Subtitles section Play video Print subtitles - I'm an actor! I'm a (bleep) actor! I'm a real actor! I did Richard III! I was in True West with Sherman Hemsley! I was in Die Hard, dammit! (bleep) Steve Urkel (bleep). - You will suck Steve Urkel's (bleep) if we want you to. You will suck his (bleep), do you understand? He is our bread and butter, you mother (bleep). ♪ Crazy, crazy ♪ ♪ Does is crazy. ♪ (old western music) - You sold me out, son. Now you're going to end up with a bullet in your head for it. - You can't play me, mother (bleep). I'm a mother (bleep) that plays mother (bleep), mother (bleep). - Cut. (bell rings) - [Crew Member] All right, everybody, let's get reset. We are going again. - Nigel. That's great. - Oh, great. It's smashing. Thank you so much. Yeah, well, it's been an absolute honor, and what a great opportunity to be here to be able to play an American tough-- - Well, I'm just so glad that we got you out of that BBC commitment so you can play with us. - Cheers mate. Cheers. Cheers. - Antoine, listen, I'm just not buying that you're someone that was born and raised in the streets of Brooklyn. - That's weird 'cause I actually was born and raised in the streets of Brooklyn. I was in a gang and everything. Most of this stuff actually happened to me. - Wow. Okay. Well, that's great for us, 'cause I want you to use it, okay? It was a good first take. Let's just, let's get going. Let's get going. Thank you, Jim. - Scene five, take two. (bell rings) - [Jim] And action! - You sold me out, son. Now son now you're going to end up with a bullet in your head for it. - You can't play me mother (bleep). I'm the mother (bleep) that plays mother (bleep), mother (bleep). - Cut. Cut. Okay. Nigel, that was great. Brilliant. Just the way you move, especially when you talk, I just really see this character coming to life before my eyes. It's fabulous. - Cheers, mate. Cheers. - It's fabulous. Antoine, your performance, it's just not quite there yet, okay? I really need to see you make more of a transformation. Okay? Like Nigel here. - That dude's British. - Antoine, if I might jump in with a bit of advice. - I don't think I need that. - No, no, no. Look, hear him out. - Maybe you might want to try thinking of something in the material that's similar to something that's happened in your real life. For me, for instance, I like to think of when me mum wanted me to attend prep school in Leeds to become a barrister, but I wanted to study the theater at Oxford. - Thank God. - And so that was a conundrum, really, for me. - I'm gonna stop you right there, 'cause it's just confusing me. Right? Like I don't need that, 'cause I am from the streets. I was in a gang. They told me to kill my cousin. - It might be a bit spot on, no? - Yeah. It's a bit spot on. Do you have any stories that involve your mum? - What's a mum? - Oh, dear. - Scene five, take three. (bell rings) Okay. - Antoine, remember, you're a gangster. Okay? Betrayal. The streets. Okay? Nigel you're perfect. Antoine, transform. And action! - You sold me out, son. Now you're going to get a bullet up in your head for it. - You can't play me mother (bleep). I'm the mother (bleep) that plays mother (bleep), mother (bleep). - He's boring to watch. Cut. - That does not sound good. - Antoine, I do not feel like you have found the emotional core of this character. - Man (bleep) this. Nobody is more real to me. Okay? I come from the streets, and nobody's going to tell me what the streets is like. Nobody. You understand? - That's a great speech. I just wish that I believed it. You wanna give it a shot? - Sure, I'll have a go. Man (bleep) this. I'm as real as it gets. - Yes! - This (bleep) streets is for real. I'm up in there, man. - You are. - I'm (bleep) from the (bleep), from the Earth from the streets. Something to that defense, yes. - No, but I'm so with you. I'm with you when you say that, even when you're saying the wrong words. I just wish you could do that. - You know what? (Jim groans) - Oh, goodness. - Okay. That hurts. But I don't feel that it comes from the right emotional place for the character. All right? Here, give it a shot. Watch. Watch. (Jim groans) That's great. I feel that in here and in here. - That's very gracious of-- - In my heart. - To say that. - Try that again. (Jim groans) I just, I don't believe you. - Call my agent. (phone rings) - Jaden Pinkett Smith, my man. - What up, Clyde. Hey, look, man, I'm going to be real with you, okay? This Alien Boys script. I'm not feeling it. I mean, it's hard being Will Smith's son. I just want to make sure my next project reflects I'm a down to earth, normal kid. Am I making any sense? - Yeah, yeah. I'm reading you loud and clear. I've got a script right here, very real, called "Street Ball." - Talk to me. - Okay. So you play Tony. He's a kid from the streets, lives in the hood, in a house with his mom. - Stop. House? - Oh, it's like a tiny mansion. - Got it. Go on. - So his mom and he, they live in this house and she works at a supermarket. - Stop! - [Clyde] Oh, yeah. A supermarket's like a mansion, but it's full of food and anyone could go there. - So like where the butlers go? - [Clyde] Yeah, basically. So, he-- - And wait, you said his mom was doing something at the supermarket? - Working. - So. - Well, working is kind of like acting on a set every day in a film that no one's ever gonna see, and it lasts for the rest of your life. - Oh, like a maid? - [Clyde] Yeah. Yeah. She's like the maid of the supermarket. Awesome. Continue. - So, anyway, Tony doesn't make the basketball team. Right? So he decides to start playing pickup games of street ball outside. - So he plays basketball in his plane? - [Clyde] No, on the ground. - In his limo? - No, outside is that stuff that goes by when you're inside the limo. - Oh snap. He plays basketball outside the limo door? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So then he gets really good at basketball, and, then, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, fast forward, at the heart of the story, Tony has to choose between his mom-- - Choose? - Yeah, choose is when you have to make a decision between two things you want, but you can have only one. - But there's two. - Yeah. But, I mean, he can't have both. - What did I say about science fiction, Clyde? It's a no. - Okay. We'll pass. (Clyde sneezes) - Dad bless you. - Thanks. - Okay, guys, Gremlins 2. I'm telling you, this movie should write itself. First one was a classic, this should be pretty straightforward. Basically, all we're doing is maintaining the integrity of the original picture. We want to do all this stuff with the water, and the... Can we help you? - Oh, sorry. Let me introduce myself. Hi, y'all, my name is Star Magic Jackson Jr. I'm the Hollywood Sequel Doctor. So studios just brings me in to oversee things when they about to drop a deuce. So that's why I'm here, but don't mind me. I'm just going to be over here. Y'all do your thing. It's your movie. - Okay. Let's brainstorm. Adam? - If it's gonna take place in an office building, I was thinking what if Gizmo gets too wet from the water cooler this time? - Okay. Hold on a second. I'm sorry. I'm going to have to step in here. Just one second, sweetheart. So what's wrong with y'all? Y'all looking like a bunch of sad sacks. This is G2, people. We're writin' Gremlins 2, It should be a party with pizza and anchovies, pineapple.