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"How To Speak To People: Better Communication Skills."
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Hello and welcome to VideoJug.
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I'm Rebecca Fensome, and I'm a life coach.
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Being a great communicator is important in all areas of our life.
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Whether we're talking to our partners,
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or friends, or work colleagues.
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Being able to inspire other individuals through your communication
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will allow you to have a more fruitful and enriching life.
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Here are my top tips to being a good communicator.
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Tip 1.
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Use open-ended questions.
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In order to get a communication going,
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it's really useful to use open-ended questions.
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Open-ended questions often start with words such as:
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what, when, how, and why.
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An example of an open-ended question is:
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"So what do you like doing in your spare time?"
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"I love cinema, theatre, and sports."
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It's best to avoid what we call closed questions.
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An example of a closed question is:
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"Do you like films?"
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"Yes, I do."
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A closed question kills the conversation
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because it can only be answered with a yes or no answer.
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Careful using these open-ended questions
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will ensure that the conversation continues to flow.
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Tip two.
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Active listening.
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This is a really useful technique.
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As it tells the other person that you really listened to what they've been saying,
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and also, more importantly,
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that you've understood.
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"The hours are quite long."
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"The work's really repetitive."
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"My boss doesn't appreciate me."
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If you've been listening actively,
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at this point you should now be able to summarize what the individual has just told you.
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"It sounds like you aren't really satisfied in your job anymore."
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Tip 3.
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The cocoon.
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Sometimes when people are talking to us we find it hard to concentrate on what they're saying.
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It might be that there's some background noise,
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or our mind is elsewhere.
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In order to help you with this,
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visualize a cocoon around the two of you.
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This will allow you to focus in on every word that they're saying to you.
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Tip four.
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Engage with the other person.
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If someone is trying to engage you in conversation,
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your body language is really important.
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"Tom I need your advice."
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"Uh huh."
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Don't continue with the task that you're already doing.
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Don't shout the answer over your shoulder.
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"Tom, Tom!"
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"I need your advice."
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"Sorry, um....."
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Instead what we need to do, is stop what you're doing,
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turn around and face that individual and give them the time they deserve.
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"Tom, I need your advice."
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"Of course, what is it?"
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Good communication style is when you really engage with the other individual.
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Tip 5.
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Don't make assumptions.
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Don't jump to conclusions when you're having a conversation with someone.
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Don't assume you know what they're thinking or feeling about a particular topic.
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It seems you'll be alright there.
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Instead, it is much better to ask them:
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if they're okay with this, if they feel alright about that.
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You really going to take into consideration that person's thoughts and beliefs
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rather than projecting your own thoughts or feelings on them.
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Tip 6.
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Avoid antagonistic sentences.
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An example of antagonistic sentence is:
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"You're sitting in my chair"
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An antagonistic sentence can be seen as a form of attack.
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So it's much better and more constructive instead to use sentences such as:
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"Excuse me, I think you've taken my seat."
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This is less confrontational.
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which will mean your life is full of a lot less conflicts.