNER?

  • OH WAIT A MINUTE.

  • WE HAVE A NEW CONTENDER.

  • LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, PLEASE WELCOME REBEL WILSON!

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE) >> ALL RIGHT, STOP, ENOUGH OF

  • THIS CLAPPING.

  • WHY THE HELL DO YOU WANTA HEAR TWO WHITE MEN RAPPING.

  • I'M THE REBEL M.C., I'M CLAK A LACKIN, I COME PACKING BOOBS,

  • SHOW YOU DUDES WHAT YOU'RE LACKING, DAVID YOUR CAREER SAY

  • HUGE MISTAKE.

  • IT'S LIKE ROSS AND RACHEL, IT'S ON A BREAK.

  • ALL JOKE AS SIDE, MAN, I THINK YOU'RE GREAT.

  • I'M YOUR BIGGEST FAN, WHEN I WAS 8.

  • CARPOOL KARAOKE, YOU THINK IT'S YOUR BIG THING, BUT EVERYONE IS

  • THINKING SHUT UP AND LET ADELE SING.

  • YOU SPEAK ENGLISH BUT YOU CAN'T EVEN RAP, YOUR RHYMES ARE

  • NONEXISTENT LIKE MY INNER THIGH GAP.

  • DON'T BATTLE ME, CUZ YOU KNOW IT'S NOT WORTH IT, EVERYBODY

  • KNOWS MY RHYMES ARE PITCH PERFECT!

  • (CHEERS AND APPLAUSE).

  • >> Reggie: THE WINNER OF DROP THE MIC, REBEL WILSON!

  • >> James: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, REBEL WILSON AND

  • DAVID SCHWIMMER, COME ON BACK, EVERYBODY.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR JAMES, THE THE RAPIN A SASIN

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Drop the Mic v. David Schwimmer and Rebel Wilson

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    Jhang Sean posted on 2016/05/29
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