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  • Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business

  • and life you love so much. And today it’s Q&A Tuesday, that’s right.

  • Today’s question comes from E. and she writes:

  • Hello Marie, I hope this message finds you well. My question is,

  • how do I effectively get my point across to others and have it taken seriously?

  • It seems as though I’m speaking Greek or something. I send emails, I speak up in meetings, and I’m ignored.

  • My intention is to provide solutions to problems with innovative ideas in order to reach and or exceed goals.

  • This is not just in my work life, but also in my personal life.

  • It’s frustrating that I can’t get through to those I care about. I would love to hear your perspective.

  • Sincerely, E.”

  • Great question, E. So let’s start off by recognizing that there’s two categories here

  • things you can control and things you can’t. In the camp of things you can’t

  • you have to recognize that no matter how brilliant your ideas are, there’s always gonna be

  • some people who just have no interest in hearing about them. This is true for both in your work life

  • and in your personal life. So it doesn't matter how great your ideas are or

  • how wonderful of a communicator you are, you cannot make someone listen to your ideas

  • if theyre just not interested.

  • Now, let’s move on to the more fun category: things we can control. Like it or not,

  • we all have communication patterns that undermine our power and authority. I have them too and

  • I’m always trying to keep an eye out to form better habits

  • because making some small tweaks in the way that we communicate can make a world of difference in making sure

  • that we are taken seriously. So while this list isn’t exhaustive,

  • itll really help you become a more powerful and persuasive communicator.

  • Number one is don't use too many fancy words. Why? Because it obscures your message and

  • it also weakens the chance that youre going to be understood and taken seriously.

  • Here’s an example.

  • Individuals consciously recognize it when you are attempting in an overly strenuous way,

  • by utilizing complex verbiage, to impress upon them that you are intelligent and/or sophisticated.

  • javascript:;In other words, people know when you're trying too hard to sound smart.

  • You even danced on the edge of it a little bit in your question when you wrote,

  • My intention is to provide solutions to problems with innovative ideas in order to reach and/or exceed goals.”

  • Right there you went from sounding like a totally relatable human being to sounding

  • like a business robot. So when in doubt, use simple words and get right to the point.

  • Number two is lose the dumb disclaimer. So you know this one, right?

  • We all start off a sentence by saying, “Well, this might be dumb but…” or, “This might be silly, but…”

  • or, “This might be way off base, but…” Basically we use the dumb disclaimer

  • any time that were not sure about what were about to say or as a preemptive move

  • if we think that other people aren’t gonna like it.

  • We figure if we call it dumb before anyone else does, the rejection will hurt less.

  • But the truth is, all that disclaimer does is undercut your power, so stop doing it.

  • Instead you wanna try something neutral like, “How about this idea?” or, “What about this?”

  • Number three is turnyea butintoyes and.” It’s a natural habit when any of us hear something,

  • we disagree and then we wanna add our perspective, what we think is right,

  • to say, “Yeah, but…” But you have to realize this: anything that’s followed

  • by a but is gonna kick up someone else’s defences whether youre in your personal life

  • or in a creative meeting.

  • For example, “I think that’s a good idea, but…” or, “I love hanging out with you,

  • but…” Listen to how different it sounds when you say, “I think that’s a good idea,

  • and…” as in, “I think that’s a good idea, and here’s another perspective.”

  • Or, “I love hanging out with you, and I think we’d have even more fun if…”

  • Now, of course if you strongly disagree with something, then just disagree. However,

  • if you haven’t been invited to offer your opinions and you're really trying to get a seat at the table,

  • usingyes andcan help you get your ideas heard.

  • Number four is be a knocker. So before you bust through that door with your big innovative ideas

  • it’s a good idea to give a little knock knock, and here’s how you do it.

  • You ask someone, are you open to a suggestion for this? Or would you like to hear an idea?

  • What this does is get the other person intrigued and makes them feel like

  • theyve invited your feedback rather than getting bulldozed over by you and all your innovation.

  • So don't be a bulldozer, be a knocker, because everybody loves knockers.

  • Number 5 is follow-up. So if you share an idea with the team or you send out a proposal,

  • make sure you follow-up. Most people are so busy, I know I am, and I’m so grateful

  • when people take the initiative and move things ahead. So when you do follow-up,

  • don't be mousey about it and don't say anything like this:

  • Dear Sam, I’m so sorry to bother you - I’m sure youre so busy.

  • By chance, have you had a moment to take a look at what I sent you? If not, no worries,

  • but if it’s not too much trouble, I’d love your feedback. I think it’s possibly a very innovative solution.”

  • Instead you can try something direct and clear like this:

  • Hi Sam. I’m following up on the proposal I sent you last week on a strategy for our social media content.

  • In case you missed it, I’m attaching it again and I’d be happy to walk you through it

  • I know it’s been an ongoing challenge for us and I really think this could solve it.

  • I’d love to see if you agree. If there’s a better time to follow up,

  • let me know and I’ll circle back then.”

  • So there you have it E., 5 solid strategies to help you achieve this tweetable.

  • Communicate powerfully and youll be taken seriously.

  • That was my A to your Q, E., I really hope it helps. Now I would love to hear from you.

  • Have you ever struggled to be taken seriously? If so, what specific change in your communication

  • or approach made the biggest impact? Tell me in the comments below.

  • As always, the best discussions happen after the episode over at MarieForleo.com,

  • so make sure you go there and leave a comment now.

  • Did you like this video? If so, subscribe to our lovely channel and I would be so grateful

  • if you shared this with your friends. And if you want even more resources to create a business

  • and life that you love, plus some personal insights from me that I only talk

  • about in the email, come on over to MarieForleo.com and sign up for email updates.

  • Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special gift that only you have.

  • Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.

Hey, it’s Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business

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5 Reasons People Don’t Take You Seriously

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    Adam Huang posted on 2015/07/26
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