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  • [theme music]

  • -I had a great time.

  • -Me too.

  • Well, this is me.

  • [heartbeat]

  • -What are you two playing at?

  • -It's not me.

  • It's-- it's her.

  • I have first claim on all new prey.

  • -He's not your prey.

  • He's my boyfriend.

  • -And its my castle, so I'll bite who I want to.

  • Hmph.

  • -Look, Ingrid.

  • Perhaps you should stay away from Will.

  • This close to your transformation

  • you've got no control over your powers.

  • -You worry too much.

  • I meant to do it.

  • -That's Will again.

  • Don't answer it.

  • -He's my boyfriend, and no one is

  • going to stop me kissing him good night.

  • If you tell anyone about this, bat-breath,

  • I will chop off your tongue and feed it to Renfield.

  • -I think I'm in love.

  • Read.

  • -The Staff of Carpathia, a new attraction at Stokely Museum.

  • Legend has it that one blow from the staff

  • will cure the curse of vampirism.

  • Robin, this is brilliant!

  • -Huh?

  • Oh yeah.

  • -Come on.

  • -Thanks for coming today, Chloe.

  • I really appreciate it.

  • -Who couldn't resist the chance to authenticate

  • a historical artifact like the staff?

  • -Out of everyone I know, just you.

  • -Oh, map!

  • -I don't suppose Ingrid--

  • -She thought you were Will.

  • Get over it.

  • -I know, but.

  • -Shh.

  • Right, so we're here, and the staff is there.

  • Anyone know which way to go?

  • Good.

  • -It's this way.

  • -I'd go with her.

  • She's usually right.

  • -When I suggested a family day out,

  • this isn't quite what I had in mind.

  • -Well, on a Sunday in Stokely, it's

  • either the museum or the bowling alley.

  • -Oh, well I like bowling.

  • -I'm banned.

  • There was a theme night.

  • Some of the staff were dressed up as vampires.

  • You don't want to know the details.

  • -Some of these exhibits

  • -Calm down, Jonno.

  • They're not real.

  • -Are you sure it was the count?

  • -Yes.

  • -I knew it.

  • He's out to destroy the Staff of Carpathia.

  • -Well, you can't go after him.

  • Mum will go mad.

  • -Leave your mother to me.

  • Honestly, Jon.

  • You're getting a bit old for that, aren't you?

  • -What's this?

  • -Jonathan wants to play hide and see in the museum

  • like we did when he was little.

  • All right.

  • Just this once.

  • Count to 100 and come and find me.

  • -I don't know.

  • Screaming at the exhibits?

  • Playing hide and seek?

  • We're going to have to toughen you up a bit.

  • -It's down there and left at the severed head.

  • -Ugh.

  • It really smells like the plague in here.

  • -It's sort of familiar though.

  • -Moldy cabbage with a hint of toejam.

  • -Yeah.

  • Week old armpit sweat.

  • -Renfield.

  • -Put those rats down.

  • -What rats?

  • Ow!

  • Ow, ow, ow, ow ow.

  • -What are you doing here?

  • -Nothing.

  • -Where's dad.

  • -I lost him.

  • Um-- but he's definitely not here,

  • and we're not after the staff.

  • -If your dad's after the staff--

  • -That means it's got to be for real.

  • Thanks, Renfield.

  • -Please, don't tell Master.

  • You forced it out of me.

  • Ow!

  • -Oi, Ozzy Osbourne.

  • Keep away from the exhibits.

  • -You may address me as Count.

  • -Oh?

  • Really?

  • Well, Count, rules is rules.

  • Now back off.

  • Oi.

  • I told you.

  • Stay away from the exhibits.

  • Go on then.

  • [bell rings]

  • -Cool.

  • Who says I can't control my powers?

  • [bell rings]

  • Isn't anyone going to get that?

  • COUNT: Put that down.

  • -How did he--

  • COUNT: I said, put it down.

  • -What did I-- Where are you?

  • [chuckling]

  • COUNT: I'm in your body, you fool.

  • -You seriously expect me to believe that?

  • COUNT: Look in the display cabinet.

  • [screaming]

  • [bell ringing]

  • -Do I have to do everything around here?

  • To be opened by Count Dracula only.

  • In your dreams.

  • -Leave that alone.

  • You should have seen your face.

  • You'll regret that, you mangy mutt.

  • -The staff's still here.

  • -So's my dad.

  • Dad?

  • Dad?

  • -Sorry, Vlad.

  • I think your dad's dead.

  • -Well, of course, he is.

  • He's been dead for 600 years.

  • This is an old vampire party trick.

  • Their lifeforces can leave their bodies.

  • -So he could be anywhere?

  • -Pretty much.

  • He'd never for far, unless he was in trouble.

  • I have to find him.

  • You two look after his body.

  • -Body?

  • We'll have to move him.

  • -I'm not touching it.

  • -Where do you hold a vampire?

  • -80, 81--

  • -Shouldn't you be counting to 105 or something?

  • -I always give him loads of time.

  • He's rubbish at hiding.

  • -I know.

  • I would always find my Christmas presents.

  • -Mum?

  • -Mhm?

  • -You going to be

  • -Of course, now that your dad's given up that vampire nonsense.

  • He has given it up, hasn't he?

  • -Yeah.

  • You know what?

  • I'm going to stop him-- find him.

  • -So Daddy's got a brand new throne?

  • Wouldn't he just hate it if I sit on it first?

  • -I don't think you should do that.

  • -Good job it's not up to you then, isn't it, furball?

  • Now get lost.

  • Did I just do that?

  • Sweet.

  • -Out!

  • [inaudible] I'm sorry.

  • I didn't mean-- Or I'll drain all your blood!

  • [chuckling] Will you stop that?

  • Sorry.

  • Ugh!

  • -What do you mean "ugh?"

  • Look at me!

  • I haven't seen my reflection for 600 years!

  • -That's the face of pure, unadulterated evil!

  • -Yes, yes.

  • Obviously.

  • But look at the bone structure, those brooding eyes!

  • -We'll just sniff in here for a quick snack.

  • You'll be elevensies, and you'll be half elevensies.

  • And then we'll find the Master.

  • -Get out.

  • Get out of my body now!

  • -And where do you suggest I go?

  • -Him!

  • You can go into him!

  • -I would rather be stuck inside a rotting badger.

  • -What have you done, you--

  • -Oh dear.

  • [screaming]

  • -Dad.

  • -Dad.

  • -Oh, this is bad.

  • -Dad?

  • What happened?

  • -The Count's lifeforce is trapped inside me.

  • So his body's defenseless.

  • Go to the Staff of Carpathia exhibit and--

  • -Give him a nice bar of chocolate.

  • -Bar of chocolate?

  • -No.

  • I didn't say that.

  • It was the Count talking.

  • I meant-- [stuttering]

  • -Sing to him.

  • [laughter]

  • -No.

  • -You mean stake him?

  • -Yes.

  • -No.

  • -Yes.

  • -No.

  • -Yes!

  • -Don't even think about it.

  • -Try and stop me.

  • -That's my boy.

  • -J'ai mal a la tete.

  • -Oh dear.

  • That bang on the head's turned him French again.

  • Renfield, go find the staff of Carpathia.

  • -Huh?

  • -Allez chercher la Baton de Carpathie, vite.

  • -Uh-- oui, Maitre.

  • -I don't even speak French.

  • -Hm.

  • You'd be surprised at what you can do now I've moved in.

  • How do you fancy draining the blood from a large mammal?

  • [laughter]

  • -Oi!

  • No running!

  • -He's gone.

  • -Well, I'm going to find him and turn him into dust.

  • -Not if I find him first.

  • -I said, no running!

  • -Doesn't seem right leaving Count Dracula in a boiler room.

  • -I'll be fine.

  • Just leave me a bottle of blood-- bottle of blood.

  • -You do know, his lifeforce could

  • be looking at you right now.

  • -Sorry.

  • -Candles on.

  • Candles off.

  • Candles on.

  • Candles off.

  • This is so great.

  • Candles on.

  • -Hm?

  • -I am so undead.

  • -I don't want to say I told you so.

  • But I told you so.