crying at parks,

Alfonso Ribeiro,

spending time at Arby's when they're not eating.

It's a mess.

Thankfully, I'm here to help.

Now why am I qualified?

Coz I've got a a gender neutral haircut,

a popular podcast, and time to kill.

I'm still in community college.

This is Man Up.

(rock music)

This week I got a call from Lauren in Culver City,

or Lau-ren, as she says it.

And she said that her and her man

are having some commitment issues,

something I know a lot about.

I think I do.

I don't know if I do,

I can't even, fuck,

I can't even commit to this.

(upbeat music)

What's up man? I'm Theo.

- Hey, how's it going?

- Good, nice to see you today.

Lauren, how are you?

- Hi, I'm good.

How are you?

- Very lovely.

Thank you guys for meeting me out here.

Obviously we arranged to meet you guys out here,

by this ledge.

Lauren's reached out to me via my podcast,

which is about helping men

take that (screeches) off the universe

and really get that, you know,

that male gestation going on inside of our lungs and heart.

- So, I called Theo because you

bought an engagement ring.

- This is true.

I did.

- A year ago and you've been sitting on it.

- Yeah.

- You've been mother henning that thing.

They call that mother henning.

- Do they?

Okay.

- And, I feel like you thought that

you could just buy it and mother hen it,

instead of taking that next step to actually propose.

Like, you act like you've proposed already.

But you haven't.

- Well, I wouldn't say I act like I proposed

because, I mean, I'm not strutting around

you know, talking like I'm--

- You act like it's a huge step though.

- Well, it was kind of a--

- The huge step would actually be proposing.

- It was an interim step, you know?

- Okay.

It shouldn't take a year.

- You're probably right about that.

- As men we have a lot of invisible hurdles,

some of them that you can't even see as women,

just coz we have our own blinders on.

You know we're the only animal in the kingdom

that runs forward at top speed with blinders on.

You can't name another animal that can do that,

unless it's a blind animal.

Buying a wedding ring

and not giving it to a girl is,

well now you're just a dude that owns a ring,

a jewelry boy.

Alright so this is streets of?

- Rogue, yeah.

Streets of Rogue, this is my baby.

- And you made this.

- Yeah, over the course of four plus years.

- Wow.

How many levels are on this game.

- 15, I'd say.

- And so if asking Lauren to marry you is like level 15,

what level do you feel like you're on?

Honestly.

- Probably 14 and three quarters ish.

I mean, it's pretty close.

But here's the thing,

it's been on 14 and three quarters

for like a year or two.

- Wow, how much sex were you getting

before you guys settled down.

Do you feel like you got enough sex

out there in the world?

- I mean, I wasn't the best at dating.

I don't think, it wasn't the worst,

but, you know, I'm no player, you know?

- Yeah, I was good at dating,

but I wasn't good at sex.

- Oh.

- I am the worst at sex.

I'm very bad.

- Yeah, what do you think the problem is there?

- I just get nervous.

I'm like one of those,

you ever seen those animals that

faint when they get nervous, you know?

- (laughs) No.

What animals are these?

- Yeah they're like goats on the internet,

and they faint when they get nervous,

and that's how I am,

like I hold my breath when I'm having sex,

and then Ill just kinda faint.

- It's a problem.

- Yeah, I'm not that good at it.

It sounds like he thinks his ding

hasn't had enough ling, you know?

He hadn't done enough tippy-tappy

in that drippy-drappy.

(ambient music)

You've been sitting on the ring for

2 and a half years, right?

- Yeah.

- If you're afraid to make that jump,

one of the reasons could be

because you're worried about,

not being able to be single again.

- Right.

- So I thought I'd give you the environment

of what it's like to be single.

- Yeah it's not really an environment

that I'm familiar with--

- That's okay.

I don't think anybody is comfortable in it,

you know?

I think sometimes that's just

this idea we have that

there's a guy out there

that's comfortable in this.

Only a shark is comfortable in these waters,

you know?

It's not that hard.

Hey, how's it going?

- Oh, hi, sorry.

- Sorry I'm gonna wave my hand at you.

I'm not a harassment person.

- I'm Courtney, nice to meet you.

- Theo. Nice to see you.

This is my friend Matt.

- Hey.

- Hi Matt, how are you?

- How's it going?

- Good.

- I have, actually, adult asthma.

- Oh no.

- Do you have it?

- I don't, no.

- I thought we might have some of the same

issues and diseases.

- Oh, no.

Have a good night.

- Okay, if you see me struggling to breathe,

you know what's up.

So, I think it went okay.

- Yeah, it went alright.

It's a little weird.

- Yeah. Here's the thing,

she hated me before she got here.

She'll hate me later.

But I conversated, I won right?

- Yeah.

- So at least if I go home tonight,

and masturbate by myself,

at least I still have her voice in my ears.

- Yeah.

- You feel me?

- Yeah, I mean, you're still a winner in that sense.

- Yes, you gotta take a win where you can get a win, right?

- Yeah.

- So being single is just about

getting little wins.

So to have that single vibe,

you can go out in here,

I want you to meet a couple of girls.

- We gonna go together, or?

- I'm gonna stay here and hold down the nest,

you know?

- God, I'm a jar of just,

I don't even know.

I'm, God, freaking the fuck out right now.

- Are you really?

- Yeah.

- You're fine.

Bro, you're big semen, I'm big semen.

We were semen look how far we've come.

- Semen?

- You got this.

- Alright.

(upbeat music)

- Hi.

- Hi.

- I'm Matt.

- Hi, Brie

- Good to meet you, Brie.

- Jess.

- Jess, hey, good to meet you, Matt.

- Nice to meet you too.

- Hey, so how's it going tonight?

- Good, how are you?

- Not bad.

Can't complain too much.

You guys having a girls' night here?

- Yeah, we are actually.

- I could maybe do that.

(women laugh)

What's the plans here?

- Probably go to Malibu.

- The Bu?

Okay, that sounds like fun.

You guys gonna do like lines of cocaine there

and all kinds of crazy crap?

- Yeah.

- I'm sorry, that's a little forward.

I don't mean to like--

- I'm sorry we're just like talking,

me and my girlfriend.

- Yeah.

- It's girls night.

- Oh, I'm sorry.

I don't wanna interrupt you.

What kind of girls night are we talking here?

- We just haven't seen each other

- What do you mean?

- I have no idea what I mean.

I'm sorry, awesome, okay.

- Have a good night.

- ALright, you too.

(whistles)

- Hi. - Hi.

- How's it going?

- Good. - I'm Matt.

- I'm Elaine, nice to meet you.

- Good to meet you.

- What do you do?

- I'm a video game developer.

- Oh, cool.

Sounds fun.

- Yeah.

- Sound very smart.

- Some people have maybe said that in the past.

(Elaine laughs)

I guess I'm, yeah, I'm alright.

- Do you do well for yourself?

Do you make good money?

- Yeah, I do alright.

My game is doing alright, yeah.

- You obviously have like a cool job,

it seems like you do well,

I'm like really really struck for cash right now.

And I could like hardly afford this drink

to be honest.

Its really embarrassing but like,