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  • SPEAKING OF BREAKOUT STARS OF THE INAUGURATION, WE HAVE

  • ANOTHER ONE WITH US IN-- REG, DO YOU NOTICE ANYTHING DIFFERENT

  • ABOUT THE STUDIO OR THE BAND?

  • TONIGHT.

  • >> Reggie: OH, THE GARLIC, GUILLERMO LOOKS PRETTY RAD, TIM,

  • LOOKING SHARP.

  • AND STEVE LOOKING GOOD.

  • >> James: YEAH.

  • >> Reggie: I DON'T KNOW.

  • OH, A NEW BARTENDER.

  • >> James: A NEW BARTENDER.

  • HE'S STANDING IN FOR IAN.

  • YOU WILL SEE THIS IMAGE EVERYWHERE AT THE MOMENT.

  • LOOK AT THAT, LOOK, I'M LOVING HAVING HIM HERE.

  • EVEN THE AUDIENCE IS FILLED OUT.

  • >> Reggie: IT'S NICE.

  • >> James: IT IS A CARDBOARD CUTOUT.

  • IT IS A CARDBOARD CUT OUT AND YET SHOW I CAN STILL HEAR HIM

  • YELLING.

  • DO YOU THINK BERN YE SANDERS KNOWS THAT THIS IS A THING?

  • LIKE DO YOU THINK HE EVEN KNOWS WHAT A MEME?

  • >> I THINK THEY SHOW IT TO HIM AND HE'S JUST LIKE.

  • >> THAT'S GREAT.

  • >> I THINK IS HE NONPLUSSED SWRZ I RECKON THIS IS THE FIRST TIME

  • BERNIE'S FINDING OUT ABOUT THIS BEING A THING.

  • I DON'T KNOW WHERE THIS ENDS.

  • YOU HAVE GOT TO SAY, AS A SHOW, WE HAVE REALLY COMMITTED TO IT.

  • SO YEAH, THAT WAS IT.

  • TALK TO ME ABOUT THIS.

  • GUILLERMO, REG, DID YOU GET IN TOUCH WITH EACH OTHER THIS

  • MORNING AND GO ARE YOU GOING TO WEAR YOUR CAMO JACKET?

  • THIS LOOKS LIKE IT'S MADE BY THE SAME PERSON, IS IT?

  • DO WE KNOW?

  • >> PROBABLY NOT, PROBABLY REGGIE'S COST MUCH MORE THAN

  • MINE.

  • >> Reggie: THAT'S REALLY SWEET.

  • >> James: I CAN ONLY IMAGINE THAT THAT'S TRUE.

  • >> Reggie: THIS OLD THING.

  • >> James: ANYTHING REGGIE'S GOT COSTS MORE THAN ANYTHING ANY

  • OF US HAVE WORN IN OUR LIVES, THAT IS THE TRUTH OF IT.

  • THAT IS THE ABSOLUTELY TRUTH.

  • WHEN I'M IN THE PARKING LOT, WELL, WHEN THERE USED TO BE

  • PEOPLE HERE IN TV CITY I WOULD BE WALKING TO MY CAR AND THEY GO

  • LOOK, IS THAT YOUR POR SHALL, AND I GO NO, THAT'S REGGIES.

  • MINE'S JUST THAT ONE ON THE END.

  • AND THEY LOOK AT ME LIKE WELL, YOU'RE IN-- NO, NO, THAT IS THE

  • TRUTH OF IT IS, THAT IS THE TRUTH OF IT.

  • YEAH.

  • IT I CAN'T IMAGINE IF IT ENDS UP ANYWHERE SUNNY-- FUNNY, SUSAN,

  • WE'LL FIND OUT.

  • BUT UNLIKELY GIVEN HOW WELL THE WHOLE BERNIE THING HAS GONEMENT

  • BUT REGGIE HAS BOUGHT MY DREAM CAR, YEAH, HE'S GOT IT WOW,

  • INDEED, SUSAN.

  • THAT IS WHAT I AM THINKING, WOW.

  • HOW DID THAT HAPPEN.

  • I GO OUT EVERY NIGHT, I LOOK AT MY KIDS AND I THINK, IF YOU

  • WEREN'T HERE.

  • >> THAT'S THE TRUTH.

  • >> THAT IS THE TRUTH.

  • >> James: I DESPITE-- DES PIES THEM FOR IT.

  • >> I'M DOING IT FOR YOU.

  • >> James: I LOOK AT THE SCHOOL FEES I'M PAYING OUT FOR THEM TO

  • SIT IN THEIR OWN ROOM ON ZOOM.

  • PAYING OUT SCHOOL FEES FOR BASICALLY WHAT IS AN ONLINE

  • TUTORIAL.

  • AND I DRIVE PAST REGGIE AND I THINK I COULD HAVE THAT CAR IF

  • IT WASN'T FOR YOU.

  • MOVING ON TO THE HEADLINES, IT WAS THE FIRST FULL DAY, TERENCE,

  • WHAT ARE YOU TAKING A PHOTO OF.

  • HAVE WE NOT-- (LAUGHTER).

  • >> James: DO WE NOT HAVE THIS PHOTO ALREADY IN THE ARCHIVES?

  • IS THIS, IS THIS SOME NEWS, DO WE NOT HAVE SHALL IT-- YOUR

  • LAPTOP MUST JUST BE FULL OF PHOTOS OF ME AT THIS DESK DOING

  • THIS, LIKE I THINK WE'VE GOT THIS ONE COVERED.

  • IS THERE ANYTHING NEW, I LOVE THAT ARE YOU HERE T BONE BUT I

  • FEEL WE'VE COVERED THE JAMES AT THE DESK SHOT.

  • WELL, MOVING ON, LET'S LOOK AT THE HEADLINES.

  • IT WAS THE FIRST FULL DAY OF THE BIDEN ADMINISTRATION AND THE

  • PRESIDENT GOT RIGHT TO WORK THIS MORNING SIGNING TEN EXECUTIVE

  • ORDERS TODAY, RELATED TO THE COVID-19 PANDEMIC.

  • SURE.

  • FINE.

  • YEAH, YOU WANT TO CLAP, SUSAN, GREAT.

  • IS HE FRIENDS WITH THE DICTATOR OF NORTH KOREA, NO?

  • DIDN'T THINK SO.

  • I MEAN EVENTUALLY, EVENTUALLY STORIES LIKE THIS, ABOUT A

  • PRESIDENT BEING COMPETENT WILL BE SO COMMON WE WON'T EVEN HAVE

  • TO START THE SHOW LIKE THIS.

  • WE WON'T EVEN TALK ABOUT HIM.

  • WE CAN JUST DO JOKES ABOUT, YOU KNOW, A MAPLE SYRUP TRUCK THAT

  • HAS FALLEN OVER.

  • >> Reggie: OR NARROW HOUSING.

  • >> James: SOME GUY BUILT A THREE STORY BONG, WE WILL OPEN

  • WITH THAT.

  • ALL WILL BE RIGHT AGAIN.

  • BUT UNTIL THEN, AMAZON HAS EXTENDED AN OFFER TO PRESIDENT

  • BIDEN TO HELP WITH THE NATIONAL DISTRIBUTION OF CORONAVIRUS

  • VACCINES.

  • >> Reggie: YES.

  • >> James: THAT WILL SPEED THINGS UP.

  • ALTHOUGH, WELL, FOR SOME REASON EACH TINY VIEL IS STILL GOING TO

  • COME IN A GIGANTIC CARDBOARD BOX.

  • THAT HAS JUST BEEN KICKED OVER THE FENCE INTO YOUR GARDEN.

  • I DON'T KNOW HOW I FEEL ABOUT IN.

  • I'M NOT SURE I LIKE IT.

  • I THIS THINK THIS WILL PUT A LOT OF HISTORIC MOM AND POP

  • VACCINATION CENTERS OUT OF BUSINESS.

  • IF AMAZON REALLY WANTS TO STEP THINGS UP THEY SHOULD LEAN INTO

  • THE AMAZON PRIME TV TALENT.

  • JUST HAVE ALL THE VACCINES ADMINISTERED BY THE HOT PRIEST

  • FROM FLEABAG.

  • THAT'S A SHAME.

  • WE MOVED ON FROM FLEABAG THAT EARLY.

  • BERNIE?

  • BERNIE LOOKS A BIT BOARD, A BIT CARD-BOARD.

  • (APPLAUSE) CANCEL AMANDA GORMAN, WE'LL JUST

  • PLAY THAT JOKE FOR TEN MINUTES.

  • AND THIS IS EXCITING, THIS MORNING THE UNITED STATES

  • OFFICIALLY REJOINED THE WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION,

  • REVERSE-- YES, REVERSING A DECISION THAT WAS MADE BY TRUMP

  • LAST YEAR, DR. FAUCI ATTENDED A WHO MEETING TODAY AND BEGAN BY

  • SAYING, SO, THAT WAS AWKWARD.

  • IT IS GREAT NEWS BUT I HAVE TO SAY THE BAR IS PRETTY LOW, FOR

  • GOOD PRESIDENTING RIGHT NOW, ISN'T IT.

  • BIDEN GOES LET'S REJIN THE WORLD HEALTH ORGANIZATION DURING A

  • GLOBAL PANDEMIC AND WE'RE ALL LIKE OH MY GOD!

  • THAT IS AN AMAZING IDEA, WHERE DOES HE GET THESE IDEAS FROM, I

  • LOVE THIS GUY, WHAT?

  • ISN'T THAT RIGHT, BERN.

  • EXACTLY.

  • AND BIDEN IS MAKING SOME OTHER CHANGES AS WELL.

  • HE APPARENTLY HAS REMOVED DONALD TRUMP'S DIET COKE BUTTON FROM

  • THE OVAL OFFICE.

  • DO YOU REMEMBER THAT, HE WOULD PRESS A BUTTON AND A BUTLER

  • WOULD BRING IN A DIET COKE ON A SILVER PLATTER.

  • I'M GOING TO SAY IT, BIDEN HAS UNDONE THE ONE GOOD IDEA TRUMP

  • EVER HAD.

  • BIDEN TOOK OUT TRUMP'S DIET COKE BUTT BUTTON, UNFORTUNATELY HE

  • REPLACED IT WITH A MET AMUSE-- METAMUCIL BUTTON.

  • I THINK I WOULD LIKE A DRINK BUTTON.

  • I THINK I WOULD LIKE THAT.

  • HAVE I BRN DOING THE SHOW SIX YEARS, I DON'T HAVE A DRINK

  • BUTTON.

  • ROB, GET THE NETWORK ON THE LINE, I WANT A PELLEGRINO

  • BUTTON.

  • >> Reggie: NICE.

  • >> PELLEGRINO BUTTON, I WANT IT TOMORROW OR I WILL WALK.

  • WHAT ARE THEY GOING DO AFTER THE AFC CHAMPIONSHIP THEN, HUH?

  • YEAH, LET'S FLEX THOSE MUSCLES, RIGHT?

  • PELLEGRINO BUTTON OR I WALK.

  • >> ON IT, ON IT.

  • >> James: GONE.

  • (LAUGHTER).

  • >> James: DO I THINK-- DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD DO THAT.

  • >> I THINK IT WOULD BE US DOING IT.

  • I DON'T KNOW WHO ELSE WILL GET INVOLVED WITH THIS PELLEGRINO

  • BUTTON BUT WE CAN PROBABLY MAKE IT HAPPEN.

  • >> James: AN HERE WE G THE BIG STORY, BIG NEWS, ROB GET READY,

  • BERNIE, YOU READY?

  • OF COURSE HE IS, CHEEKY BAS TARD, GET THIS, DONALD TRUMP'S

  • FINAL LATCH OF PRESIDENT YESTERDAY WAS TO EXTEND SECRET

  • SERVICE PROTECTION FOR HIS ADULT CHILDREN POTENTIALLY COSTING

  • TAXPAYERS MILLIONS OF DOLLARS, TRUMP'S CHILDREN WERE LIKE THANK

  • GOD BECAUSE THIS WOMAN HAS BEEN TALKING US, SHE'S EVERYWHERE AND

  • ST A LITTLE SCARY AND THE WOMAN WAS LIKE MY NAME IS TIFFANY.

  • CAN YOU IMAGINE BEING ONE OF SECRET SERVICE OFFICERS, LIKE IS

  • THERE A FATE WORSE THAN BEING FORCED TO TAKE A BULLET FOR ERIC

  • TRUMP?

  • YOU TRAIN YOUR WHOLE LIFE.

  • YOU GET IN THE SECRET SERVICE.

  • YOUR PARENTS ARE PROUD.

  • NO ONE CAN BELIEVE IT.

  • AND ONE SAYS SO TELL ME, WHAT DO YOU DO.

  • AND THEY'RE LIKE I PROTECT ERIC TRUMP.

  • AND THEN SOMETIMES HAVE I TO LOOK THE OTHER WAY WHEN DN ALD,

  • JR. AND KIMBERLY GUILFOYLE GO TO THE BATHROOM TOGETHER.

  • AND FINALLY A RESTAURANT IN THE UNITED KINGDOM IS HOPING TO OPEN

  • SOON WITH A COVID SAFE DINING EXPERIENCE.

  • BECAUSE THEY PLAN TO USE ROBOT WAITERS TO TAKE ORDERS AND BRING

  • OUT THE FOOD.

  • HERE ARE THE WAITERS HERE.

  • YEAH.

  • THE FACE MAKES IT SO MUCH MORE WELCOMING.

  • THE OWNER OF THE RESTAURANT THINKS THAT THESE ROBOTS ARE THE

  • FUTURE BUT THE ROBOTS SAY THEY ARE ONLY DOING THIS UNTIL THEIR

  • ACTING CAREERS TAKE OFF.

  • CAN WE SEE THE WAITERS AGAIN?

  • ANY GUESS WHAT KIND OF FOOD THEY SERVE, GUILLERMO.

  • >> I WILL TELL YOU, MEGA BITES.

  • WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK

SPEAKING OF BREAKOUT STARS OF THE INAUGURATION, WE HAVE

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Freezing Bernie Sanders Is In the House!

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    林宜悉 posted on 2021/01/22
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