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Alright soldiers, listen up.
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We've got a dirty bomb. And the bastard is planning to use it.
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Our job is to get down there and make sure never get the chance.
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We can't run the risk of spooking them.
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So, we go in hard, fast and quietly.
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There is no room for mistakes.
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But if something goes wrong,
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we've got Sergeant Pugsley.
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Now I know what you're thinking.
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He's a maverick, maybe even a little old.
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But he's the best damn sniper there is.
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Any questions?
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Errr, yeah...
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That's a dog.
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That's not a question private.
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That's a dog?
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Much better.
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Let's move out!
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NO!
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GUYS!
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Hmm, four letters. Sommet you say to express pain.
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Warh!
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Nah, it starts with an A.
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Argh!
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*Shooty shooty silenced bang bangs*
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Er, Sir! Can we talk about Sergeant Pugsley for a minute please.
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That damn maverick.
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Yeah, sure. I'm not really comfortable with him being apart of the team.
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What?
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Y'know on account of the fact that he is a d-Aaa!
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Quiet! How did you find out?
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It's kind of obvious...
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Damn it! Look the others don't need to know...
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About his drinking problem.
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What?
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I don't care if he's a drinker.
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The question is how did he get in the army in the first place?!
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Oh! You want to bring back Don't Ask Don't Tell?!
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If the question is "Are you a dog?" then YES!
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You won't be so quick to judge when Sergeant Pugsley is saving you from an
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AMBUSH!
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*Fighty fighty punch shoot*
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He doesn't even have thumbs!
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LEAVE YOUR PREJUDICES AT HOME SOLDIER!!
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(In a high pitched voice) IT'S AN AMBUSH!!
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*More shooty bang bang*
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*Pug*
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*Mass amounts of the shooty bang*
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Dammit Pugsley!
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Why didn't you warn us?!
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BECAUSE HE CAN'T TALK!
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*Shooty deathy bang bang*
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OF COURSE! That damn maverick has a plan!
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That son of a bitch has balls!
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No he doesn't! HE DOESN'T HAVE BALLS!
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Ooooh! Is that a problem?!
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I mean, they were cut off!!
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(In a high pitched voice) Oooh! Is that a problem?!
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NOT NOW PRIVATE NO PRIVATES!!
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Dammit Pugsley where is our cover fire!
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SIR, THERE IS NO COVER FIRE BECAUSE DOGS CAN'T FIRE GUNS!
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I MEAN WHAT'S NEXT A HAMSTER IN A PLANE?!
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Don't be ridiculous!
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(In mourning) Captain Squeakers.
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*Guns clock*
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Alright, I admit it...
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Sergeant Pugsley...
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Is a dog.
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Yeah.
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(In a high pitched voice) WHAT?!
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He may well be a dog...
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And an alcoholic.
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He also poops outdoors, but by God!
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He's the best damn soldier i've ever had the privilege of w-
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You just couldn't afford a dog sitter, could you?
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They're really expensive...
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*Shooty bang! Shooty bang!*
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He is a maverick!
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Who's a good boy?!
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It's you!
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Meow.
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You couldn't save us all Pugsley.