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Cheese.
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Oh my God, you guys are so Asian right now.
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I'm gonna be Asian too.
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So where are you from?
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I'm from Texas.
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No, I mean like where are your parents from?
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You know, you're pretty tall for an Asian.
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Oh, they're from Korea.
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Where are your parents from?
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Michigan.
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No, where are your parents' ancestors from?
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I don't know, like Europe?
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I just wanted to introduce you to Eugene over here.
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Eugene, say hi to Stacy.
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Hi Stacy.
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Yeah, well Stacy's really into Asian guys so I figured it'd be a nice...
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It is so nice to finally meet your girlfriend!
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Yeah, so me and my friend were at 99 Ranch and...
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What's 99 Ranch?
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Actually, I'm his sister.
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Yeah, this is my girlfriend.
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You don't know what 99 Ranch is?
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Oh, it's that new bar, right?
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Oh, such a banana.
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So anyways, yeah.
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Um, I don't speak Mandarin, do you?
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No, sorry.
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So you're Chinese.
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Taiwanese, actually.
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You speak Cantonese.
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Mandarin.
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You know my cousin's wife is Oriental.
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Ah, so she's a rug.
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Are you North or South Korean?
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South.
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How can you tell?
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Because I'm not trapped in North Korea.
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No, she's from the Orient.
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The Orient, ah, so we're in the 1950's right now.
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I'd be the Red Ranger.
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I'd be the Blue Ranger.
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You're the Yellow Ranger!
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How do I change this setting?
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Are you serious?
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Yeah, I just got this phone.
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You're like a bad Asian.
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So my mom was like (with Korean accent) "Eugene"
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"Why are you so skinny?"
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You can say that?
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That feels like a little bit racist.
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I mean it's...
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Were your parents upset that you wanted to go into entertainment?
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Of course! 'Cause I'm Asian you think that my parents want me to be a doctor or a lawyer or engineer.
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OK, that's like a little racist, but it's cool.
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So she was like (with Korean accent) "Oh, Eugene..."
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No, no, you can't do it though.
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Oh, OK, fair.
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Oh, I wasn't trying to be offensive, it's good that they're cool with it, though.
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Nah, they wanted me to be a doctor.
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Take a selfie with me.
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Yeah Mom, that was my new girlfriend.
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Uh no, she's not Korean.
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I'm so glad I have minority friends.
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All my pictures are with White people.
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Uh, you know, technically Asians are the majority.
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There are literally billions of us in the world.
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Oh, OK, smile!
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Oh my God, I love that new HBO show.
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It's so diverse.
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Yeah, there are no Asians on it.
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Hey Eugene, what's 28 times 72?
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Yeah, but there are two Black people!
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And an Asian receptionist.
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I don't know, it's like 1,500.
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OK, thanks.
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Are we all in the frame?
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Yeah, you're on, you're all in.
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I just had this thought.
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If we had a baby together,
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it would be the most beautiful half-Asian baby in the entire world.
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Right?
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Yes, definitely.
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It would totally be half Asian.
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Dude, in general half-Asian people are the most beautiful.
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Oh my God, I had the best pho last night.
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You mean pho.
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Yeah, pho.
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Hey Eugene, I saw your "Awkward Moments Only Asians Understand" vid.
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As an Indian, where was the rest of Asia?
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I went with my girlfriend Tammy Nguyen, do you know her?
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Nguyen?
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I don't know, I think probably around eight o'clock.
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So, you might wanna think about that next time you label something Asian.
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Gah, this is awkward.
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Is that your brother?
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What?
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It's all on you.
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It's all on your cow!
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Down Bastian!
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I am the great, stolen Dragon!
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Yup, you are.